From: wu@bahamuttone.net (Wu) Subject: [Eva][FanFic] New Genesis Evangelion X-Original-Date: Thu, 12 Jun 2003 11:58:29 GMT Hello Everybody. I'm new in this newsgroup so I hope I'm not doing any real big mistake ^^ This is a fanfiction written by me and a friend of mine Since we are both Italian there are probably a bunch of errors. Some things just didn't get transalted well so a lot fo puns got lost One thing that got lost was the title We named the fanfic "Nuova Genesi Evangelion" which is the literal translation of Shin Seiki Evangelion in italian because in our contry the sho was left named Neon Genesis Evangelion so we thought it would be a good joke ^^ Hope You Enjoy reading this. We are really eager to get some comment about this so PLEASE mail us what do you think ^^ A small notice from the authors Warning! This Fanfiction can seriously mine your mind sanity. These useless preface words are, indeed, useless. We would like to inform you of a pair of thing about what you are going to read... 1) It is mainly based on Evangelion 2) There shouldn't be any spoiler to who has seen the sixth issue 3) During the reading you could note some fluctuation in the way of writing, This is caused by the fact that who gained control of the keyboard also gained control over the fanfiction 4) We can be contacted at our e-mail Jolan-Tru cloudstrf@usa.net [Status Unknown] Bahamuttone Aka Wu wu@jpknet.com Karsten karsten@auritech.com 5) Thanks: Karsten's broken keyboard, Karsten mother, Ciccio for being, Karsten mother's snacks, Jolan-Tru for aiding with the keyboard, |ZENON| for encouraging us continuing writing bullshit (blame him...), Kagura aka Kenshin_Himura for having done nothing useful, Square Soft for its games, Nobuo Uematsu for the music of SquareSoft's Games, Evangelion for existing, Rei, Asuka, Misato for beauty, and Shinji for being the stress reliever Some boring stuff Evangelion is a property of Gainax, as every character The character of Karsten, Bahamuttone, Jolan-Tru are our copyright; every infraction to this copyright will be punished personally by us with a BIG STAFF The SoulEdge come from the homonymous game from Namco and are a copyright of Namco itself Nobody is authorized to modify this file! But you are allowed to redistribute it to everyone you know.... ======================================================================== EPISODE 01 ANGEL ATTACK ======================================================================== Outdoor. Underwater scene An enormous being moves silently amid the ruin of a submerged city Railway station Voice: Today at 12: 30 has been declared the emergency state in the whole region of Kanto and Chubu and especially in the zone of Tokai, it is advisable to get into the designed haven with the most haste Boy at a Phone pole: the phones aren't working and the trains are blocked. Really the best moment... The boy exit the station Boy: What a bad luck, right the day of the meeting. The boy looks at a photo by which we understand that he is called Shinji, the photo pictures a very pretty girl A plane flies at a very low height. A bunch of missiles pass by Shinji crashing into the giant being came from the sea without harming it A plane crash near Shinji causing an explosion from which he is shielded by a sport car with a screech of tires The girl of the photo helps Shinji getting on the car Tactical room On the screens flashes the image of the enormous being totally unharmed by the attack of the defense force. Three generals seem impotent from their position. Two shadowy figures are watching the images assessing the waste. The focus change on two being flopped on a couch. On their stiff uniform are noticeable two handmade ID card: "Auxiliary Pilot". The two dudes strange dialogue in Italian. Karsten: Come on Baha, don't you remember what Ms Misato has said? Bahamuttone: No I remember something else about Miss Misato H__H Karsten: Well...However I was talking about the chance of us going out into action... Bahamuttone: And they should have found another pilot; The Third Children or something like that. Karsten: I hope they aren't going to send Rei out in mission Bahamuttone: But wasn't she half dead? Karsten: Yes, but they are capable of that. At this point I would like to go myself. Bahamuttone: Right, the commander seems bastard enough.... Are you sure you feel right? Getting on that thing Karsten: Yeah, but