yoner@highlandgrey.com (Luna Ayanami)


Just thought I'd see how everyone out there in otaku-world likes this.
Happy reading! ^_^ --Luna


Neon Genesis Evangelion: At the End of the World

Neon Genesis Evangelion is copyrighted by GAINAX. We must all bow down and
grovel before GAINAX for letting us see this wonderful show. This story
operates on a different storyline from the one depicted in Japan and I
apologize for the liberties I have taken with the concept of the show. The
characters are my own, and I created the environment and situations they
live in.


Prologue

No one could remember exactly how long it had been since the last battle
between the Angels and the EVA units. But the world had been thrown into
turmoil afterwards, and it had not yet recovered.

Land was a high commodity, since so much had been ruined when the last
attack had come. It was coveted jealously by those who held it, and was
sold at high rates to those who wanted it. Politics played a high role in
the world structure...where politics could be played. Countries were
divided by anarchy in poor areas where the land was ruined beyond hope to
high dictatorship in areas where the land was richer.

Beneath the City of Night, a secret waited patiently for discovery.

Tokyo-3 had been hit the worst by the final attack, and it now lay in ruins
beneath an eternal cloud that boiled blackly. It poured flash floods from
its dark depths, lightning erupted constantly from one part or another. No
one dared to go near it, much less in it, for very long, for it was worth
your life to stay too long.

Signs still hang, warning of the danger.

One man, Adam Carson, a travelling man who roamed the world, looking for
salvages that would be worth a lot of money, dared to enter the ruins of
Tokyo-3. He was inside for months, and when he emerged, he barely escaped
for his life. But he had what he had been looking for...evidence of NERV
and the infamous EVA units.

The Night is watching.

Adam Carson has kept the secret of Tokyo-3 for twenty years. Now he has the
money he needs to carry out his plan...

The secret uncovered.

He plans the excavate NERV headquarters and resurrect the Evangelion units.

The secret awakes.



Chapter 1

For as long as I can remember, I have lived in darkness.

It wasn't always physical darkness. Always, I could see the sun, play
outside, do things other kids could do... but I didn't have a home, no
permanent place to stay, no sure source of food, and I couldn't ever
remember having parents. I lived in the slums of the onlt prosperous city
in Japan, and I lived on my own.

I met Tashi when i was around six years old. I was lost, tired and very
very sick. I somehow wandered into his yard while he was playing outside
and fell down at his feet. He ran to get his mother, and they took me in
until I got better. Afterwards, I had to go back to the streets.

Tashi managed to sneak away every now and then, more often as we both got
older. He brought me food and protected me from the various bullies that
terrorized the children of the city. He took care of me whenever I was sick
or was injured. He always snuck me into his house when it was stormy
outside and let me stay in the basement for as long as he could get away
with. His parents didn't approve of his association with me, though I could
never figure out why.

He was always nice to me. When he let me stay in his basement, he always
had a bed for me, even though it was lumpy and uncomfortable, had no
pillows and only a small, thin blanket that didn't do much good. He came
and stayed with me in the bed, letting me use him as a pillow and it was
warmer that way too. He had treats for me always, usually a cookie or
something similar. I always looked forward to seeing him.

Then one day, when I was perhaps eight or nine years old, Tashi was
visiting me in the slums and was tending to my badly scraped knee when some
men came through and rounded up all the children they could find, including
me and Tashi. He couldn't get away, and I could tell that he was worried
about getting home. But he took my hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze
and kept us together as the men pressed more and more children in around
us. Frightened though I was, Tashi was there by my side, and I had absolute
trust in his ability to make things better for me.

The men seperated us after a time, and I was both sad and scared to be
seperated from my only friend, but I knew he wouldn't approve of me if I
was to break down and show weakness to these men, so I held up a brave
front, though inside I was shaking like a leaf on a tree in a strong wind.

It was weeks before I saw him again. I had been taken to several different
buildings and had been poked and prodded by piles of men and women in white
coats with cold instruments and big needles. I had been tagged with a
bracelet around my wrist which displayed my name, approximate age, blood
type and a few other things, none of which I could read. I was illiterate,
and had been for a long time.

When I was reunited with Tashi, it was at the City of Night, Tokyo-3 and I
thought it was hell.

There was no sun, only the big black cloud that rumbled threateningly
overhead. For some reason, that scared me more than anything I had ever
been through could.

We were taken to some underground bunkers that were dark and cold and wet.
I could hear the sound of small feet skittering, and several brushed
against my bare feet and legs. I was shivering and cold, and I clung to
Tashi in fear.

That night, as we lay in our bunks, the men came again, and they told us
what we were doing here, and the next day, we began the hard task of
excavating the city.



Chapter 2

I was almost fourteen when we hit the jackpot.

Tashi and I had been working together since we had come here, five years
earlier. We were a good team. We helped move out more stuff than any other
team, and we also uncovered more artifacts than anyone else.

After we had been brought to Tokyo-3, the leaders had chained us at the
wrist in pairs. I was fortunate enough to get chained to Tashi; there was
no one in the entire group I could have stood being shackled for very long,
save him. We never talked much, but we never had to. I always knew when he
needed my help, and he knew my need in return.

We were the ones to discover the lost NERV headquarters. The truth was, we
had known where it was for months, but had never bothered to tell the
leaders. We both felt, in those rare moments where we did talk, that the
people who were holding us here had no right to the secrets buried beneath
the ruins of the city. So we just never mentioned the huge building we had
found. Whenever we could, we would go back to the site and uncover a little
more.

I had thought that the discovery of HQ was a big deal, but it was the find
of several months later that shadowed it all in comparison.

We were digging around a large, long shaft when, at the bottom, I could see
a large, covered object at the bottom. My light wasn't powerful enough, so
I asked Tashi if we could perhaps get a little closer. He shrugged and
replied with, "Why not?" So we took our rope, attached one end to a big
heavy bar right next to the shaft, and then unlocked our chains, as we had
learned long ago.

It was kind of scary. Tashi looked at me soberly for a moment, then said,
"You go first." I nodded in reply, hooking my light over my shoulder. Then
I got myself into the shaft with a good hold on the rope and slid down
easily. I jumped off and landed uneasily.

The object was so uneven. I walked across the top unsteadily, shining my
light this way and that, trying to see the best way to lift the covering.
Experimentally, I lifted a fold of it that seemed to be stretched between
two seperate points on it. "It's cloth," I said, startled, and let it fall
back into place.

"Can you pull it off?" Tashi asked, sliding down to my level.

"I can try," I replied doubtfully. I couldn't see to the bottom of the
object, or what it was standing on, if anything, so I guessed that the
covering was awfully big. Still, I handed Tashi the light, which he
attached to his vest and we began to muscle the covering off.

It took awhile and afterwards, I threw it off the other side. It slide off
with a hiss that seemed far too loud in the darkness, and I sat for a
moment to rest. I was tired. There had been so much to pull up the one side
and drop off the other...

"Mei...look," Tashi said quietly, pointing the light at a spot near where I
was sitting.

I looked...and nearly fell off the object.

Tashi had taught me how to read a couple years ago. I still wan't very
good, but if I went slowly, I could read nearly anything. This object...it
was covered in dust and the gods-knew-what-else, but the colours were still
visible, and so was the lettering. Still, I had to wipe off a good portion
before I could make out the words clearly.

