From: Douglass Weeks --------------BA8788A8EE377058FFA940A5 Gospel 1:0 Final Genesis/First Gospel The 17th angel is dead. With its death, the last obstacle to the Instrumentality of Humanity has been removed. There is nothing to prevent the next step in humanity's evolution…or is there? As the citizens of Tokyo-3 attempt to rebuild their shattered city, a new enemy threatens, an enemy more fearsome than even the greatest of the angels… Let the heavens be rent asunder and the gospel of Malachel ring forth. The silence was absolute, the scenario surreal. A boy smiled serenely, his body wrapped in the hand of a purple colossus. Its face was blank, hidden behind layers of metal. Held upon a cross, yellow blood running down to pool on the floor, the figure presided over the scene, thoughts hidden behind a seven-eyed mask. The boy continued smiling, urging the giant to the conclusion that he knew as inevitable, willing the soul inside the giant to glimpse the knowledge he had already assumed. The silence continued. The giant's hand twitched. The silence was briefly broken by a soft splash as the boy's head fell into the blood, smile unabated. The silence returned. Asuka's eyelids slowly lowered, then jerked open. Disorientation overwhelmed her before she was able place herself. She was in one of NERV's recovery wards, the gentle beeps and hums of machines filling the background with white noise—and she wasn't alone. Turning her head was an effort. Her entire body felt weak and she had to struggle for a few moments before even accomplishing the simple feat of sitting up. She held up one hand, amazed by the smooth unbroken skin of her wrist. The event had played itself over and over in her head: her clothes neatly folded and stacked on the chair; the bathtub filled with lukewarm water; the long, slender shard of glass, glinting coldly in the sunlight. The NERV security agent's arrival was a haze; he was a blur before she had fallen into the darkness. She then remembered the other person in the room. Shinji lay in the other bed, his face covered by an oxygen mask, an IV piercing his arm. She rose then immediately sat back down. Her legs felt like they were made of rubber and it took several tries before she was able to stand. She managed to stagger over to his bed, and sat down on the edge of the mattress before her legs dumped her on the floor. A manila folder lay open on the stand next to his bed. Curious, she picked it up. It took her a few minutes before she realized what she was reading: it was a report on Shinji's confrontation with the 17th angel. There were a number of pictures included, and she felt the bile rise in her throat as she saw Kaworu's autopsy report, her unit 02, unit 01 during clean up. 5th child. Her unit 02. The last angel. With sudden understanding she put the folder back down. The 3rd child had emerged from the final battle unhurt, physically. But she knew his psychological limits, had probed them herself a number of times. Asuka remembered his rage after the destruction of unit 03. She had understood what price would probably be exacted in exchange for stopping the Eva/angel, but Shinji had been forced to watch, unable to intervene as unit 01 had crushed the entry plug. To have intentionally killed, even though there was nothing else he could have done…. Asuka reached out and lifted one of Shinji's eyelids. The orb barely fluttered, the pupil contracting only slightly from the light. He was completely catatonic. "Shinji, you dummkopf," she said, without any real heat. She couldn't work up any ire at him. He looked so helpless, so vulnerable. She sat down on the edge of his bed, cradling his head in her lap. Asuka surprised herself by feeling sympathy for him. He was vulnerable now, as he never had been before. He couldn't hide anymore; he had been forced to face life all by himself and was now forced to pay the consequences. She stroked his head, wishing for a moment that he would wake up. She needed someone, anyone to latch on to. Commander Ikari's voice still echoed in her head. She is useless. Even Shinji is better than nothing. I would even put up with his cello. Asuka heard voices coming down the hall. Hurriedly, she put the folder back on the stand and got back into her own bed. "It's an abomination what they put those children through," a female voice came through the door. "I can't say I feel sorry for the brat, but the Commander's son! At least he could visit for more than thirty seconds. They should have given them separate rooms too, but the Commander insisted-!" The nurse's voice broke off as she came through the door, another nurse following behind. Upon seeing Asuka the first nurse blushed bright red. "Ahh…You're awake, good. I'll inform the Commander immediately." The first nurse hurried off as the second checked on Shinji. Asuka could hear her footsteps as they receded down the hall. As the first nurse's footsteps faded, Asuka could hear a heavier, slower tread going in the opposite direction. Fuyutsuki hated the walk across the Commander's office. The distance between the desk and the door was large enough to make crossing the span feel like an effort. It was all part of the power game of course. Another one of the Commander's little psychological one-ups. He stopped before the commander's desk and had to resist the urge to pant, as if he had just run across the floor. "The 2nd child is awake." If the news pleased the Commander, his face didn't alter to show it. "Was the file placed where she would find it?" "Yes, sir." "Good." Fuyutsuki's face twisted with distaste. "Is it really necessary to manipulate them like that?" Commander Ikari gazed back at him levelly. "It was the pilot's ego that made her unusable in the first place. If she can be manipulated into forming dependencies with others, her mental instabilities should be dampened by their proximity." "So you're hoping she'll become dependent on your son? Few would think that you are doing him a favor." "I am hoping that she will eliminate some of his more… inconvenient mental frailties. " "Of course. Even if it does sound more like the concerned father is playing matchmaker." Commander Ikari remained silent. "Construction is continuing on Unit 03. It is running slightly ahead of schedule, so it should be completed by the fifteenth. However, as to a pilot-" Ikari interrupted. "One has been found." "But how? The Marduke report—" "The child received his training under the German Branch." "Him? But I thought he was ruled unsuitable—" "Events are proceeding along lines that neither I nor SEELE have anticipated. I need to keep the old men off balance to ensure that they interfere as little as possible. My scenario, unlike SEELE's, is malleable. I can afford to deviate without sacrificing my—Yui's ultimate goal. SEELE cannot." "Be careful that you do not push them so far that they topple. Do you think that you, or all of humanity for that matter, will stand for long if they fall?" "Are even you beginning to doubt me, Fuyutsuki-sensei?" Ikari asked, stressing the honorific. "I know the precise consequences of what I am attempting. I have not come so far only to falter now." "If you say so. However, considering the experiences that the 3rd child underwent in relation to the 4th and 5th children, I would recommend a bit more caution before adding another pilot." "There is not enough time left for us to delay the project simply because of the frailties of one of the pilots." "He is your son." "Should that make any difference?" "Generation