would you let Rei aboard in such a condition? She would have almost less hopes than we would... Bahamuttone: You are optimistic, aren't you? However they shouldn't call us. Speaker: Auxiliary Pilot Karsten and Bahamuttone are required to present themselves at the cages. Both: Oh §hit.... Karsten: Where does that £&%$/(&$ of a pilot has hidden? Bahamuttone: I've heard that Miss Misato was going to collect him. Karsten: She will be getting a beer... Bahamuttone: May be Speaker: Auxiliary Pilot Karsten and Bahamuttone are required to present themselves at the cages AT ONCE! Bahamuttone: OOOps it's better if we get moving. While the two guys were chatting an N2 mine has been launched on the target without getting any definitive result Once at the cages the two pilots are seeing an impressive scene: a girl on a stretcher is brought towards a massive robot. The girl seem really needing the stretcher since she is in awful condition... besides her there is Shinji in his classical useless stand Karsten: But...but.... Are they going to let Rei aboard in such a condition!!!!!!! Where is that idiot of a pilot? Bahamuttone: I think he is that kiddo there.... Karsten: Why isn't he getting aboard.... I'll kill him!! Karsten charge forward with an unsettling big sword Bahamuttone stopping Karsten: I don't think it's a good idea. First you will have to explain how you smudged in that knife. Second he is chief's son. Karsten: He has never cared about...but it will be difficult explaining this...Ok I've got the solution. (Shouting) Miss Misato we are going! Bahamuttone: Shit, He has gone insane again. (Trying silencing Karsten) Don't mind him Captain!! Karsten: (half choked by Bahamuttone) I'm... hack... goin... Misato show evident sign of worry Shinji seem totally absent Ritsuko, chief of the project, seem even more worried than Misato Fuyutsuki to Gendo: Maybe we shall really get them aboard Gendo: Absolutely no, it's too risky... Karsten: If you give me a can of beer I'll pass all the connection stages! Ritsuko a Gendo: It could be an idea; so instead of losing a unit and a pilot we lose only the unit... Gendo: we could lose the whole base... Fuyutsuki: If they will do the same as the simulations they will destroy the angel. Gendo: Only if we succeed in launching them without destroying everything... The angel shoots through the geofront. The blow causes damage even inside the cage, some girders and part of the lighting system fall from the roof over Shinj who is saved by Eva's hand which moves to shield him Rei falls of the stretcher Karsten charges out at the rescue but Shinji get there first, mainly because Bahamuttone wasn't blocking him. Karsten goes into limit break seeing Shinji touching Rei and frees himself of Bahamuttone whom falls into the cooling liquid. Karsten charges out again but fumbles on a high voltage cable and falls after Bahamuttone. Bahamuttone: I didn't know that the cooling liquid was flavored strawberry.... Karsten tries not to lose his sword swimming. Shinji: I'll go! Baha & Kar: WHAT???? Shinji is aboard Eva Karsten grins happily: So he will learn! Bahamuttone carrying some beer: Captain would you like one? Misato... Karsten: If the captain doesn't want it I'll take it, she is on duty. Bahamuttone looks towards the screen monitoring the Eva: Jeez, the newbie is doing good, Not even Rei had a synchrony rate so high. Ritsuko: It's incredible. Karsten: Don't worry, It will fall after two step Bahamuttone: If you say so... Misato: Launch!!!!!! The Eva exits from the ground exactly in front of the angel. Ritsuko: Now think only of walking Shinji: The Eva takes a step Karsten: One The other people of the crew: It has taken a step!!!! Bahamuttone: He has a high synchrony, but poor capacities; Karsten's foresee is probably right. The Eva stumbles destructively Karsten: boom.. Bahamuttone: I think that now the angel will enjoy itself. Karsten: Now it will catch him, break an arm and then plaster him on a skyscraper Bahamuttone: The right or the left, I'm taking bet... Karsten: after plastering him to the skyscraper it will break him piece by piece. Bahamuttone: It's very likely. I hope there is another Eva ready or we will meet a really bad end.. Misato: Would you mind stopping bringing bad luck? Karsten emptying the beer: At this moment I could do better... Bahamuttone: Why do you hate him so much to send him aboard in such a manner? Misato