The leaders had told us what we were to be looking for. And I was sitting
on it.

There, now wiped clear and visible even with the comparitively dim
flashlight, was yellow and black striped warning markings on a purple body,
along with these words:

Warning: EVA Entry Plug Access. Do Not Use Unless in Case of Emergency.

Beside it was big yellow lettering: EVA UNIT-01

I didn't know what to think. Here I was, sitting on a lost EVA unit,
something the leaders had been searching for since we had gotten here, and
probably since before then too. "What are we going to do?" I asked.

Tashi shrugged, scattering the light for a moment. "Two things," he said
after a moment, centering the light on the lettering again. "We either tell
the leaders, or we keep this to ourselves."

I snorted, feeling myself return a little bit. "Do you...do you think we
could...you know...activate it?" I asked, looking up at Tashi.

He looked thoughtful for a long moment. "We could...if we knew how."

I sighed and looked down again at the purple body beneath me. "I wonder how
you open it up...?" I asked myself. I got to my knees on the back and ran
my fingers lightly over the yellow and black striped panel. I didn't think
I had hit anything, but it made a creaking sound and slid open a crack.
"Whoa, what'd I touch?" I said, removing my hands hurriedly.

Tashi knelt beside me. He looked thoughtfully at the panel for a moment.
"There," he said at last, pointing at a small button, nearly hidden on the
side of the panel. "Press that again."

I pressed the button and the panel slid open a bit more. Inside, we could
see two more buttons. So I pressed the button one more time, and as the
panel slipped open a bit more, Tashi stuck his fingers in between the
panel's edges and forced it open all the way. Then he picked up the light
again and shone it inside. I leaned over and bumped my head with Tashi's as
he also leaned in for a closer look. I pulled back automatically and let
him inspect it.

"Hmmm," he said thoughtfully. "I think we push this one here..." He pressed
the topmost button, but nothing happened. He pushed it again after a few
moments, and then frowned thoughtfully. "I don't know -- " He stopped as
the head behind us groaned and jerkily slid forward. There was a larger
panel directly underneath us, and it moved upward, throwing us off-balance.
Tashi immeadiately laid himself flat against the panel and caught hold of
me as I started to slip off, catching hold of my waist and pulling me in
close beside him. "Lay flat," he ordered roughly in my ear. I did as he
said, flattening myself out next to him and hanging on tight.

The panel stopped moving, and we lay still for a few more minutes to make
sure that it wasn't going to move anymore. Then Tashi got up and carefully
crawled on all fours to the edge of the panel and looked down over it.

"Come see this, Mei," he said, motioning with one hand for me to come
closer. I crawled closer and peered over the edge.

"Wow!" I exclaimed. "It's hollow!"

"There must be something else that goes in there...," Tashi mused, lying
flat again. His eyes were distant.

"Tashi, think! What if there are more of these? Wouldn't that be neat!" I
was really too excited to pay attention to him. Before I could really stop
to think about it or before he could stop me, I swung myself over the edge
of the panel and down into the hole.

"Mei!" I heard Tashi call my name, but I was too far engrossed in what I
was seeing to answer him. "Mei! Are you alright? Come out of there!"

I walked a little bit into the hole. It was so dark; I couldn't see a
thing. "Tashi?" I called.

"What?" came his tired voice.

"Can you pass me the light? I can't see anything in here."

Silence for a moment, then the light came swinging over the edge of the
panel. I caught it deftly, and pulled it down into my hand. I shone it
around the inside of the tunnel, taking paticular note of the smoothness of
the walls. Then, when I was about a third of the way down, I saw a big
yellow sign painted on the floor, surrounded by yellow stripes.

"Entry...Plug...Only," I read out loud as I swung the light from one side
to the other.

"Do...Not...Pass...This...Point. Hmm." Never one to listen to signs and
warnings, I kept going...and heard something go click.

I stopped dead. Inside, a red light started flashing.

"Mei!" Tashi was shouting. "Mei! Get out of there! MEI!"

That's when I realized that the panel was closing.



Chapter 3

Or rather, the panel was trying to close.

I turned around and saw that the panel was closing about halfway, stopping
then opening again. It tried to close, but it only repeated the same
process. Confused, I stepped back towards the entrance of the tunnel. The
red light stopped flashing, and the panel slid open again. I shone the
light around the tunnel walls, seeing for the first time the small square
on the floor, and I guessed I had stepped on it, making it sink and causing
some sort of reaction, but something was missing, so it stopped. "Huh," I
said to myself. Then I turned around and walked back out of the tunnel.

I handed the light back to Tashi and then swung myself back up onto the
panel with his help. When I was back up there, he surprised me by pulling
me into a rough hug.

"Don't ever do that again," he whispered in my ear. "You scared me half to
death."

"I'm fine," I assured him, more confused than ever. Tashi had stopped
hugging me three years ago...

He let me go a few moments later, pulling back to look at me with an
unreadable expression on his face. "Good," he said finally. "C'mon, let's
see if we can get this thing closed again." He turned and crawled from the
edge of the panel.

I followed, still wondering what had come over him.

We managed to get the panel closed by pressing the other button in the
smaller panel, but the cloth that had been covering the Unit was gone, so
we couldn't pull that over again. Tashi went up first, and then sent the
rope flying back down to me. I patted Unit-01 lovingly before catching hold
of the rope and Tashi lifted me up to the top of the shaft.

                                    ***

It was a couple months after I turned fourteen that we got Unit-01 working.

The leaders allowed us more freedom now. Tashi had appealed to them
quietly, saying that we couldn't possilbly couldn't find NERV HQ without
going off for a few days at a time. He also insisted that we couldn't
possibly take a radio with us; it would just attract any errant power down
here, and we could be electrocuted. He said it with just the right amount
of awe and fear in his voice and posture that they believed we would come
back, no matter what. Like we couldn't think for ourselves or escape or
make it on our own.

So we always went back to the Unit, just to see if we could make it work
again.

By then, we could jury rig anything that needed a power supply and was
electronical. Tashi found a generator which he got working again, and had
attached some cables to some lights we had found and hung around Unit-01.
Now we could see what we were doing.

We had poked around a bit more, finding what was left of what the door had
once said "Central Control."

Inside was various bits and pieces of what had been the ceiling lying all
over the place, and what looked like chairs were scattered across the
floor. Computer consoles were dark and some screens were broken. We tried
to get one working again, and it turned out that I had the best luck at
this.

I had next to no knowledge of electronics and the operating of computers,
yet it took me less than a month to get one of them working and accessing
files. That was how we learned about the EVA's.

There was more than just Unit-01, which had been our assumption until then.
There was Units-00 to 13. 00 to 04 needed pilots, thought sensors, entry
plugs and external power sources, but 05 through 13 were completely
independant. We learned what exactly the entry plugs were (they were long
cylinders which held the pilots and the vital portions that made the Unit
run) and what they did, plus the uses of the thought sensors, placed on the
head of the pilot. We also discovered that not all the Units had been
destroyed, but had been left in NERV HQ.

We searched for the other Units, but we didn't search very hard. We had
found Unit-01's entry plug and were primarily concerned with getting it
operational again.