is 80 percent complete; beginning final mitotic stage." Maya Ibuki didn't bother to look up at the announcement. She didn't have time. Schematics for Unit 3 rolled across her screen, reports on its condition, predictions for its outcome; all came flashing across her screen almost faster than she could read. Without pausing she switched programs, replacing Unit 03 with unit 00. The information overload was slightly less: unit 00 had finished regeneration and was being encased within sea blue armor plates. It was amazing that they had been able to regenerate it. All that had been recovered were a few scorched cell samples encased within melted armor plates. Maya doubted that they would have been successful if she had been in charge when the cells underwent modification, causing them to separate and reform the destroyed Eva. But she hadn't been in charge then; Dr. Akagi had. Maya shifted uncomfortably at the thought of Ritsuko. Maya had been promoted to the head of the Science section following Ritsuko's arrest. Disappearance was a more fitting word. No formal charges had been filed; she had gone peacefully with the Section 2 agents when they came for her, and no one had heard from her since. Destroying the dummy plug system gave the Commander a motive for getting rid of Ritsuko. He no longer had a use for her, so she was simply… disposed of. The thought made Maya very uncomfortable. If a doctor as brilliant as Ritsuko had simply been used and discarded, then what value did anyone else have? Especially if the rumors are true that she was sleeping with the Commander. If he would get rid of her, whom won't he abandon? Her screen shifted again, this time displaying the status of the pilots: Rei was fine, Asuka was recovering and would be returning to Major Katsuragi's residence that evening. Shinji however was still catatonic. He had shown no sign of change since they first pulled him out of the entry plug, following the 17th angel's destruction. The thought echoed through her head, refusing to be banished: Whom won't he abandon? Misato Katsuragi found that she had to force herself to open the door to her apartment. She knew that it would still be there. It would have been easier to stay out, to find a bar and drown the world in a bottle, but duty was the cruelest of taskmasters, so she was here again. Once inside, she halfheartedly began to throw away old ramen cups, tidying up in preparation for Asuka's return. The apartment possessed the quiet that made her think of a crouched beast, waiting to spring. Indeed, one did await her, in a manner of speaking. She refused to go near the answering machine, where his message still waited for her. She should have erased it, but the sound of his voice, the meaning of his words…. Every time she listened to Kaji's final words was like sticking a knife in an old wound and twisting, but it was all she had of him. In a way, the pain was good. It was the pain of memory that kept her going. It would be very good to have another person in the apartment again. Pen-Pen was still with the Horakis, so Misato did not even have the small comfort of his presence. It was with a sigh that she again looked at her orders. She was to go to Tokyo 2 and return with the 6th child. The 6th child: another child. He was to be installed in the apartment next door to hers. She briefly considered moving Shinji's belongings over there. Let the boys share an apartment. Give Shinji another person to attach to. Bring Rei to her apartment, instead of letting the girl remain in that squalid decrepit apartment that she currently inhabited. Keep all the eggs safe in the same basket, where she could watch them all. She had to discard the idea. After what she had seen in Central Dogma, she didn't think she would be able to stand extended exposure to the 1st child, much less how Shinji would react to her if—no, when he got out of the hospital. Ritsuko was right when she said I reached my limit. The children are my children, but I am tired. I want to rest, I want to grieve—I want the time to grieve. Oh Kaji, I miss you! Tears fell from Misato's eyes as she walked over to the answering machine and pressed PLAY. Terrence St. John pressed his face against the airplane window, watching the land slide by far below. The plane had to pass over Tokyo 3, and it was with interest that he watched the work crews far below: immense drainage pipes sucking dry the crater created by Unit 00 in its final heroic moments. Gigantic cranes were damming the inlet to the Pacific, forcing the ocean to stay back. Rebuilding Tokyo 3 was all that the U.N talked about now of days. Let its towers again rise into the sky, show everyone that humanity had been tested by fire and emerged even stronger. The Angels were gone. That was the fact that bothered him. If the Angels were gone, why was he needed, why was any of this needed? He had hacked into the German Branch database and found out that construction still continued on the production model Evas and there were plans for three more Evas to be built and operated from NERV Japan. What enemy would they be set against now? A single Eva would be more than enough against any human force and he shuddered to think of them turned against his fellow man. The plane banked as it crossed Tokyo 2. Terrence leaned back in his seat. There was nothing exciting about this. Landing was humdrum boring. It was much more exciting when you were in the cockpit yourself. He had a pilot's license himself and often flew his grandfather's ancient Cessna single prop over the outback. On the horizon, he saw the black grey of thunderheads piling up. He had to admit that this pilot had skill. The plane he was in was an aging dual engine McBoeing, but the pilot set it down with a single barely noticeable jolt. It wasn't hard to find his contact once he got off the plane. There were very few women who matched her beauty, and an even smaller number who did so while wearing a NERV uniform. He walked up to her and bowed in what he thought was the traditional Japanese greeting. "Konichiwa, Major Katsuragi. I am Terrence St. John, 6th child." The major remained silent, her face grave as she led him to her car, a blue compact that looked like it had seen better days. Terence threw his luggage in the back seat, then climbed into the passenger seat, as Misato started the engine and drove out of the airport lot. Terrence let the silence continue for several minutes as the city slid by around them. "So, Major, I have to say that I'm much forward looking to meeting of my fellow pilots." The sentence didn't seem to sound quite right, but he was still trying to grasp the differences between speaking Japanese and English. Major Katsuragi however, didn't seem to notice his mistakes. He frowned as time passed without her answering. From what he had gleaned from her file, she was supposed to have a very extroverted personality and was a very friendly person. Except for right now. He had met rocks more cheerful than she was. "You can call me Misato." "That's good very much Major, er, I mean Misato-chan." Wait, that's very wrong. "I'm sorry, I meant Misato-sempai, no, Misato-san." A smile tugged at the corners of her mouth. "You don't need to include the honorific. Misato will do fine for now." "Thank you, I still haven't quite gotten those figured out. When do you think I'll meet the other pilots?" The small smile vanished from Misato's face. "You've been provided with an apartment next to mine. The 2nd child is currently in residence