even more depressed... The angel is demolishing the Eva and plasters it on a skyscraper after breaking its left arm. Bahamuttone collects 50000 yen of bet. Ritsuko: How could you know what was going to happen? Karsten: Well I've made a calculation of the variables and of the pshycofisic aptitudes of the pilot interpolating with... Bahamuttone: In short it is what happens to us during simulations Karsten: We knew what was expecting us. The linking with the Eva start breaking Misato: Precedence to the pilot, Forced ejection of the entry plug Bahamuttone: It won't work, it's all gone... Maya: The Eva is not responding to the commands! Karsten: What are you writing on that card? Bahamuttone: It's the scratch for a mourn card for the commander Karsten: Put also my name in it. Misato: I swear that the next time I'll send this two out in mission. Karsten: ..... The Eva seem to have gotten enough ad begins roaring Bahamuttone: wow Usually it happens directly at the cages with us... Ritsuko: It's in Berserk! Misato: Better think about it twice Fuyutsuki: We have won. Bahamuttone: I wouldn't like to be in the hides of that angel Karsten: Baha tear that paper Bahamuttone from the incinerator: What paper? Karsten: Who knows if he is still alive? Bahamuttone: I think so. Karsten: Then let's finish him ourselves Bahamuttone: Still angry? Karsten: No! Meanwhile the Eva is dismantling the angel The angel felling its imminent demise tries to take with it the Eva but without result. The Eva lose its facial armor Shinji cries seeing the Eva's eye regenerating. Bahamuttone: What a wimp Karsten: Are we going to take him from the hospital? Misato: NO!!!! Shinji reawakens in the hospital. Radio: one two three four, and one two three four Shinji exits his room and sees a stretcher with Rei on it travelling the alley Bahamuttone and Karsten are following Bahamuttone: Ehi isn't that the newbie... Karsten: Rei is better. Bahamuttone: Yeah, but you can't beat her... Shinji pales and take cover inside his room Bahamuttone: what a loss... Karsten and Bahamuttone returns home Bahamuttone enjoys himself with his favorite hobby, spying on their neighbor: Miss Misato... Bahamuttone: the mobile camera installed yesterday functions wonderfully. Karsten reading the training program: mh, Baha do you know that maybe they are willing to send us out in mission sometimes? Next week we have got seventy-five hours of training. And they are going to give us a decent ID card and a plug suit... Bahamuttone: I doubt they will find one that will fit me.... Ehi the newbie is at captain's house! Karsten: What are you saying? Bahamuttone: Look for yourself. On the monitor there are Shinj and Misato having dinner Bahamuttone: How could one be luckier... Bahamuttone shut down the monitor disgusted Karsten: Ehi Baha, we are out of beer... Bahamuttone: we can go ask the captain... are you going? Karsten: All right; how much? Bahamuttone: Your choice. Karsten goes out and knock at Misato's door Misato: What is it? Karsten: Mah, We would like to know if you could lend us some beer just for surviving the night, ten ought to be enough. Misato: ok but get back your supply fast.... Karsten follows Misato admiring her marvelous shorts... A shriek pierce the silence Bahamuttone runs believing that also Misato has run out of beer. Entering Bahamuttone sees Karsten on the floor... Shinji is hiding back the door although the red light from his face is still visible... Karsten gets a hang on himself, stops laughing and comes back on his feet. Bahamuttone: Pen-pen? Karsten nods solemnly Misato takes the two to the door evidently embarrassed Then she wonders on how Bahamuttone has entered the house since the door was locked Misato: Ehi Bahamutt... Misato is alone in the alleyway, the two are vanished Bahamuttone: do you think the captain will get angry if she discover that we have got a copy of her keys? Karsten: not as much as if she discovers the cameras and the microphones... Bahamuttone: it was a great thing that Jolan had got to do some works in her house... Karsten: Right After the week spent training Bahamuttone: Ehi Kar today the newbie should go to school. What do you say, are we going to catch him after school being two affectionate sempai? Karsten: Let's catch him and then let's go get some beer. Karsten and Bahamuttone are going towards Shinji School In the yard there are some boys. They