Like everything else we had found, the entry plug needed cleaning, badly.
We had to take an entire week and a half just to get the door clear, and
another half a week to clean the manual door release out. Then we opened
the door and peered inside.

The air was stale of course, but we ignored it and waited until it had
cleared out. Then we could see the pilot's seat and hand controls...and a
suit and thought sensors lying on the seat. It was a major find.

I crawled into the plug, excited, and pulled the suit and sensors off the
seat. I backed out of the plug and handed the sensors to Tashi, holding up
the suit.

"Isn't this great?" I asked enthusiastically. "We found the essential parts
of the Unit!"

"Not really," Tashi said calmly, examining the sensors. "These are just
supposed to help. But that's not the point," he added. "We did make a major
find."

The day afterwards, we decided to try the plug out. Tashi went first,
placing the sensors on his head and climbimg inside. I shut the door behind
him, and waited quietly. He was inside a long time. Just when the silence
got unbearable and I was about to open the door, it swung open on its own
and Tashi stumbled out, coughing.

"It doesn't -- " He stopped to cough. "It has a personality," he continued
as I got in next to him and helped him out. "i don't know how, but it has a
distinct personality, and it doesn't like me." He looked up at me, his eyes
clouded slightly. Then he slowly reached up and pulled the sensors off of
his head. "Here, you try it. It might like you."

Startled, I took the sensors from him and affixed them to my head like I
had seen him do. Then I got up and climbed into the entry plug, closing the
door behind me. I faced the cramped inside and sat down in the pilot's
seat, placing my hands lightly on the controls.

It was a unique experience. I sat there for an indeterminate amount of
time, looking about me at the dark interior in awe. Then, when I let myself
relax and get used to the surroundings -- the smell and feel of the place
-- I felt what Tashi had: a distinct personality.

It wasn't the plug; I knew that without really realizing it. It was the
Unit itself, reaching out to the plug and into the sensors. I could feel it
lightly touching the edges of my mind, and that scared me. It seemed to
know that and pulled out. For the next few minutes, I could feel it's
conscience running over and through me, exploring whatever it was that made
me.

Then came the distinct and very clear thought: I like you.

It was shocking; it took me a moment to recover from that, and when I had,
I realized that the conscience was gone.

Stunned, I got out of the plug.

Tashi was waiting for me; he took hold of me as soon as I stepped out of
the plug. "How was it?" he asked tensely.

I couldn't reply for a moment. "It likes me," I said softly. "I don't know
how, or why, but it told me that it liked me."

Tashi seemed surprised for a moment. "Truly?' he asked.

I looked up at him, knowing that he could read what I was feeling in my
eyes. "Truly," I whispered, dropping my gaze.

He was silent a moment longer, and then he cheered loudly.

I stared up at him, surprised beyond belief.

"This is great!" he cried, lifting me up in the air and swinging me around.
He set me down and hugged me tightly. "We have a hope now," he whispered in
my ear. "We just might, beyond all expectations, actually make this work!"

I smiled, and rested my head against his shoulder. He continued to hold me
for some time, until he carefully and gently pushed me away, his hands
still resting on my shoulders.

"C'mon," he said warmly, smiling at me, "let's keep working."

                                    ***


Here it is for those who have been anxsiously waiting :P Enjoy!!

DISCLAIMER: Same as before, worship GAINAX, etc...