with myself, along with the 3rd child, who will return once he recovers from his encounter with the 17th angel." "What about the 1st child?" he asked eagerly. He was looking forward to meeting Rei Ayanami, the famous 1st child. For a little while, he had been afraid that he had lost his chance forever, when Unit 00 had self destructed, and he had been greatly relieved upon hearing that she had survived. Terrence wanted to question her more about that incident. Whatever the 17th angel had been, security was tight around it. He had tried to pull a hack on the files about it and it had taken all of his substantial abilities to hide the fact that he had even tried to probe the file, much less access it. However, something in the Major's face made him stop from pressing further. They passed underneath the leading thunderclouds and the car was rocked as it was struck by the full fury of the wind and rain. Neither spoke for the rest of the trip, nor did they speak once the Major pulled up in front of the apartment complex and they carried his suitcases onto the elevator. As they passed the door to Misato's apartment, it suddenly sprang open. Surprised, Terrance dropped his suitcase as Asuka, seated in a wheel chair, rolled onto the walkway. "Misato! You're back!" She stopped as she saw Terrence. "You?" Surprise and incredulity battled in her voice. "You're the 6th child? Mein Gott in Himmel!" "Hello, Ms. Soryu. I assure you, the pleasure is not mine," Terrence said coldly. "You two know each other?" Misato asked, surprised. "We met briefly in Germany when we were younger." Asuka flushed angrily and retreated back into the apartment slamming the door behind her. Terrence continued to his apartment, dumping his suitcase just inside the door. "Thank you very much for your help, Misato. If you don't mind, I'd like to unpack by myself." She left him in the entryway, sparing him one last curious glance before closing the door behind her. As the door shut, Terrence sighed and slid down the wall. He had known who the 2nd child was of course. He knew that he would have to interact with her in the course of his duties. He even had known that he would have to live next to her. He had promised himself that he would be civil. People changed. What had passed between them as children was long past. They had both grown up. Correction. I grew up. She's still a little brat. Misato could hear Asuka swearing angrily in German when she entered the apartment. The wheel chair lay on its side, one wheel spinning lazily. Asuka was trying to pull herself to her feet using one of the chairs. Without warning the chair tipped over, dumping Asuka back on the floor. "Verdammt!" she swore angrily, before righting the chair and trying to stand again. "Let me help, Asuka," Misato said, offering her a hand. Asuka glared back at her. "I'm not helpless. I can do this myself." Misato bit back the urge to argue and went into the kitchen. She opened a cabinet and took out two cups of prepared ramen. She got a beer for herself out of the refrigerator and filled a glass with water for Asuka. She tried to ignore the sounds coming from the other room, the near endless stream of thuds and curses as Asuka tried and failed to stand herself up. Asuka had her knees drawn up to her chest and tears of frustration were leaking from her eyes as Misato reentered the room, balancing dinner in her hands. She set the food on the table, then picked Asuka up and roughly set her in the chair. "I could have done it myself," the 2nd child said petulantly. Misato sighed. "You shouldn't even be out of the wheelchair. You're too weak to be moving around on your own." "I'm fine," Asuka muttered angrily, avoiding Misato's eyes. "Bullshit. When Section 2 dragged you in, you hadn't eaten in more than a week." As half-assed as security had been to let Asuka go in the first place, they had noticed the jagged shard of glass next to the bathtub where they had found her, when they had finally pulled her back in. "I just needed to be alone." Misato let the lie pass. "Well that's fine, but we need you back on your feet. We need you ready to pilot Unit 02 as soon as possible." "Why? You've still got Wonder Girl. Besides, I heard that the 17th was supposed to be the last of the angels. Why do you need me or my doll?" "Your attitude really sucks, Asuka! Rei and the 6th child are our only pilots right now. We've been down to the wire too often. NERV needs you in an Eva yesterday." Asuka sniffed haughtily. "It shows just how much trouble you're in if you're recruiting losers like him to pilot Evas anyway. Besides, you know that Shinji the hero will be there if we really need him." She practically sneered out the boy's name. A tick developed in Misato's cheek, and she flushed angrily. "Now you listen here—" "I'm finished," Asuka interrupted, pushing her plate away from her, and attempting to stand. She tried to walk to her room, but the best she could manage was a half stagger, half crawl. She slammed the door shut behind her, and Misato could hear Asuka's body strike the floor as her legs finally gave out completely. Silently, Misato cleared the table and placed Asuka's wheelchair by her door, before retreating to bed herself. The quiet was unbroken for the rest of the night. The only sound in the hospital room was the hiss of the respirator as it rose and fell. Asuka's breath was harsh in her ears as she looked down at Shinji. He had fallen further into the coma and a bank of machines now stood sentinel around his bed, anchoring the life to his frail body. Her fists clenched and unclenched as she watched him. Hatred boiled up in her mind and the world blanked out as her vision narrowed down to a tunnel that encompassed only his face. All she would have to do is yank out a plug, silence the machines and it would be all over. It would be the end for her as well, but at least she would have ended it. There would be no more humiliation, no more competition. She would be allowed peace at last. She wheeled her chair close to his bed. She had made sure that there were no nurses close by when she had entered the room. No one would be able to intervene until it was to late. Her breathing grew harsher, and it seemed to rasp in her brain, drowning out everything else. One jerk would be all it would take. One swift action to end it all. The world seemed filled by the sound of her breathing. Shinji the hero; Asuka the zero. "Please, stop," she whispered, although it was impossible to tell whether she was speaking to the voice in her head or to her hand as it reached for the power cable. She's useless. "No, I'm not." Launch unit 02. At least it can be a decoy. "Stop." I'm worthless. Nobody needs me. Nobody needs a pilot who can't even control her own Eva. "Shut up!" Die with me, Asuka. Her voice was a whimper. "No." Don't look at that boy, Asuka. You must be strong. She pressed her hands to her ears. "I don't want to die." Die with me, Asuka. Bring the boy. We can all be together. "No!" she sobbed. "I don't want to die! I'm strong!" She's useless. It was then that she looked at Shinji. He looked so frail. His skin was ghostly white, and stretched tight across his face. Before she realized what she was doing, Asuka reached out and ran a finger along his cheek. She tilted his face towards her. Despite the tubes, despite his pale pallor and gaunt features, she could see on his face an expression of… peace. He had finally found it, a place where he was safe. He had run away to a place no one could hurt him. Asuka