seem to be arguing. One of them is repeatedly punched. The beaten is that wimp of Shinji Bahamuttone: It's unfair. Only us have got the right to beat him! Karsten: I want some for me! While Shinji stays laying on the ground the other two boys leaves. A voice addresses Karsten and Bahamuttone Voice: There is an emergency call. Go back to the base Karsten is on another planet having recognized the voice Karsten: An emergency call? What is an emergency call? Bahamuttone: Let's go, I'll explain it to you... Nerv operative center. Geofront Misato: We have given you the communicator to use them not to leave them in the pocket shut down.... Karsten: But we were going to take a beer with Shinji after 75 hours of training Bahamuttone: and Nerv doesn't pay for the batteries... Misato:... Bahamuttone: Ah, was a plug suit fit for me found? Misato: Ehmm let's talk about something else... Karsten: Ehi but so Bahamuttone will not ever go out in mission Bahamuttone: Not to talk about the entry plug that is overly small. Misato: However Karsten hasn't got this problems. Karsten: What does that mean? Misato: That you have got to get prepared in the event that Shinji isn't willing to get aboard. Bahamuttone: Ops. Karsten: Ehmm. I need the ID card to open the locker and a plug suit... Misato: Here it is the ID card. The plug suit is in the locker. Karsten: Shit. But weren't they going to be ready only next week? Misato: in the Nerv ALMOST all work hard and do their better to fight the angels Bahamuttone: Let's guess at whom is she referring.... Karsten goes to change and after a couple of minutes gets back Karsten: this plug suit is too much form fitting and this thing doesn't fit... Misato: To get a better connection you could go naked and cut the beard. Bahamuttone: It's a show you don't want to see sir.... Karsten wasn't listening. He was looking at Rei who was going to the locker room. Bahamuttone: Don't get strange ideas, Kar Karsten: Who? Me? However why are you going to get three pilots reedy? Misato: We are readying two pilots Karsten: Why? Shinji isn't here today? Bahamuttone: Ehm, I think she was referring to the fact that she doesn't consider you a pilot.... Karsten: Well then I can drink on duty! Let's! Karsten fishes out a five liter barrel and begins drinking it merrily Misato: ... Ritsuko: The damages caused by carelessness of the pilot will be debited to the pilot themselves Karsten spit out the whole barrel Bahamuttone: What? But even a nail of one of that thing costs more than what we earn in three years... In the meantime Shinji got ready and was getting aboard the Eva. The Eva is shoot out Bahamuttone still wonders on how it can be accomplished given the enormous empty space between the base and the city basement. Got on the surface, Shinji exit from the armed building and start firing to the angel without refrains Bahamuttone: Smarter than ever, eh? How can one give a smoke cover to the enemy on self-initiative? An energy tentacle shoots out the cloud severing the Shinji Pallet Gun and one of the buildings Misato: you need the back up rifle. One of the armed buildings opens itself showing a pallet gun. Shinji looks at the angel drowsily The angel catches him and throws him on the nearby hill Maya: Umbilical Cable severed! Five minutes from shutdown. Bahamuttone: Wow he could do worse than us! Karsten: .... Amidst the finger of the Eva there are two boys. The angel restart attacking. Shinji catches the angel tentacles heavily damaging Eva's hand Misato: Who are those two? Maya: They are two classmates of Shinji. The data sheet of the two appears Bahamuttone: Jeez, They always have to write all in Kanji damn... Karsten: Aren't they the ones that have beaten the newbie? Bahamuttone searching trough the kanji dictionary: Oh it's them. Now the newbie has got the way to get revenge. Misato: Shinji get those two aboard. Ritsuko: Captain Katsuragi that is beyond your competence. You can't get two civilians aboard an Eva. Misato: Eject the entry plug Misato from the speaker: Ehi, You two fast get into the entry plug Maya: errors into the syncrographics Misato: Shinji retire in the entry B12 The Eva stands up groggily One of the supports on a shoulder of the Eva opens e a knife's handle pops out. Maya: Progressive Knife activated. Bahamuttone: What does he hopes to do with that Swiss knife? Karsten: ... Bahamuttone: Has someone shut down your