Neon Genesis Evangelion: At the End of the World

Chapter 4

   It was a month later that we really got Unit-01 working.
   I had been practicing getting into the entry plug and connecting
with the conscience in the Unit for the entire time. By now, I was an
absolute whiz at putting on the sensors and hopping in, to the point
where I was nearly positive that I could do it in my sleep and be
ready to go before I was even half-awake.
   Tashi had done all the tests on the plug while I was inside. He
showed me what he was doing -- using a the computer in Central
Control, he monitored what exactly was happening to me. He said
something about my synchronization rate going up by exponents (only a
couple, he said, but still...), but it all made very little sense to
me. All I really knew was that the Unit and I had an understanding
with each other...I would take care of it and it would take care of
me. Simple.
   The day of our big test came. We had set a date for when we would
attempt it, and for a lot of the time when I was working on the Unit
-- for whatever reason -- he had been trying to get the main power
generator up again. We had been able to charge the Unit's internal
power source for up to one minute, but it wasn't enough for the test
we had to run.
   We had to get Unit-01 clear of it's cage, out of the prison it had
known for the past gods knew how many years.
   The day started out great. Tashi and I took our time waking up,
slowly extracting ourselves from our "nest" of blanketing (it got
awfully cold down there, and we had been sharing a bed and blankets
since we had come here). Tashi made breakfast while I washed my hair
and body.
   I had never practiced in the pilot's suit. I just couldn't bing
myself to do it; I didn't want to get into the lovely thing when I was
as dirty as I was. There was never really any opportunity for baths
down here. I was lucky this time; Tashi had made sure there was enough
water for me to have a bath.
   I ate breakfast slowly, waiting for my hair to dry. Tashi was
conversational, asking me mundane questions that had nothing to do
with what we were attempting today. It was one of the best
conversations I'd ever had.
   He left after a time, saying that he had to make sure the power
connections were working right. I knew that that was a cover -- he
wanted to give me a little time to prepare myself.
   I was grateful for it. I sat there a bit longer, thinking quietly
to myself. I wasn't really scared of what I had to do, but I did need
to think a bit. When I was done, I stood up and went behind the
curtain we had hung to seperate our sleeping space from the rest of
the place to change into the suit.
   I had tried it on once, to see how it worked. I was glad to
discover in the computer's files how it operated. It was designed to
be worn over nude skin, and it went on loosely. There was a button on
the left wrist that, when pressed, sucked all the excess air out of
the suit and left it very form-fitting. This was good;  I didn't have
to worry about taking anything but my shirt and pants off, or about
getting it to fit right without having to sew it up again.
   I slipped into it now easily, closing it over my body and pausing
for just a second before pressing the button on the wrist. With a
hiss, the material suctioned itself to my body, giving me a feeling of
properness, for it hadn't felt right, sagging here and there in
uncomfortable places before.
   I looked down at myself as I attached the sensors to my head,
pinning my now-dry hair back with them. The suit had been designed for
a boy; that was obvious. I didn't have much in the way of a woman's
body though, so I didn't really distort the lines of the suit. It did
cleave nicely to the bits I did have, softening and accenting them
subtlely. I smiled to myself. It really felt good to be in this
suit...almost as if I was born to wear it.
   I stepped out from behind the curtain, and had the pleasure of
seeing Tashi's face go stunned. He had made it back early from the
power generators, I guessed in time to see me into the plug safely.
When I stepped out, he absolutely froze, a look of awe coming over his
face. His eyes ran up and down my body, and for the first time in my
life, I felt self-concious. I placed my hands behind my back, bowed my
head a little and cocked one leg. "Does it look okay?" I asked. "I
look silly, don't I?"
   "No," he assured me quickly. "No, it looks...well, great." A smile
crept over his features as his eyes met mine. I flushed at the lookof
approval in them. "You ready?" he continued.
   "As ready as I'll ever be," I replied, taking a step towards the
passage we used to get to the EVA.
   He stepped up beside me and offered me his arm. Confused and more
than a little pleased, I took it, my gloved hand resting lightly on
his forearm.
   At the entry plug, he opened the door for me and as I stepped
inside, he stopped me with a hand on my shoulder. "Good luck," he said
softly, a strange look on his face.
   I regarded him for a moment. "Thanks," I said, and climbed into the
plug. Tashi shut the door behind me.
   I was calm almost immeadiately, although a part of me was very
geared up and excited. I felt the Unit's conscience link softly to
mine, assuring me that everything was going to be okay. I smiled at
it, knowing it would feel the gesture more than see it.
   I was aware of the plug being lifted into the air. We had managed
to get it almost level with the entrance for it on the Unit, but it
still had to be lifted a bit to get it in. Tashi had been practicing
that as well, and he was really good at lining it up and getting it
in.
   The next thing I was aware of was the plug somewhere below my feet
being pushed slightly into the tunnel beneath the panel. That was all
it needed. The Unit took over, twisting the plug around until it was
securely into place, the panel closing protectively over it.
   A light came on inside the plug, a red light that was fairly dim,
but bright enough to see by. I closed my eyes, calming myself and
mentally running through all the preperations the Unit needed to be
ready to take off. I could feel the Unit responding to the silent
commands.
   A new voice cut into the silence of the pod. "Mei?" It was Tashi;
who else would it have been, down here on our own?
   "Yes?" I asked softly, still not opening my eyes.
   "I have to fill the plug with LCL. It's a chemical that will help
you breath in there."
   "All right," I replied. I felt so calm...
   I barely noticed the liquid rising up around my feet and over my
legs. When it rose up to where I could feel it on my bare skin, it was
too late and I had inhaled it. I choked at first, my eyes flying open,
but eventually I realized that it wasn't killing me, and that I was
actually breathing marginally better.
   "Can you still reply?" Tashi asked, sounding anxious.
   "Of course," I said, not even noticing the bubbles that rose out of
my mouth.
   "Oh, thank goodness...Okay, Mei," he continued, all business now,
"I have the generators rigged and ready. They're all powered up and
waiting."
   "Roger." I moved one control a little to the left and another
closer towards me. A display showed that power systems were online,
charged and ready to go.
   "I'm now checking the clearest route to the surface....done.
Transferring data now."
   Another disply showed a series of tunnels, all with green lights,
going up to the surface. "Roger," I said. "Systems show that the route
is clear."
   "Prepare for take off."
   I braced myself. The Unit assured me that everything would be fine.
   "NOW!"
   The Unit lurched and I had the impression of being shot up against
gravity at incredible speeds. It seemed to go on forever, until I
thought that my brain would join my feet at the bottom of the plug.
And then suddenly, it stopped. My stomach leaped into my throat.
   "Visuals!" I said aloud as well as thought. A screen in front of me
displayed what was on the outside.
   At first, I thought the visuals were busted, the screen was
completely black. Then, almost right overhead, lightning flashed
brightly. I realized that the the head was tilted up. With a great
effort, I managed to get the Unit to lower it's head.
   It's much harder in here, actually piloting it, rather than just
sitting in the plug, I thought.
   It' easy, came the thought from the Unit. Just relax.
   I was starled; I always was when it spoke to me like that, which
wasn't often. But I tried to do as it asked and sat back in my seat,
closing my eyes and forcing myself to relax. When I felt calm enough,
I pictured the Unit taking a step forward and felt it lurch. My eyes
flew open. I was still calm enough to move the head around, barely
noticing that it was much easier now, and Ilooked down. There, visible
in a flash of lightning, was one of the Unit's feet, placed in front
of the other as though it had paused in mid-stride.
   "Whoa," I said.
   The internal speakers crackled. "--ei?" came Tashi's voice. "Mei,
can you hear me?"
   I flipped a sitch. "I can hear you," I replied. "Can you hear me?"
   "It's a little broken up," he said, the speakers cutting out as
lightning flashed. " -- problems."
   "What? We have a problems?" I paused as lightning flashed again,
hitting the ground a few hundred feet off to the left. "What kind of
problems?" I continued once the speakers cleared.
   "We're generating loys of power, and I think it's enough for the
leaders to register it on their sensors back at their HQ. I'm also
registering movement about an hour from where we found Unit-01, but
they could be a lot closer or farther because there's so much
interference from the generators."
   "Drat," I said, thinking hard. "How long do we have before they get
suspicious?"
   "Maybe...5, 10 minutes. Twenty at the absolute most. We really
can't let them find out about this yet."
   "Roger that," I said, and turned the speakers down. "All right
then, Unit-01, let's see what you can do." I relaxed myself again and
pictured the Unit walking forward. It responded beautifully, walking
down the street and over rubble easily. I picked up the pace until we
were running and then turned a corner. Thrilled by how well the Unit
was doing, I turned it into a cartwheel. "Yahoo!" I yelled.
   "Mei!" Tashi's frantic voice cut in on my excitement. "Abort the
test! "Repeat, abort the test!"
   The Unit faltered on the last of the cartwheel as I lost
concentration and we crashed to the ground, sliding several hundred
feet from the momentum and stopping only when we plowed into a fallen
building.
   "What?' I demanded. "Tashi, what's going on?"
   "Those teams are in the farthest shaft of HQ here! I see them on
various levels, so there must be another Unit there! We can't let them
have it! I need you here to stop them!"
   "On my way!" I got EVA-01 extracted from the wreck of the building
and ran back the way I had come. When I got to the corner, I slid into
the intersection, purposely crashing into another building and using
it as a springboard to run back down the first street, barely noticing
the building crashing to the ground.
   I didn't know I had been shot to street level in an open
elevator-like thing, but I didn't stop to wonder about it as I ran up
and turned at the last moment so that my momentum carried me right
into it, facing the way I came. "Clear!" I shouted. The elevator shot
downwards immeadiately, and about a minute later, I was back
underground in NERV HQ.
   "Where to?" I asked Tashi.
   "To your left. Be careful, though. There might be other Units."
   "I will," I whispered and spun around in the tiny cage. My own
sensors were starting to display movement to my left, and it also
showed what was in between me and them. It registered seven other
presences, barely visible on the heat sensors; I didn't have or take
the time to let Tashi know or wonder about it. But now I did know they
were there, and spared them from the damage I could have casued.
   I crashed throught the last wall and skidded to a stop before
hitting the opposite wall. I froze, waiting for them to register my
presence while I already knew about theirs. I was amazed at the amount
of people; seven or eight entire divisions -- twenty pairs each -- and
most of the people higher up who kept them in line. They had high
powered lights which the turned on my about four seconds after I
stopped. I whipped my head around to face them, glaring at them
through their lights.
   Through the external sound recievers, I heard every last one of
them gasp. Several pairs screamed and a couple even turned tail and
ran.
   I knew I made an impressive sight. Sure, I was dusty from crashing
into two buildings topside and ten walls or so down here, but I was
still much, much bigger than them and I moved, unlike the still Unit
underneath it's protective sheet on the left. Slowly, I came out of
the posture I had held -- one foot in front of the other, arms held
out and bent at the elbows, body bent over slightly as though I was a
still frame in time and was about to go running through the other
wall, my face glaring balefully at them and my jaw, full of lots of
sharp teeth as big as a man, partly opened -- and turned to them,
taking one slow step towards them. Several more pairs screamed and
ran; a couple more fainted dead away. Even one of the higher-ups
fainted.
   I flipped the external speakers. "Leave," I said coldly. "You have
no business here."
   One of the leaders stepped forward. I recognized him as the head of
the project, though I knew that even he was just a pawn in a much
bigger game. I had always been afraid of him, but now he was the one
who looked afraid. His face was absolutely pale and his body
temperature was way up. He cleared his throat.
   "Um, we come in peace," he started, but stopped when I stepped
towards him and reached out a hand to take him in it. He nearly
fainted when I took hold of him carefully and brought him to eye
level. "No you don't," I said. He fainted.
   I turned to the rest of the people. "Anyone else want to tell me
lies?" I set him down again.
   No one moved.
   "Good. Now why are you here?"
   No one answered for a moment. Then one of the higher-ups cleared
his throat and timidly said, "We're supposed to find the lost
Evangelion Units of NERV."
   "You're too late. Obviously, I am found."
   "There must be more, like this one here -- "
   "There are no more!" I cut in. "This one is the last, but it is
dead. No one can resurrect it. Now I suggest that you all leave."
   There was a long pause. I noticed an almost imperceptible movement
out of the corner of my eye and turned towards it almost too late.
Someone was setting up a gun -- a big gun.
   And pulled the trigger. The barrel was aimed straight at my head.