doubled over, sobs erupting from her throat. "S-S-Shin-ji i-i-is the hero. I'm…the…I'm," her voice lowered to a whisper, "I'm the zero." The tears ran hot and fast down her face. They gathered at a point on her chin, before falling to splash silently against Shinji's face. The train car was painted orange by the fading sun. It rocked gently as it moved, the wheels making a regular clack-clack against the tracks. The sound and the motion were soothing to Shinji. It was peaceful on the train. He sat sprawled over two seats; head tilted back, eyes shut. Why are you here? Shinji's eyes shot open at the sound of the voice. A child was sitting opposite of him. He recognized the child. It was…him! The child was he, but the words were his father's. The child looked up at him. "Why are you here?" Shinji paused before answering, confused by the question. "I'm here because…it's pleasant here?" "Why?" "Because… it's quiet here. Peaceful." "Are you running away?" "NO!" Shinji shouted, "I'm not running away. I'm not running! I'm, I'm, I-I'm…" he trailed off, unable to answer. "You are afraid." "No! I'm not!" "What are you afraid of?" "I'm not afraid of anything!" "Are you afraid of her?" An image of Asuka flashed through his head. "No." "Are you afraid of him?" This time the image was of his father. "No! I don't fear him, I hate him!" "Then what is it that you fear? What is making you run?" "I fear—" Shinji shook his head, refusing to finish the sentence. "What do you fear?" The child asked insistently. He refused to let Shinji break eye contact. "What is it that frightens you?" "I fear," Shinji's voice dropped to a whisper, "I fear pain." Flicker He was now standing by a watermelon patch. Kaji stood next to him, watering can in hand. "Do you hate pain, Shinji?" "Of course I hate pain." "You never want to feel pain ever again, right? That's why you're running away." "I'm sick of the pain." Kaji tilted the watering can, spraying the melons. "And so Shinji Ikari decides that he never again will feel pain. Good for you, Shinji. I'd say I was proud of you, except that you sicken me to my core." Shinji looked down, unable to answer. "I hate you Shinji, because you lie to yourself. You're running away. Do you honestly think that by not confronting your pain it will go away? I never thought you so foolish." He turned to face Shinji. "Pain is as much a part of life as breathing. Life brings pain, but it also brings pleasure. You cannot have one without the other; without the other, you could not tell if you even had the one. If you've known pain and hardship then it is easier to be kind to others, because you have experienced what they have. In it's own way, pain is the driving force behind human interaction. Yet you are seeking an end to pain. To shut yourself off from the world. Is that what you really want?" "I want to die," Shinji whispered. Kaji tilted his head back and laughed. "Aha! Death, the ultimate antithesis of pain. So what you really want is to accept the sweet lady's promise of oblivion? To let death erase all of your pain forever." "Yes," Shinji whispered. "Let me die." Flicker Shinji was seated in Unit 01's cockpit. Through the viewscreen, he could see its arm outstretched, a boy clutched tightly in its hand. "Do you wish for death because you regret?" Kaworu asked, his face still smiling. "Yes." "What do you regret? Killing me?" "Yes." "You regret my death, yet had I lived, I would have killed you all. Shinji, do not cry for me. Only one existence would have survived our encounter, and yours was not the existence that should have died." "You should have lived, not me." Kaworu smiled at him gently. "The one who should have survived is the one who has the will to make it happen." "But I don't want to." Flicker He heard the toilet flush, the bathroom door sliding open and quickly pretended to be asleep. He heard footsteps, then a thump and a flush of air as a body settled next to him. He cracked an eye, then suddenly opened both in amazement. Asuka was next to him, curled up on the mat. His fingers closed convulsively on the buttons of his Walkman and the music blurred backward. She was sound asleep. He watched her for a moment, afraid that she would vanish like mist in the moonlight. Her lips were parted slightly; he leaned forward, eyes intent upon her face. The music whined in his ears, words and chords blurred into incomprehensibility. The universe seemed to narrow, until all that it contained was him and Asuka. He swallowed convulsively and drew his head even closer. Asuka murmured in her sleep. He couldn't understand what she was saying, but then her lips moved slightly, and one word came out clearly. "No." He drew back, startled. She opened her eyes and sat up. "No Shinji, you won't die." He drew his knees up to his chest. "I want to. I want it to end. Why can't I?" Asuka reached around Shinji's head and grabbed a handful of hair. She pulled his head close to hers, forcing him to look her in the eye. He struggled, but her grip was like a vice. Her eyes seemed to pull him in, as if the entire world had vanished except for those two blue eyes. "Because, there are some things that are worth dying for." The music stopped with a snap as the tape hit the beginning. Asuka's eyes dominated his vision, her face inches from his. He could feel her breath as she spoke. "And because, there are some things that are worth living for." SNAP Shinji felt himself hurled away. Asuka, the mat, the room vanished. He was surrounded by blackness, a single point of light shining far over head. The blackness was stifling, filling his nose as he tried to breathe. He struggled wildly, then began to swim upwards towards the light. Voices swirled around, buffeting him as if he were in a vortex of sound. You need the future; it is what you live for. "I want to live!" Shinji shouted. The one who should have survived is the one who has the will to make it happen. If you've known pain and hardship, then it is easier to be kind to others. "I want to live with the pain!" The light grew closer; however, Shinji's limbs were tiring and his lungs burned, screaming for air. Yours is not the existence that should die. There are some things that are worth dying for. "I want to live!" The light almost seemed close enough to touch Thank you Shinji, my life was meaningful. There are some things that are worth living for. "I WILL LIVE!" Shinji screamed as he flew out of the darkness and into the light. Consciousness returned in a rush. The world snapped into focus as he opened his eyes, and he found himself staring up into the fluorescent light of the hospital room. "I hate this ceiling," he whispered. The fate of the human race rests on the shoulders of an unique group of children. Should they fail, then the Heavens save us, for there will be nothing on earth that can. --------------BA8788A8EE377058FFA940A5                                                        Gospel 1:0
                                            Final Genesis/First Gospel
 
     The 17th angel is dead.
    With its death, the last obstacle to the Instrumentality of Humanity has been removed. There is nothing to prevent the next step in humanity's evolution…or is there?
    As the citizens of Tokyo-3 attempt to rebuild their shattered city, a new enemy threatens, an enemy more fearsome than even the greatest of the angels…
 
                                       Let the heavens be rent asunder and the gospel of Malachel ring forth.
 
 

    The silence was absolute, the scenario surreal.