audio? Karsten: ... The Eva shoots down the hill while Shinji shouts of pain; the tentacles have broken the abdomen armor of the Eva. However Shinji succeeds in getting the Progressive Knife into the angel nucleus. The angel dies just in the same moment when the internal battery dies. The Eva and the angel stand blocked in a theatrical position. Bahamuttone: wow! Karsten: For once I've to admit that he has got courage. We have to give him our compliments Baha. Bahamuttone: ?????Kar? Misato: Whaaaat? Compliments? He has not followed an order from his direct superior! And he has risked dying! Misato gets away willing to give a really deep shit session at the pilot. Karsten: The captain has not understood anything. This experience will serve him, I'm sure. Bahamuttone: It will serve to convince him that it's too risky getting aboard and then it will be our turn. Karsten shakes out of his reflections. Karsten: What about a beer? Bahamuttone: Ok, let's go. The two of them goes taking a beer [Karsten first get out of the plug suit] Shinji refuse to go to school for 3 days Karsten and Bahamuttone are informed of this by the surveillance implant The third day evening Karsten: Why of all the pilots only us have got this devastating training Bahamuttone: boh Karsten However Misato still say that we are not going to be sent in mission Bahamuttone: but your ID card and your plug suit are ready The morning of the day after Misato is in front of Shinji's room Bahamuttone: Wow the look disastrous morning it's really mythic! Misato: Do you want to stay home even today Misato opens the door to the room The room is empty Bahamuttone: he has left about 20 minutes ago, however with the bug I can trace him in 45 seconds Karsten: Now you even put bugs on people? Now or then you will get us arrested! Bahamuttone: Nooo! They can't find that bug. It's shielded against every revealing system! Jeez, at the defense know how to do these things, you know? Karsten: Defense? What do mean with defense? Bahamuttone: the JSSDF... You know the other day I was tinkering with their computer so I've managed to get ten or so... Karsten: If you get caught I'll testimony against you. Bahamuttone: and I'll denounce your collection of swords... Karsten: Ehi that's another thing!!! Panoramic over Karsten's room: the walls are covered with big swords and giantography of Rei Panoramic over Bahamuttone's room: there are no giantography mostly because there is not space left. The whole room is full of vaguely technological looking junk, weapons of some sort, models and books on computer programming. The day after Karsten and Bahamuttone after the usual 8 hours of training notice the unusual activity of the base. Everyone seems busy for the vanishing of Shinji Bahamuttone: Mah, what are they worrying about I don't know! Yesterday he has spent all the day on the metro and the night at a cinema [Real fun, you know] Karsten: We have got to tell them where is Shinji, without letting them know why we know... Bahamuttone: now he is on the hills. It's a lonely place and it shouldn't be anything there... Let's log to the satellite and check... On Bahamuttone's laptop screen appears the logo of the defense force followed by the login of the satellitary control system Karsten: I have to ask for a transfer.... Bahamuttone: Why? Ah here he is! He is with that other guy, the one with the glasses. They are eating around a campfire. Karsten: Are you going to tell Misato yourself? Bahamuttone: Why not? Karsten: Go on that I'll follow... Bahamuttone: I've just sent her the images with the geographical coordinates. Ah I've used Shinji's login to do all this... Karsten: Why not ordering a year of beer? Bahamuttone: Good idea. Karsten: and get also the sword of Frederick II Bahamuttone: .......... Shinji got caught by the men in black of Nerv and taken to the train that will take him home. Shinji, dumb as he is, manage to lose the train and tries to hide his embarrass showing self-confidence. Bills of a total of 250 million yen submerge Shinji. Misato's House: Misato, Ritsuko and Shinji are sitting at the table eating. As usual Baha is spying from his terminal. Karsten: Baha, Get a hold on this. There is even the privacy law now! Bahamuttone: ok but I thought it would interest you that the newbie is going to take the new ID card to Rei! Karsten: What luck! But what I can do about it? Bahamuttone: I've discovered some