Chapter 5

   Before I fully knew what was going on, I dropped into a crouch, the
missle going right past me and barrelling through the wall. Snarling
with anger, I jumped up and knocked them down, not caring at that
moment if they died or not. When I turned to face the group again, the
higher ups all had handguns trained on me.
   "Freeze!" the first one said, having recovered from his faint.
"Now, you're going to give us some answers."
   "The hell I am!" I took a step towards them, but stopped when they
opened fire. I raised both arms in front of my face, protecting it
with my forearms. But I kept walking towards them, and when they
paused to reload, I brought one arm and slammed it down in front of
them, effectively blocking their aim.
   "You are going to give me some answers," I snarled. "Why do you
want the EVA Units?"
   "We're working for Adam Carson," the first man said, somewhat
disgustedly. "He wants the Units so he can get the UN to agree to his
demands. I swear, that's all I know." He looked up, trying to see
around my arm.
   I didn't move for a long moment. Then I slowly lowered my arm.
"Leave, " I said again. "You won't find what you're looking for here."
   I watched impassively as the entire team filed out through a hole
in the wall. The higher ups all took the time to glare at me one last
time before going.
   When they were gone, I flipped the external speakers off and
sighed, sitting back in my seat, not realizing how tense I had been.
The Unit relaxed as well, throwing one arm against the wall and
resting my head against it.
   "How did it go?" Tashi's voice cut into the silence.
   "They'll be back," I replied. "They weren't too impressed when I
squashed their heavy-duty gun and the gunner, and they were even less
impressed when their handguns couldn't affect me and I made them
leave. They'll be back."
   I heard him sigh, relieved. "Thank goodness," he murmured. "So, is
there a Unit there?"
   I straightened up and took a step towards the covered Unit. "Yes.
I'm just checking now to see which one."
I reached out a hand, saw it in my viewscreen and froze, my mind
reeling.
   "Whoa," I whispered, my eyes widening.
   "What?"
   "I just realized...."
   "Realized what?"
   "I keep thinking of the Unit as myself...like it really was me.'
   But I am. I am a part of you, and you are a part of me.
   I took my hand off the controls and sat back in my seat, turning
the internal speakers off and closing my eyes. I sat there for several
moments, my mind utterly blank.
   You can't keep me out. We are a part of each other. There is
nothing to worry about.
   "There is plenty to worry about!" I cried. "I didn't want to kill
anybody! I didn't really want this -- "
   Yes, you did. You've always wanted freedom from them. I could tell
that right from the start.
   "How?"
   When you first stepped into me, without the entry plug. I wanted to
close up around you, but I need the plug. You are so close to my first
pilot...
   I wanted to cry. I buried my face in my hands, willing myself not
to talk to it anymore. I couldn't resist, though.
   "Who was your first pilot?"
   The thought softened. My son, Shinji.
   I thought that over for a bit. "How can a machine have children,
much less human children?" My internal speaker light was flashing
urgently. I ignored it.
   I wasn't always in this body. I was human once. And even this body
isn't completely mechanical. This is just a protective armor of sorts.
Part of me is organic.
   "Then how did you survive this long?"
   I had the distinct impression that the Unit was laughing. I'm not
too sure myself. It must have something to do with how I was created.
I was never told the details. And now, young one, you must uncover
that Unit. The presence slowly extracted itself from me, staying in
the back of my mind.
   Recovering my senses, I put my hands on the controls. "Alright,
let's do it," I said quietly. I pictured the Unit taking hold of the
sheet and pulling it off, which it did. It was easy to fall back into
the thought pattern that I was actually the Unit and not just plain
old Mei. The cloth fell away, and my sensors read what I couldn't see
in the dark.
   I flipped on the internal speakers again. Tashi was in the middle
of a tirade. "-alright? Mei, please, speak to me!"
   "I'm here," I replied softly. "And I found another Unit."
   "Oh thank heavens. Why did you turn off your speakers?"
   "I needed to think a bit."
   "Another Unit? Which one?"
   I paused for a moment, my eyes glued to the viewscreen. "Unit-00."
   There was a longer pause on his end. "What?"
   "Unit-00, Tashi. They almost had hold of Unit-00."