    A boy smiled serenely, his body wrapped in the hand of a purple colossus. Its face was blank, hidden behind layers of metal. Held upon a cross, yellow blood running down to pool on the floor, the figure presided over the scene, thoughts hidden behind a seven-eyed mask.
    The boy continued smiling, urging the giant to the conclusion that he knew as inevitable, willing the soul inside the giant to glimpse the knowledge he had already assumed.
    The silence continued.
    The giant's hand twitched.
    The silence was briefly broken by a soft splash as the boy's head fell into the blood, smile unabated.
    The silence returned.
 
    Asuka's eyelids slowly lowered, then jerked open. Disorientation overwhelmed her before she was able place herself.
She was in one of NERV's recovery wards, the gentle beeps and hums of machines filling the background with white noise—and she wasn't alone.
    Turning her head was an effort. Her entire body felt weak and she had to struggle for a few moments before even accomplishing the simple feat of sitting up. She held up one hand, amazed by the smooth unbroken skin of her wrist. The event had played itself over and over in her head: her clothes neatly folded and stacked on the chair; the bathtub filled with lukewarm water; the long, slender shard of glass, glinting coldly in the sunlight. The NERV security agent's arrival was a haze; he was a blur before she had fallen into the darkness.
    She then remembered the other person in the room. Shinji lay in the other bed, his face covered by an oxygen mask, an IV piercing his arm. She rose then immediately sat back down. Her legs felt like they were made of rubber and it took several tries before she was able to stand. She managed to stagger over to his bed, and sat down on the edge of the mattress before her legs dumped her on the floor. A manila folder lay open on the stand next to his bed. Curious, she picked it up.
    It took her a few minutes before she realized what she was reading: it was a report on Shinji's confrontation with the 17th angel. There were a number of pictures included, and she felt the bile rise in her throat as she saw Kaworu's autopsy report, her unit 02, unit 01 during clean up.
    5th child.
    Her unit 02.
    The last angel.
    With sudden understanding she put the folder back down. The 3rd child had emerged from the final battle unhurt, physically. But she knew his psychological limits, had probed them herself a number of times. Asuka remembered his rage after the destruction of unit 03. She had understood what price would probably be exacted in exchange for stopping the Eva/angel, but Shinji had been forced to watch, unable to intervene as unit 01 had crushed the entry plug. To have intentionally killed, even though there was nothing else he could have done….
    Asuka reached out and lifted one of Shinji's eyelids. The orb barely fluttered, the pupil contracting only slightly from the light. He was completely catatonic.
    "Shinji, you dummkopf," she said, without any real heat. She couldn't work up any ire at him. He looked so helpless, so vulnerable.
    She sat down on the edge of his bed, cradling his head in her lap. Asuka surprised herself by feeling sympathy for him. He was vulnerable now, as he never had been before. He couldn't hide anymore; he had been forced to face life all by himself and was now forced to pay the consequences.
    She stroked his head, wishing for a moment that he would wake up. She needed someone, anyone to latch on to.     Commander Ikari's voice still echoed in her head. She is useless.
    Even Shinji is better than nothing. I would even put up with his cello.
    Asuka heard voices coming down the hall. Hurriedly, she put the folder back on the stand and got back into her own bed.
    "It's an abomination what they put those children through," a female voice came through the door. "I can't say I feel sorry for the brat, but the Commander's son! At least he could visit for more than thirty seconds. They should have given them separate rooms too, but the Commander insisted-!" The nurse's voice broke off as she came through the door, another nurse following behind. Upon seeing Asuka the first nurse blushed bright red. "Ahh…You're awake, good. I'll inform the Commander immediately." The first nurse hurried off as the second checked on Shinji. Asuka could hear her footsteps as they receded down the hall.
    As the first nurse's footsteps faded, Asuka could hear a heavier, slower tread going in the opposite direction.
 
    Fuyutsuki hated the walk across the Commander's office. The distance between the desk and the door was large enough to make crossing the span feel like an effort. It was all part of the power game of course. Another one of the Commander's little psychological one-ups.
    He stopped before the commander's desk and had to resist the urge to pant, as if he had just run across the floor. "The 2nd child is awake."
    If the news pleased the Commander, his face didn't alter to show it. "Was the file placed where she would find it?"
    "Yes, sir."
    "Good."
    Fuyutsuki's face twisted with distaste. "Is it really necessary to manipulate them like that?"
    Commander Ikari gazed back at him levelly. "It was the pilot's ego that made her unusable in the first place. If she can be manipulated into forming dependencies with others, her mental instabilities should be dampened by their proximity."
    "So you're hoping she'll become dependent on your son? Few would think that you are doing him a favor."
    "I am hoping that she will eliminate some of his more… inconvenient mental frailties. "
    "Of course. Even if it does sound more like the concerned father is playing matchmaker."
    Commander Ikari remained silent.
    "Construction is continuing on Unit 03. It is running slightly ahead of schedule, so it should be completed by the fifteenth. However, as to a pilot-"
    Ikari interrupted. "One has been found."
    "But how? The Marduke report—"
    "The child received his training under the German Branch."
    "Him? But I thought he was ruled unsuitable—"
    "Events are proceeding along lines that neither I nor SEELE have anticipated. I need to keep the old men off balance to ensure that they interfere as little as possible. My scenario, unlike SEELE's, is malleable. I can afford to deviate without sacrificing my—Yui's ultimate goal. SEELE cannot."
    "Be careful that you do not push them so far that they topple. Do you think that you, or all of humanity for that matter, will stand for long if they fall?"
    "Are even you beginning to doubt me, Fuyutsuki-sensei?" Ikari asked, stressing the honorific. "I know the precise consequences of what I am attempting. I have not come so far only to falter now."
    "If you say so. However, considering the experiences that the 3rd child underwent in relation to the 4th and 5th children, I would recommend a bit more caution before adding another pilot."
    "There is not enough time left for us to delay the project simply because of the frailties of one of the pilots."
    "He is your son."
    "Should that make any difference?"
 
    "Generation is 80 percent complete; beginning final mitotic stage."