extra function of that bug I've got on Shinji, it can transmit the image of the area surrounding it in a range of about three meters. It can be a neat thing, don't you think? Karsten: Neat. Is it working already? Bahamuttone: Yeah, but the colors are a bit wrong, you know how it is.... Karsten: Let's try it today! Bahamuttone: Ok, will we follow the newbie or you think he can't do any harm? Karsten: Who? Shinji? What do you think he can do? He only has to deliver an ID card! Bahamuttone: Well, but I've got a presentment, I'm feeling a tremble in the force that I don't like Karsten: Ok do as you think right, only let me see the result first hand. Some days later Voice: An unidentified flying object is nearing Neo-Tokyo 3 Bahamuttone: Yeah call it an object...It's almost a km long and it seem a d8... Nerv strategic room Misato: Who are we sending? Ritsuko: I'll send Shinji he is more reliable. Misato: I agree. Fuyutsuki: Send Karsten. Misato & Ritsuko: WHAT!!!!!! Fuyutsuki: Are you going to disobey a direct order? Misato: No sir! Another room Bahamuttone: I feel a presence in the force I didn't felt for a long time.... Ehmm what bullshit I'm saying? However I've a bad feeling, I think it will not go well to you Kar, It seemed the Unnamable presence... Karsten: How could you be drunk at nine o'clock? Bahamuttone: Eight drink... Karsten: Then I can take it easy... Bahamuttone: No when I'm drunk I see the thing more prettily than they are... Misato enters the room Bahamuttone: Hello captain, what brings you here? Misato: the fact that your friends here is bound to go to the cages to go out. Karsten: Ahahaha! Good joke! Bahamuttone: I've said that we would have done better continuing drinking today... Misato: It's not a joke. Karsten: Why do you want me aboard? Misato: Order from above. Karsten: So I MUST go? Misato: Yes! Karsten: Then I'll be considered a pilot? Obviously I want the pay of a pilot. Bahamuttone: It's higher now... Karsten: I mean I want both pays obviously. And insurance and integration! Misato: It's better if you get moving Bahamuttone: Good luck Kar! Karsten: What do you think it can do me? It's only a big dice! Bahamuttone: Don't underestimate the power of the dark side of the force... Karsten: You have seen too much times Star Wars. If I get hurt I'm going to beat you because you bring bad luck!! Bahamuttone: It's not me, it's the Emperor. Karsten get to de dressing room. Makoto: Cooling phase terminated! Shigeru: The pilot has taken position in the entry plug! Makoto: Roger Inserting entry plug! Maya: Insert effectuated. First Stage of connection! Maya: Emission LCL in the entry plug. Shigeru: The LCL is making some kind of bubbles on the sides of the entry plug! Maya: Doing liquid analysis, the volume of the liquid is going down. Karsten: Glub Glub Bahamuttone: I didn't thought they were going to use that LCL... Karsten: Hic! I'm NoT GoiNg to pAy thE DamaGe... Burp Misato: .............. Maya: Analysis completed. It's... Misato: Beer. Maya: Exactly. Alcohol 12.5 % Bahamuttone: Jeez why the du Demon! Misato stares coolly towards Bahamuttone. Maya: the synchronic rate is going up from 12% to 65% Ritsuko: Let's try powering it up... Maya: Power connected, connecting... Makoto: Synaptic linking of A10 nerve. Shigeru: Anomalies in the connection, language error! Ritsuko: That deficient thinks in Italian.... Maya: Interface Language set to Italian. I/O nervous links activated. The synchrony rate has an error of 3% Ritsuko: Mah... it's better than I expected... Bahamuttone: It's the beer... Misato: Get ready the Eva for launch! Maya: positioning Eva01 for launch! Prelaunch test completed! Path verify all green! Misato: Hashin! Bahamuttone: but... His lungs weren't filled of LCL, were they? Ritsuko: Ops... Bahamuttone: it's nothing, He is a though boy... Karsten: AAAAAAARGHHHHHHhh....