   ***

   It was quite awhile before Unit-00 was even remotely operational.
   It was in far worse shape than Unit-01 had been. I found it
kneeling, and I remember thinking somewhere in the back of my mind
that it was awfully short for a Unit, seeing as the computer had said
they were all around the same size. The reason why was obvious -- part
of the leg was missing. It looked as though a lot of the structural
support was missing. One arm was completely off, torn halfway up the
upper arm. The rest was lying beside it, and it looked as though
someone had started repairs to get it reattached. And it was just as
dusty as Unit-01 had been, if not more. I think the fact that an air
shaft was some hundred feet above it had a lot to do with that fact.
   The entry plug was lying half-buried under some rubble that was
probably created by the hole that the work force had blasted into the
shaft. I cleared it off and lifted it out easily in Unit-01, though I
felt like I was commiting sacrelige...the EVA's had been designed as
Earth's last defense against the Angels, not as a hard labor force.
The Unit assured me it didn't mind, but I still felt odd about it...
   The entry plug was a bit battered up. The front end was definitely
going to need some repairs before it could be used. That took both me
and Tashi -- me out of the Unit -- an entire week to get it any where
near usable. Then it took a few more days to get the manual door
release working.
   Inside, it was exactly the same as Unit-01's was. It even had the
thought sensors and pilot suit in the seat. The suit was very
obviously female, but by then, I had grown very attached to the one I
was wearing and I even considered it mine. We were lucky to search the
other shafts, finding a cage empty of a Unit but having an entry plug.
The plug said Unit-03, but the Unit was listed in the computer as
'lost'. The plug had a suit and thought sensors in it, but we left the
sensors there. The suit was far more to Tashi's liking; it fit him
like mine fit me -- tight without being uncomfortable, and made him
look fantastic.
   I had seen pictures of the original pilots, but only as their
security shots had depicted them -- sullen children who never seemed
to smile. The files had contained a head shot and one full body, two
of each if you counted the same sideways shot as a different picture.
The original pilot of EVA-00 was a sad looking girl with blue or
purple hair (it seemed to change between the two shots), red eyes and
dressed in a pretty blue dress with a white blouse. The file displayed
her name as Rei Ayanami. The original pilot of EVA-01 was Shinji
Ikari, and I could see why the Unit was proud of him, though it never
came out and said that. He had a quiet determination and courage about
his face which was reflected in his dark eyes. He was dressed in dark
pants and a dark shirt with a white one over top. The pilot of EVA-03
was another boy, taller than Shinji, and labelled as Touji. He had
dark hair and eyes as well, dressed in a black running suit. He had a
kind of arrogance in his picture, but even I could tell that he was
sad about something. I later found out that he had no parents and his
sister had died in the Angel attack on Tokyo-3 in which Shinji had
first piloted EVA-01. I also found info on the other two human pilots,
Asuka for EVA-02 and Kaworu for EVA-04, but their pictures were lost
or corrupted and were unreadable.    A few days after I had found
those, I managed to hack into the classified files of NERV, where
pictures of the pilots in their suits were found. Rei had gained an
air of competence and determination, Shinji looked damned near
impossible to stop, Touji had the look of one you didn't want to cross
swords with (I don't remember where I heard that line...it must have
been something Tashi said once) and I saw pictures of Asuka and Kaworu
for the first time. Asuka was wearing a crimson pilot suit, her brown
hair pinned back by matching thought sensors on her head. She had a
look of foolish confidence on her face. Kaworu was very serious,
though he had a dashing smile on his face. His eyes were the same
colour as Rei's, though his hair was grey. I thought that was odd for
a fourteen-year-old...
   Tashi joined me at that point, placing a hand on my shoulder and
leaning forward slightly. "Who's that?" he asked, tapping the screen
with a gloved hand. We had both taken to wearing the pilot suits
nearly constantly; they were very comfortable and our own clothes were
wearing out. We had no idea where we could get more.
   "Kaworu," I replied absently. "The original pilot of EVA-04."
   "I wonder if that one is still here," he mused quietly. "Is there
pictures of the pilots of 00 and 01?
   "Of course," I murmured and brought the pictures up without looking
at the keyboard. First 01, then 00. Tashi drew in his breath sharply
when Rei's picture flashed onto the screen.
   "What is it?" I asked, feeling him tense up.
   "I've seen her before," he replied. "In my dreams."
   I frowned a bit. "You've seen her in your dreams?"
   He nodded. "She never says anything, but she is always trying to
show me something. I can never see it, and just when I think I can, I
wake up."
   I pondered that. "Well," I said briskly. closing the files and
shutting the computer off. "Are you ready to try it out?" I stood up
and turned to him. He searched my face for a moment and then smiled.
   "You betcha."
   I smiled back and then led him from the room. It was a bit of a
walk to the shaft that held Unit-00, but I had planned for that and
had left Unit-01 waiting as transportation. I climbed into the plug,
closed the door and sat down just before it twisted itself down into
the tunnel behind the panel. Then I connected with the Unit and
offered the huge hand to Tashi. He climbed into the palm, and I curled
the fingers in protectively before taking off towards the far shaft.
   It wasn't far by EVA, but it would have taken a human on foot --
especially with all the rubble that was still lying around -- at least
a couple of hours.
   Unit-00 had taken so many more repairs. When we had reattached the
arm, I held it up in one hand, in line with the part that was still
attached to the body, while holding Tashi in the other as he welded a
lot of the connections back together. The leg repairs had gone much
the same way.
   Today would be the first time Tashi had attempted contact with
Unit-00. The files all said that it was volatile and even tried to
kill the pilot a couple of times. That told me that it had a
personality as strong as Unit-01's and I was a little reluctant to let
Tashi try and pilot it. I didn't know what I would do if it decided to
kill him...
   He got into the entry plug as soon as I set him down. Once the door
was closed, I picked up the plug as levelly as I could and got it
lined up for insertion into the Unit. "Here we go," I whispered to
myself, and placed it inside the little bit it needed.
   Nothing happened.
   I frowned, and shoved a little on the back end. It slid in then,
twisting around, although it did go grudgingly. Once it was fully in,
the back panel slid closed over it.
   I waited a few tense moments. Then the left arm twitched once,
twice, a third time. The Unit lurched to its feet. I jumped to mine
easily, backing up two steps and dropping my arms loosely to my sides.
Unit-00 turned jerkily to face me, looking at me unblinkingly with
it's one eye. I turned my internal speakers on. "How is it?" I asked.
   Tashi took a long moment to reply. "Wierd," he said finally. "I can
sense it in here, but it refuses to fully join with me. I think -- "
The speakers suddenly cut out.
   "Tashi?" I said, worried. "Tashi, what's going on? Why aren't you
on?"
   I was surprised out of my skin then as Unit-00 leaped forward with
sudden agility and attacked me.

                               ***


This started out as an HTML project, so if there;s still HTML tags in
it, I apologize *bow*

Once again, this story works on a different timeline than the one
depicted in the series, and NGE and the EVA's and all realted topics
are property of GAINAX.