    Maya Ibuki didn't bother to look up at the announcement. She didn't have time. Schematics for Unit 3 rolled across her screen, reports on its condition, predictions for its outcome; all came flashing across her screen almost faster than she could read. Without pausing she switched programs, replacing Unit 03 with unit 00. The information overload was slightly less: unit 00 had finished regeneration and was being encased within sea blue armor plates. It was amazing that they had been able to regenerate it. All that had been recovered were a few scorched cell samples encased within melted armor plates. Maya doubted that they would have been successful if she had been in charge when the cells underwent modification, causing them to separate and reform the destroyed Eva. But she hadn't been in charge then; Dr. Akagi had.
    Maya shifted uncomfortably at the thought of Ritsuko. Maya had been promoted to the head of the Science section following Ritsuko's arrest. Disappearance was a more fitting word. No formal charges had been filed; she had gone peacefully with the Section 2 agents when they came for her, and no one had heard from her since. Destroying the dummy plug system gave the Commander a motive for getting rid of Ritsuko. He no longer had a use for her, so she was simply… disposed of. The thought made Maya very uncomfortable. If a doctor as brilliant as Ritsuko had simply been used and discarded, then what value did anyone else have? Especially if the rumors are true that she was sleeping with the Commander. If he would get rid of her, whom won't he abandon?
    Her screen shifted again, this time displaying the status of the pilots: Rei was fine, Asuka was recovering and would be returning to Major Katsuragi's residence that evening. Shinji however was still catatonic. He had shown no sign of change since they first pulled him out of the entry plug, following the 17th angel's destruction.
    The thought echoed through her head, refusing to be banished: Whom won't he abandon?
 
    Misato Katsuragi found that she had to force herself to open the door to her apartment. She knew that it would still be there. It would have been easier to stay out, to find a bar and drown the world in a bottle, but duty was the cruelest of taskmasters, so she was here again.
    Once inside, she halfheartedly began to throw away old ramen cups, tidying up in preparation for Asuka's return. The apartment possessed the quiet that made her think of a crouched beast, waiting to spring. Indeed, one did await her, in a manner of speaking.
    She refused to go near the answering machine, where his message still waited for her. She should have erased it, but the sound of his voice, the meaning of his words…. Every time she listened to Kaji's final words was like sticking a knife in an old wound and twisting, but it was all she had of him. In a way, the pain was good. It was the pain of memory that kept her going.
It would be very good to have another person in the apartment again. Pen-Pen was still with the Horakis, so Misato did not even have the small comfort of his presence.
    It was with a sigh that she again looked at her orders. She was to go to Tokyo 2 and return with the 6th child. The 6th child: another child. He was to be installed in the apartment next door to hers. She briefly considered moving Shinji's belongings over there. Let the boys share an apartment. Give Shinji another person to attach to. Bring Rei to her apartment, instead of  letting the girl remain in that squalid decrepit apartment that she currently inhabited. Keep all the eggs safe in the same basket, where she could watch them all. She had to discard the idea. After what she had seen in Central Dogma, she didn't think she would be able to stand extended exposure to the 1st child, much less how Shinji would react to her if—no, when he got out of the hospital.
    Ritsuko was right when she said I reached my limit. The children are my children, but I am tired. I want to rest, I want to grieve—I want the time to grieve. Oh Kaji, I miss you!
    Tears fell from Misato's eyes as she walked over to the answering machine and pressed PLAY.
 
    Terrence St. John pressed his face against the airplane window, watching the land slide by far below. The plane had to pass over Tokyo 3, and it was with interest that he watched the work crews far below: immense drainage pipes sucking dry the crater created by Unit 00 in its final heroic moments. Gigantic cranes were damming the inlet to the Pacific, forcing the ocean to stay back. Rebuilding Tokyo 3 was all that the U.N talked about now of days. Let its towers again rise into the sky, show everyone that humanity had been tested by fire and emerged even stronger. The Angels were gone.
    That was the fact that bothered him. If the Angels were gone, why was he needed, why was any of this needed? He had hacked into the German Branch database and found out that construction still continued on the production model Evas and there were plans for three more Evas to be built and operated from NERV Japan. What enemy would they be set against now? A single Eva would be more than enough against any human force and he shuddered to think of them turned against his fellow man.
    The plane banked as it crossed Tokyo 2. Terrence leaned back in his seat. There was nothing exciting about this. Landing was humdrum boring. It was much more exciting when you were in the cockpit yourself. He had a pilot's license himself and often flew his grandfather's ancient Cessna single prop over the outback.
    On the horizon, he saw the black grey of thunderheads piling up.
    He had to admit that this pilot had skill. The plane he was in was an aging dual engine McBoeing, but the pilot set it down with a single barely noticeable jolt.
    It wasn't hard to find his contact once he got off the plane. There were very few women who matched her beauty, and an even smaller number who did so while wearing a NERV uniform.
    He walked up to her and bowed in what he thought was the traditional Japanese greeting. "Konichiwa, Major Katsuragi. I am Terrence St. John, 6th child."
    The major remained silent, her face grave as she led him to her car, a blue compact that looked like it had seen better days.
Terence threw his luggage in the back seat, then climbed into the passenger seat, as Misato started the engine and drove out of the airport lot.
    Terrence let the silence continue for several minutes as the city slid by around them. "So, Major, I have to say that I'm much forward looking to meeting of my fellow pilots." The sentence didn't seem to sound quite right, but he was still trying to grasp the differences between speaking Japanese and English. Major Katsuragi however, didn't seem to notice his mistakes.
    He frowned as time passed without her answering. >From what he had gleaned from her file, she was supposed to have a very extroverted personality and was a very friendly person. Except for right now. He had met rocks more cheerful than she was.
    "You can call me Misato."
    "That's good very much Major, er, I mean Misato-chan." Wait, that's very wrong. "I'm sorry, I meant Misato-sempai, no, Misato-san."
    A smile tugged at the corners of her mouth. "You don't need to include the honorific. Misato will do fine for now."
    "Thank you, I still haven't quite gotten those figured out. When do you think I'll meet the other pilots?"
    The small smile vanished from Misato's face. "You've been provided with an apartment next to mine. The 2nd child is currently in residence with myself, along with the 3rd child, who will return once he recovers from his encounter with the 17th angel."
    "What about the 1st child?" he asked eagerly. He was looking forward to meeting Rei Ayanami, the famous 1st child. For a little while, he had been afraid that he had lost his chance forever, when Unit 00 had self destructed, and he had been greatly relieved upon hearing that she had survived.
