From: Jonathan Gaters ************************************************ Title: Death, Rebirth, & Everything In Between Author: Jonathan "Katarn" Gaters E-mail: KatarnX2B@NetZero.net Cause: Something I read on the FFML Time: 20:58 ************************************************ ************************************************ Public Service Announcement: Red meat sits in your colon for fifteen years. Poultry is more likely to become infected with Salmenela. Pork may have tape worms infesting it. For your health, try snake! Snake: The other yellow meat. ************************************************ ------------------------------------------------------------------------ SCENE: Shinji is sitting at the breakfast table eating cereal. Anouncer: Hey Shinji. Shinji: Oh hey. Anouncer: What are you eating? Shinji: Oh, my favorite cereal, "Spinless Wimp". Anouncer: Would you be willing to try a new cereal? Shinji: Well, okay. Don't expect too much though. I only like "Spineless Wimp". (The Anouncer places a bowl of cereal in front of Shinji.) (Shinji cautiously take a spoonful of the cereal into him mouth.) Shinji: Hey! This isn't that bad! In fact, it's _better_ than my other cereal! What's the name of this stuff?! Anouncer: That's the new cereal "Nut 'n' Bitch", from the makers of "Whities", the Alabama Cereal Co.! Shinji: Gee thanks! I've just found my new favorite cereal! Anouncer: (With a hearty chuckle) No problem Shinji. Remember, that's "Nut 'n' Bitch" cereal. --2 minutes later (Asuka comes out of the bathroom, dressed in her school uniform.) Asuka: Hey Shinji, whatcha eatin'? ------------------------------------------------------------------------ SCENE: Tokyo-3 Jr. High School 707. Class 2-A. (Shinji walks in with his right eye and his lower lip a deep shade of purple.) Shinji: (Sitting down ruffly in his chair and pouting) Stupid cereal. End