*****************

Neon Gensis Evangelion: At the End of the World

Chapter 6

   It knocked me over at first -- not very far, of course, but it did
place it's hands on my shoulders and shifted it's weight to
overbalance me. I started to go down, but I had been in hand-to-hand
fights for years, and my instincts kicked in.
   I grabbed the other Unit by it's forearms, near the elbows, and as
I went down, I shifted my own weight further into my legs. I twisted,
folding one leg up beneath me and landing on my hip, Using the other
leg as a kind of lever, I jammed it up against the Unit-00's body and
threw it over my head. Neither of us had let go of the otherm and I
pushed myself up and over in a gravity-defying movem landing squarely
on Unit-00 beneath me.
   The other Unit was still for a moment, then it tried to throw me
off. I had expected that and prepared for it, so it didn't have a
chance. I held it down until it finally stopped trying to fight me.
   Tashi's speakers came back on. "It's over," he said wearily.
   "What the hell hapened?" I asked flatly.
   "It's volatile. The personality is very strong, and I get the
feeling that it doesn't really like anyone." There was a pause, and
then he sighed. "You said this was easy," he said, making it not quite
an accusation.
   "It was. For me," I said. "I never once said it would be the same
for you, if the Unit would even accept you. Are you up to trying
again?"
   Another pause, then he sighed. "Alright," he said resignedly. "If
you would kindly get off of me?"
   I got up, bending over to haul Unit-00 to it's feet. When it was
upright, I got around in behind it to hold it there. "You have to
relax, open yourself up to the Unit," I instructed softly. "That's all
that should be the same. Now turn off your speakers and try again."
There was a click as he did so.
   I sighed and waited, holding Unit-00 upright with both arms. I
wondered if it would work...
   It didn't. Unit-00 went beserk again.
   It didn't try to attack me again, which was a relief. It did try to
break free of the grip I held on it, which I refused to loose. It took
a shorter time to stop, but it also came more suddenly. I nearly fell
under the dead weight of the Unit, managing to stop our fall only by
kneeling awfully fast, leaving a nice big divot in the cage floor.
Even then, Unit-00's cracked agianst the ground.
   "Mei?" Tashi asked softly. He sounded tired or scared; I wasn't
sure which.
   "Yes?"
   "I want out. I don't like this.'
   "Does your entry plug release work?"
   Silence in which I could hear him hitting buttons in the
background. "Nope. It's dead."
   That was the moment Unit-00 came to life again. I was really
off-guard this time, though in hindsight I really shouldn't have been.
Because I was surprised, it managed to throw me off and ran to the far
corner, clawing at the walls, leaving gouges deeply into the cement as
though it was trying to climb out...but it was completely ignoring the
half-repaired hole in the outside wall and the EVA-sized hole leading
back to the rest of NERV.
   I sat back and watched it, wondering what kind of personality would
make anything reak out like that.
   I knew them, Unit-01 cut into my thoughts. It's voice sounded very
sad. They weren't very stable.  The voice faded away.
   "I can tell," I said, my eyes glued to the viewscreen. "Wait a
minute! What do you mean, 'they'?"
   On the screen, Unit-00 started punching the wall. I decided that it
had run amok long enough, and I got up to stop it.
   Not that it was doing itself much damage. Huge chunks of the wall
were coming off, but I knew that the wall was several meters thick
before reaching any other open space. Maybe the hands and fingers
would be scratched up bad and need some repairs, but nothing hugely
serious.
   It took quite a bit muscle to get Unit-00 pinned again. I managed
to get it faced down and forced open the entry plug access, pulling
the plug out. The Unit went still with the plug removed, so I got off
of it and set the plug down, upright. Then I waited tensely, heaving a
sigh of relief when the door popped open and Tashi half-stumbled,
half-fell out of the plug. i put my hand down for him, which he
climbed up into, and I raised it until it was behind my head. Then I
released my own entry plug.
   The plug twisted out until it was mostly out of the hole for it,
but not enough that it would fall over or out, or slip back in, yet I
could get in and out of the plug as I pleased.
   I waited for the LCL to drain before opening the door and crawling
over the back of Unit-01's neck until I could join Tashi in the palm
of the huge hand.
   He was laying down, curled up tightly on his side with his back to
me, and he was shuddering. I approached him as carefully and quietly
as I could, kneeling next to him and placing a hand on his shoulder.
The muscle beneath my hand twitched -- the only indication that he had
felt it.
   "Tashi?" I asked softly. "Are you alright?"
   He made a sound like a whimper.
   "I guess not. Okay, that's enough for today. I'm going to put you
in the plug with me, then I'm going to straighten this up, and then
we're going back. Sounds good? I thought so." I didn't wait for him to
reply before bending down to pick him up. I managed to pry one of his
arms out from around his legs and hooked it over my shoulders, hauling
him to his feet.
   By no small feat, I managed to get him over the back of the Unit's
neck and into the entry plug, behind my seat. Then I reactivated the
controls, and the plug twisted back down inside.
   I could sense that the Unit didn't like having Tashi inside with
me, but it didn't say anything. As an afterthought, I climbed up into
my chair, leaned around it and plucked the thought sensors off of
Tashi's head. I turned back around and dropped them in my lap as I
settled into my seat. Then I got to work.
   Unit-01 didn't function as well with Tashi in the plug, I
discovered. I figured that the thoughts running through his head at
the moment were so "loud" that the Unit could pick them up without the
help from the sensors, and they were disrupting the workings of the
Unit.
   I stood up and promptly fell over, because of the thought
disruption from Tashi. I had to readjust my own thoughts and got up
again, this time only overbalancing myself, and nearly falling over. I
wasn't sure if I should attempt to pick Unit-00 up and "put it away,"
as it were, when I could hardly stand up straight. But the other Unit
was far too important to just leave lying there, like it had drowned
or something....
   It was another great feat to get Unit-00 upright and back into it's
"holder." Then I picked up Unit-00's entry plug and stumbled my way
back to Central Control.
   Once there, I set the plug down as close to CC as I could get,
locked Unit-01 back into it's own "holder" and ejected the entry plug.
Then I got me and Tashi out, still having to all but carry him back to
our living space.
   I set him down in the sleeping area, laying him down carefully on
our blankets. He stared up at the high ceiling blankly, his breath
coming a little faster than it normally did. I wasn't a medic, but it
worried me, I waved my hand in front of his face; he didn't even
blink. I frowned, got up and went to get a cup of water from our
supply. When I came back, I dribbled a bit on his face; he still
didn't react. I got him into a sitting position and made him drink the
water, which he did, but I could tell it was an automatic reaction. I
sighed and laid him back down, hitting the button on his cuff to
release his suit from his body. He sighed a little and closed his
eyes. His breathing evened out a bit, and I relaxed. Even so, I pulled
the closing of his suit apart and started to get it off of him. He was
difficult to undress when he was unconscious; his limbs moved like
they were made of rubber, but he was heavy.
   I was glad I decided to take his suit off for him when I pulled one
of his arms out of its sleeve and my hand brushed his. It was
freezing. That worried me too. I got the rest of his suit off and
pulled the blankets up over his chilled body. Then I brushed his hair
back from his forehead before going back to CC.
   It felt wierd, doing something in CC without having Tashi nearby
doing something else. Yet I turned the computer on and sat down, my
eyes locked to the screen...
   I pulled up all the information I could find on Unit-00 and it's
original pilot, Rei Ayanami, complete with pictures, graphs, charts
and any number of things that made little or no sense.
   I must have spent at least three hours there, there was so much
information. Tashi and Rei were very much alike, whch came as a bit of
a surprise, though I suppose it shouldn't have. They were both quiet,
introspective and highly independant individuals. Maybe that was why
Unit-00 reacted to him that way...I sat back in my chair when I
finished, a chart of Rei's synchronization rates with Unit-00 on the
screen. I stared at it without seeing it. It was a few moments before
I sat up again and pulled up all the info on Unit-01 and Shinji Ikari,
as well as the tiny bit Tashi had entred on me. Mostly, I wanted to
compare my synchronization chart with the original pilot's.
   It was amazing; the rates were very similar, though Shinji's chart
had much more informationon it that mine, for the simple reason that
he'd been in Unit-01 longer than I had so far. And I didn't have a
bunch of executives hanging over my shoulder making all sorts of notes
and doing all sorts of tests.
   I sat there looking at the two charts overlapping each other for a
long moment, and then I started to pull up all the information on how
the Units and their pilots had been tested.
   I was halfway into that, waiting for the system to finish opening a
paticularily large file when Tashi put in an appearnce. He came up
behind me, laying a hand on my shoulder before pullingup another
chair. I spun mine around to face him, worried a little by the faint
circles under his eyes, the clouded look of them and the vague
expression on his face. I noticed that he hadn't put his suit back on,
or even bothered to get dressed again, though he had wrapped a blanket
around his body tightly.
   "How do you feel?" I asked, leaning forward to lightly touch his
arm.
   He flinched. "I don't know," he replied, avoiding my eyes. He
sounded tired and confused. "That was...like nothing else. I'm not
sure I want to go through that again."
   "I'm sorry," I said. "I should have done all those tests that you
did on me when we found Unit-01's entry plug."
   He looked at me briefly. His eyes were tortured for a moment; then
they clouded over again and he looked away. "Just...let me recover a
bit first."
   I smiled. "Of course." I turned back to the computer just as it
finished pulling up the file I wanted.
   It was another hour before I was finished with the computer. By
that time, my eyes were hurting and my leg muscles had begun to cramp.
I sat way back in my chair, stretching my arms above my head and
stretching my legs out beneath the desk. Then I pushed the chair back
and stood up, stretching again. Tashi stood up as well, although more
slowly. He still had that haunted look, and he pulled the blanket a
little bit tighter around himself.
   I looked at him for a moment. Then I stepped towards him and pulled
him into a hug. His entire body stiffened like a board for a brief
moment, but then he relaxed and opened the blanket up, pulling me
inside of it as he returned the hug.
   I rested my head on his shoulder, knowing somehow that he needed
this at the moment. Afterwards, in a minute, or an hour, or maybe even
the next day, he'd be his usual, remote self.