    Terrence wanted to question her more about that incident. Whatever the 17th angel had been, security was tight around it. He had tried to pull a hack on the files about it and it had taken all of his substantial abilities to hide the fact that he had even tried to probe the file, much less access it. However, something in the Major's face made him stop from pressing further.
    They passed underneath the leading thunderclouds and the car was rocked as it was struck by the full fury of the wind and rain. Neither spoke for the rest of the trip, nor did they speak once the Major pulled up in front of the apartment complex and they carried his suitcases onto the elevator.
    As they passed the door to Misato's apartment, it suddenly sprang open. Surprised, Terrance dropped his suitcase as Asuka, seated in a wheel chair, rolled onto the walkway.
    "Misato! You're back!" She stopped as she saw Terrence. "You?" Surprise and incredulity battled in her voice. "You're the 6th child? Mein Gott in Himmel!"
    "Hello, Ms. Soryu. I assure you, the pleasure is not mine," Terrence said coldly.
    "You two know each other?" Misato asked, surprised.
    "We met briefly in Germany when we were younger."
    Asuka flushed angrily and retreated back into the apartment slamming the door behind her. Terrence continued to his apartment, dumping his suitcase just inside the door. "Thank you very much for your help, Misato. If you don't mind, I'd like to unpack by myself."
    She left him in the entryway, sparing him one last curious glance before closing the door behind her.
    As the door shut, Terrence sighed and slid down the wall. He had known who the 2nd child was of course. He knew that he would have to interact with her in the course of his duties. He even had known that he would have to live next to her. He had promised himself that he would be civil. People changed. What had passed between them as children was long past. They had both grown up. Correction. I grew up. She's still a little brat.
 
    Misato could hear Asuka swearing angrily in German when she entered the apartment. The wheel chair lay on its side, one wheel spinning lazily. Asuka was trying to pull herself to her feet using one of the chairs.
    Without warning the chair tipped over, dumping Asuka back on the floor. "Verdammt!" she swore angrily, before righting the chair and trying to stand again.
    "Let me help, Asuka," Misato said, offering her a hand.
    Asuka glared back at her. "I'm not helpless. I can do this myself."
    Misato bit back the urge to argue and went into the kitchen. She opened a cabinet and took out two cups of prepared ramen. She got a beer for herself out of the refrigerator and filled a glass with water for Asuka. She tried to ignore the sounds coming from the other room, the near endless stream of thuds and curses as Asuka tried and failed to stand herself up.
Asuka had her knees drawn up to her chest and tears of frustration were leaking from her eyes as Misato reentered the room, balancing dinner in her hands. She set the food on the table, then picked Asuka up and roughly set her in the chair.
    "I could have done it myself," the 2nd child said petulantly.
    Misato sighed. "You shouldn't even be out of the wheelchair. You're too weak to be moving around on your own."
    "I'm fine," Asuka muttered angrily, avoiding Misato's eyes.
    "Bullshit. When Section 2 dragged you in, you hadn't eaten in more than a week." As half-assed as security had been to let Asuka go in the first place, they had noticed the jagged shard of glass next to the bathtub where they had found her, when they had finally pulled her back in.
    "I just needed to be alone."
    Misato let the lie pass. "Well that's fine, but we need you back on your feet. We need you ready to pilot Unit 02 as soon as possible."
    "Why? You've still got Wonder Girl. Besides, I heard that the 17th was supposed to be the last of the angels. Why do you need me or my doll?"
    "Your attitude really sucks, Asuka! Rei and the 6th child are our only pilots right now. We've been down to the wire too often. NERV needs you in an Eva yesterday."
    Asuka sniffed haughtily. "It shows just how much trouble you're in if you're recruiting losers like him to pilot Evas anyway. Besides, you know that Shinji the hero will be there if we really need him." She practically sneered out the boy's name.
A tick developed in Misato's cheek, and she flushed angrily. "Now you listen here—"
    "I'm finished," Asuka interrupted, pushing her plate away from her, and attempting to stand. She tried to walk to her room, but the best she could manage was a half stagger, half crawl. She slammed the door shut behind her, and Misato could hear     Asuka's body strike the floor as her legs finally gave out completely.
    Silently, Misato cleared the table and placed Asuka's wheelchair by her door, before retreating to bed herself.
    The quiet was unbroken for the rest of the night.
 
    The only sound in the hospital room was the hiss of the respirator as it rose and fell. Asuka's breath was harsh in her ears as she looked down at Shinji. He had fallen further into the coma and a bank of machines now stood sentinel around his bed, anchoring the life to his frail body.
    Her fists clenched and unclenched as she watched him. Hatred boiled up in her mind and the world blanked out as her vision narrowed down to a tunnel that encompassed only his face. All she would have to do is yank out a plug, silence the machines and it would be all over. It would be the end for her as well, but at least she would have ended it. There would be no more humiliation, no more competition. She would be allowed peace at last. She wheeled her chair close to his bed. She had made sure that there were no nurses close by when she had entered the room. No one would be able to intervene until it was to late.
    Her breathing grew harsher, and it seemed to rasp in her brain, drowning out everything else.
    One jerk would be all it would take.
    One swift action to end it all.
    The world seemed filled by the sound of her breathing.
    Shinji the hero; Asuka the zero.
    "Please, stop," she whispered, although it was impossible to tell whether she was speaking to the voice in her head or to her hand as it reached for the power cable.
    She's useless.
    "No, I'm not."
    Launch unit 02. At least it can be a decoy.
    "Stop."
    I'm worthless. Nobody needs me. Nobody needs a pilot who can't even control her own Eva.
    "Shut up!"
    Die with me, Asuka.
    Her voice was a whimper. "No."
    Don't look at that boy, Asuka. You must be strong.
    She pressed her hands to her ears. "I don't want to die."
    Die with me, Asuka. Bring the boy. We can all be together.
    "No!" she sobbed. "I don't want to die! I'm strong!"
    She's useless.
    It was then that she looked at Shinji.
    He looked so frail. His skin was ghostly white, and stretched tight across his face. Before she realized what she was doing, Asuka reached out and ran a finger along his cheek. She tilted his face towards her. Despite the tubes, despite his pale pallor and gaunt features, she could see on his face an expression of… peace.
    He had finally found it, a place where he was safe. He had run away to a place no one could hurt him.