* The Eva exits the launch port. Shigeru: High-energy reaction in the target! Misato: What? Bahamuttone: What a pretty particle cannon! (3° stratum) Misato: Shin..Ehm, Karsten, take cover!! The angel shoot demolishing a building first the Eva then Karsten: ..... Misato: Get the Eva back Bahamuttone: I notice a certain carelessness for the pilot.... Ritsuko: wasn't better reentering him slower? The Eva is taken back into the base. Shigeru: No activity in the target. Misato: How is the pilot? Makoto: Altered ECC, weak pulsation, heavy breathing crisis. Maya: anchor Unit 01 at cage 13! Bahamuttone: Really lucky... Ritsuko: Forced ejection of the entry plug! Take out the LCL!! Maya: Roger! The foam is blocking the conduit! Ritsuko: Damn beer...Take him to the First aid! Karsten is taken to the first aid Misato is worrying about the condition of the Eva Bahamuttone: Mah... will he get out of the crisis?.... What that d8 is doing however? The angel has taken out a kind of drill and has begun drilling the ground. Ritsuko: What are the conditions of the target? Makoto: It is perforating the ground, advancing towards the geo-front and the QG. A giant Eva shaped balloon is got towards the angel The angel shots it with the particle cannon. Voice: the target has been vaporized Misato: Proceed A cannon on rails shoots towards the angel The shot bounce away on the A.T.Field The angel shoots back. Voice: Automatic cannon n°12 destroyed. Misato: that thing is a real flying fortress. What we know about that drill? Makoto: The angel has protracted a giant shield of 17.5-meter diameter. It is perforating the ground directing toward Nerv General Quarter. Misato: When it will get to the base? Makoto: At zero, six minutes, twenty-four seconds of tomorrow? Misato: we have got less than ten hours... What are the conditions of the 01? Ritsuko: The thorax armor has molten to the third stratum... Misato shoots a glare towards Bahamuttone. Ritsuko: We could think us lucky that the main control unit wasn't destroyed, the repairs will be ended in 3 hours Misato: and unit 00? Ritsuko: It won't be problems, but there are a lots visible errors in the feedback, so it not usable in battle. Misato: Where is Shinji? Bahamuttone: I think he is still sedated... Misato glares over Bahamuttone Bahamuttone: I've just shot him an elephant dose of tranquillant, it's nothing. In the mean time Karsten is operated at the lungs. Shinji is woken up with liters of coffee. Shinji: Why I was in the lady's room? Bahamuttone: Mah, I thought it was the best place for you... Shinji: Ehm... Hospital Room Bahamuttone: Ehi Karsten! Karsten: .......... Bahamuttone: How are you? All right? Karsten: ..... Bahamuttone: You know that you are going out in mission, don't you? Here is the plug suit Bahamuttone toss the plug suit on Karsten chest Karsten folds up and coughs blood. Bahamuttone: ops too much effort... Karsten: and.. With whom I'm going...? Bahamuttone: With Shinji... Karsten folds up again. Karsten: And on what? Bahamuttone: the 01 I think. Karsten: You haven't got me anything to eat... Bahamuttone: yes, and do you know the bad news? Karsten: there is one bad also? Bahamuttone: Yes, no beer for the next two months, only plain mineral water. Karsten gets catatonic. Bahamuttone waving a hand in front of Karsten: Yuhuu. Is anybody there? Karsten isn't reacting. Bahamuttone: He is gone...Bah sorry for Rei... Around Karsten begin forming a luminous halo Karsten: Rei?! Bahamuttone: Ehm there is Rei waiting for you in the beer house.... Karsten: WHERE? HOW? WHEN? WHY? Bahamuttone: And how can I know? If you hurry you can catch up with her... Bahamuttone notice a blur of motion get up from the bed, dress up and exit from the door. Bahamuttone peeking from the door: It seems he has got it... While Bahamuttone is going away... Cavernous voice from behind: BAAAAHAMUTTONEEEEEEEERGH!!!! Bahamuttone turning cautiously around: Yes??? What's up? Karsten is holding two strange two-handed swords, one in each hand, his whole body is half-transparent and red flames engulf his head Soul Karsten: GRAAAAAUURRRGH!!!! Bahamuttone flees and Soul Karsten pursue him. Bahamuttone shoots into the briefing room. Soul Karsten follows him Bahamuttone check if the person he is searching is in the room. His gaze pass over Misato, Shinji, Rei, Mako...REI! Bahamuttone: There she is! I'm safe Soul Karsten enters furiously in the room. All the bystander sees him Soul Karsten at the sight of Rei changes back to normality and hides the SoulEdge. Misato: But hasn't the doctor given you twenty days of rest? Karsten: Yes, but I've got better already.... Bahamuttone, can you get out a moment? I've got to talk you in private... Bahamuttone: Why? Karsten: You came... It's not correct to annoy the pilot during the briefing, is it captain? Misato: yes, yes go away... Bahamuttone begins sweating. The two of them exits the room Soul Karsten takes out the Soul Edge again. Bahamuttone fishing