    Asuka doubled over, sobs erupting from her throat.
    "S-S-Shin-ji i-i-is the hero. I'm…the…I'm," her voice lowered to a whisper, "I'm the zero."
    The tears ran hot and fast down her face. They gathered at a point on her chin, before falling to splash silently against Shinji's face.
 
    The train car was painted orange by the fading sun. It rocked gently as it moved, the wheels making a regular clack-clack against the tracks.
    The sound and the motion were soothing to Shinji. It was peaceful on the train. He sat sprawled over two seats; head tilted back, eyes shut.
    Why are you here?
    Shinji's eyes shot open at the sound of the voice. A child was sitting opposite of him. He recognized the child. It was…him!
    The child was he, but the words were his father's.
    The child looked up at him. "Why are you here?"
    Shinji paused before answering, confused by the question. "I'm here because…it's pleasant here?"
    "Why?"
    "Because… it's quiet here. Peaceful."
    "Are you running away?"
    "NO!" Shinji shouted, "I'm not running away. I'm not running! I'm, I'm, I-I'm…" he trailed off, unable to answer.
    "You are afraid."
    "No! I'm not!"
    "What are you afraid of?"
    "I'm not afraid of anything!"
    "Are you afraid of her?" An image of Asuka flashed through his head.
    "No."
    "Are you afraid of him?" This time the image was of his father.
    "No! I don't fear him, I hate him!"
    "Then what is it that you fear? What is making you run?"
    "I fear—" Shinji shook his head, refusing to finish the sentence.
    "What do you fear?" The child asked insistently. He refused to let Shinji break eye contact. "What is it that frightens you?"
    "I fear," Shinji's voice dropped to a whisper, "I fear pain."
    Flicker
    He was now standing by a watermelon patch. Kaji stood next to him, watering can in hand. "Do you hate pain, Shinji?"
    "Of course I hate pain."
    "You never want to feel pain ever again, right? That's why you're running away."
    "I'm sick of the pain."
    Kaji tilted the watering can, spraying the melons. "And so Shinji Ikari decides that he never again will feel pain. Good for you, Shinji. I'd say I was proud of you, except that you sicken me to my core."
    Shinji looked down, unable to answer.
    "I hate you Shinji, because you lie to yourself. You're running away. Do you honestly think that by not confronting your pain it will go away? I never thought you so foolish."
    He turned to face Shinji. "Pain is as much a part of life as breathing. Life brings pain, but it also brings pleasure. You cannot have one without the other; without the other, you could not tell if you even had the one. If you've known pain and hardship then it is easier to be kind to others, because you have experienced what they have. In it's own way, pain is the driving force behind human interaction. Yet you are seeking an end to pain. To shut yourself off from the world. Is that what you really want?"
    "I want to die," Shinji whispered.
    Kaji tilted his head back and laughed. "Aha! Death, the ultimate antithesis of pain. So what you really want is to accept the sweet lady's promise of oblivion? To let death erase all of your pain forever."
    "Yes," Shinji whispered. "Let me die."
    Flicker
    Shinji was seated in Unit 01's cockpit. Through the viewscreen, he could see its arm outstretched, a boy clutched tightly in its hand.
    "Do you wish for death because you regret?" Kaworu asked, his face still smiling.
    "Yes."
    "What do you regret? Killing me?"
    "Yes."
    "You regret my death, yet had I lived, I would have killed you all. Shinji, do not cry for me. Only one existence would have survived our encounter, and yours was not the existence that should have died."
    "You should have lived, not me."
    Kaworu smiled at him gently. "The one who should have survived is the one who has the will to make it happen."
    "But I don't want to."
    Flicker
    He heard the toilet flush, the bathroom door sliding open and quickly pretended to be asleep. He heard footsteps, then a thump and a flush of air as a body settled next to him. He cracked an eye, then suddenly opened both in amazement. Asuka was next to him, curled up on the mat. His fingers closed convulsively on the buttons of his Walkman and the music blurred backward.
    She was sound asleep. He watched her for a moment, afraid that she would vanish like mist in the moonlight. Her lips were parted slightly; he leaned forward, eyes intent upon her face. The music whined in his ears, words and chords blurred into incomprehensibility. The universe seemed to narrow, until all that it contained was him and Asuka. He swallowed convulsively and drew his head even closer.
    Asuka murmured in her sleep. He couldn't understand what she was saying, but then her lips moved slightly, and one word came out clearly. "No."
    He drew back, startled. She opened her eyes and sat up. "No Shinji, you won't die."
    He drew his knees up to his chest. "I want to. I want it to end. Why can't I?"
    Asuka reached around Shinji's head and grabbed a handful of hair. She pulled his head close to hers, forcing him to look her in the eye. He struggled, but her grip was like a vice.
    Her eyes seemed to pull him in, as if the entire world had vanished except for those two blue eyes.
    "Because, there are some things that are worth dying for."
    The music stopped with a snap as the tape hit the beginning. Asuka's eyes dominated his vision, her face inches from his. He could feel her breath as she spoke. "And because, there are some things that are worth living for."
SNAP
    Shinji felt himself hurled away. Asuka, the mat, the room vanished. He was surrounded by blackness, a single point of light shining far over head. The blackness was stifling, filling his nose as he tried to breathe. He struggled wildly, then began to swim upwards towards the light.
    Voices swirled around, buffeting him as if he were in a vortex of sound.
    You need the future; it is what you live for.
    "I want to live!" Shinji shouted.
    The one who should have survived is the one who has the will to make it happen.
    If you've known pain and hardship, then it is easier to be kind to others.
    "I want to live with the pain!"
    The light grew closer; however, Shinji's limbs were tiring and his lungs burned, screaming for air.
    Yours is not the existence that should die.
    There are some things that are worth dying for.
    "I want to live!" The light almost seemed close enough to touch
    Thank you Shinji, my life was meaningful.
    There are some things that are worth living for.
    "I WILL LIVE!" Shinji screamed as he flew out of the darkness and into the light.
 
    Consciousness returned in a rush. The world snapped into focus as he opened his eyes, and he found himself staring up into  the fluorescent light of the hospital room.
    "I hate this ceiling," he whispered.

The fate of the human race rests on the shoulders of an unique group of children. Should they fail, then the Heavens save us, for there will be nothing on earth that can. --------------BA8788A8EE377058FFA940A5--