out a VHS: I'll sell you for 5000 yen. Soul Karsten: What is it? Grrr... Bahamuttone: Could you put away those swords? They unsettle me... Soul Karsten: they help me in the tractates... I want the VHS free, and I want to know what it is... Bahamuttone: Beh take it, it's a pretty thing.... Ah please don't kill Shinji afterwards... Karsten with two Soul Edge under the arm taking the VHS: I'll see this this evening.... What's about the newbie? Bahamuttone: nothing, nothing, don't mind... Ah can you borrow me that two? I'd like to do an experiment.... Karsten: I'll experiment them on you if the VHS isn't worth 5000 Y Bahamuttone: Relax... it's worth even more... Karsten: Now I'm going back to the bed, the doc has said that I'd better not exert too much. Bahamuttone: If you'd like I can take the Soul Edge home... Karsten: no I'm taking them with me to the hospital, so I can train a bit... Look I already can make them circle around me without touching them Bahamuttone: Ehmm I think I've got to deploy something... where have I put those labels? Karsten: Baha: don't try anything funny or I'll slice you and label you with the barcode of the supermarket... Bahamuttone: mmm Maybe the Swiss knife of the Eva can be of some use.... Or I can find some decent Katana... Briefing room Misato: Well the idea is to shoot the target from great distance. Eva 01 will shoot, while Rei with the 00 will cover him. All clear? Shinji: Yes Rei: ....... Misato: The shoot point is on the Futago mountain. Get ready to the cages. The two Eva get out from the sides of a mountain Shinji: Sniff...What is this smell? Bahamuttone: It's only beer, don't worry... Karsten: It's even good beer The charging of the rifle of Shinji begins... Bahamuttone: Who knows if that contraption will take the load....Ah Kar did you know that they said that it shoot photons? Karsten: They have seen too much Daitarn III.... Bahamuttone: Well if it doesn't burn up and the angel doesn't notice it, it could work.... Shigeru: high-energy reaction in the target! Karsten & Bahamuttone: It noticed.... The angel shoots at the same time of the Eva. The two rays evade themselves with a really strange behavior. Bahamuttone: How can it have done that? Karsten: Shinji got out on the beer odor and has given it the effect. Bahamuttone: and the angel? Karsten: The du Demon is really strong.... The two rays miss their target. The Eva tries to reload but the angel seems to be faster. Shigeru: Another high-energy reaction in the target! The Eva-00 stops the blows with the shield Karsten: Ayanami! Bahamuttone: I think it will not resist... Karsten glares at Bahamuttone. Bahamuttone: I think that if you hurry you can get her out of there... Karsten exit the room Shinji shoots again and succeeds in hitting the angel making it fall. Bahamuttone: That thing falling would have produced more energy than that it was needed to break its A.T.Field so it would have to shift again the Earth axis, make the dinosaurs reappear, level Neo-Tokyo 3 and a lot of other thing it will never do to cover that enormous hole in the plot.... Karsten:.......................................................... .................................................................. .................................................................. .................................................................. .................................................................. .................................................................. ................... Shinji breaks open the cover e takes out the entry plug The LCL shoots out Shinji exits from the Eva and run toward the searing hot entry plug Burning his hand Shinji open the port. Shinji: Aya..* SDOOONG Shinji falls to the ground unconscious thanks to the vigorous blow given to him by Karsten with his trusted Buster sword. Karsten: Ayanami! Karsten take Ayanami crying for the emotion. It rains rice and plumsweet Bahamuttone: KARSTEN, THE INFIRMARY IS NOT IN THAT WAY!!!! You are going to the bedroom. Karsten: I know, cretin. Bahamuttone: I don't think that the captain would agree however do as you like I've not seen you.... Gendo: Where are you going Karsten. Karsten without a flinch: I'm taking the first children to the infirmary. Gendo: It is the other way. Karsten: I'm sorry I've got the way explained by captain Katsuragi. Gendo: I understand. Karsten start walking toward the infirmary