Chapter 7

   Tashi was doing better. It had been a month or so since he had
first tried operating Unit-00. Since then, I had been doing all sorts
of tests with him, mostly by throwing him into the entry plug and
monitoring it on the computer. I had brought Unit-00 into the same
space as Unit-01, so the "connection" between him and the Unit was a
little more complete. And he was doing better.
   It was just too bad that Unit-00 was stolen.
   It happened the night before our "big test", where I would put
Tashi and the entry plug back inside Unit-00. I had moved both the
Unit and the plug back to it's original cage, though looking back on
it, I can't see why I did that. So the next day, when we went to the
cage to do the test, the Unit-00 was gone.
   The thieves had left plenty of evidence as to where they had taken
it, and how they had managed to do so. There was big tire tracks, a
lot of rubble had been cleared away, and there were so many
footprints...I was rather put out to find that Unit-00 had been taken.
I had been all for going after them, but Tashi managed to convince me
that all in all, it wasn't really worth it. So I sulked about the loss
of Unit-00 for a few days, and then Tashi and I went about the rest of
NERV, trying to find anything else we could use.
   I had been all set to go searching through the other cages to find
a useable EVA. Tashi said that it wasn't really top priority, and then
he pointed out what else we could be doing. There was still the power
source we were using to be fixed and set up properly, the computers to
get running, not just my little terminal, an area where we could set
up a proper living space for ourselves, plus we had to make another
food run and get some more water. In light of all this, I had to
agree, however reluctantly.
   It was weeks before we could get back to the cages. Tashi and I
spent many, many sleepless nights getting the main power generator
back on its feet, as it were. It was disconnected for three days
straight as we rearranged the wiring properly. Then it was back up and
running smoothly. Tashi and I had cheered our success and then
promptly fallen over and started sleeping.
   Our next task was the computers, the main ones. One was already
running, but on minimal levels. That took a bit longer than the
generator, perhaps three times longer. Once the computers were back
up, I had to spend another day or two weeding out all the corrupted
files and fixing what I could. I just hoped that I didn't do worse
damage to them than had already been done...
   While I was working on the corrupted computer files, Tashi had gone
out exploring and found some rooms where we could live, close to
Central Control. There was a room with actual beds in it, though they
would need some serious cleaning. They were covered in dust and pieces
of the ceiling, and who knew what else. Another room was just outside
with some dusty and almost unrecognizable furniture. When we cleaned
it off, we found a table or two, a chair and a longer chair that Tashi
called a couch. Then we found a closet with blankets and pillows,
which was probably the biggest find of all, next to the Units. So for
the first time in close to ten years, I slept in actual bed with real
blankets and a real pillow, not some moth-eaten covering and a hard
lump of what used to be a pillow. The only problem was, I was so used
to sleeping next to Tashi that I found it hard to fall asleep without
him next to me.
   Our next mission was to find food, which I had to take Unit-01 to
the surface to find. It took the better part of a day, but I finally
found a dried goods warehouse, judging by the weathered and almost
unreadable lettering on the side of the building, which still had it's
walls intact. I got out of Unit-01 to gather what I could, because I
wanted to leave it intact. In the end, I had taken enough to last us a
few more months.
   While I had been gone, Tashi had gathered more water and stored it
in some wierd looking boxes. I didn't question it; water was a
necessity, and however we could get it, as long as it didn't run out
or spill, was a good thing.
   After that we had to spend another week or two fixing up our living
space. The ceilings were rather untrustworthy-looking and there was so
much dust and mess everywhere....
   Then, I could go back to the cages and search through them.
   It was a fascinating search. I'd had the opportunity to go through
them before, and I had found the other six EVA's that Unit-01
registered as there. I hadn't had time them, however, to check and see
which ones were which. Now I had that opportunity.
   But first, I had to clear away a lot of rubble.
   The EVA bay, where I stored Unit-01 most of the time, was just
covered in debris from the ceiling and the walls and from
who-knew-what-else. I used Unit-01 to clear away the big chunks of
rock and cement, and then I attempted to make doorways or at least
door frames out of the holes I had bashed into the walls and EVA cages
so long ago. Tashi had found some white powder that made up a wierd
and sloppy-looking paste when it was mixed with water. It was supposed
to make some sort of glue, I think...it didn't work very well, but at
least it held the smaller pieces of the walls in place when I thumped
around.
   Once those were stabilized, I went to the covered lumps that were
the other EVA Units and brought them out of their cages into the EVA
bay. I waited until they were all there before removing their covers,
even though it took two days and ate me from the inside out with
curiousity.
   And then, on the third day, Tashi and I wole up nice and early and
went to the EVA bay to uncover the seven mysterious EVA Units.

                               ***


HAHAHAAAA!!!! After many requests and scaling one huge wall of
writer's block, Part 4 is finally done!! Many thanks to those who have
emailed me with their comments, and many more thanks to those who have
waited so patiently for Part 4 to come out. Part 5 is in the works
right now. I apologize for any HTML tags still in the story; it was
orginaly written as an HTML file.

--Luna

Neon Genesis Evangelion is property of Gainax and AD Vision (did i get
that right?)

Neon Gensis Evangelion: At the End of the World

Chapter 8

   "So what do you think?" Tashi asked, staring up at the impossibly
huge, covered Units.
   "About what?" I replied, mimicking his pose.
   "How do we uncover them? I know you've been looking forward to this
for awhile, and I have to admit, it's been getting to me too." I
sensed his smile, rather than saw it. "How about we just run up and
pull covers off?" He turned to me, and when I looked at him, he was
grinning, an unrestrained glint of incredible amusement in his eyes.
   This was shocking to me. Tashi had always been quiet and
restrained, and he almost never laughed. But I returned the grin and
laughed. "Yeah!" I cried, jumping up into the air. Then I ran to the
nearest EVA, took hold of the cover and yanked.
   It slid off easily and covered me in a dusty heap, and it took me
twenty minutes at least to fight my way out from underneath it. When I
emerged, I was covered in dust and pieces of debris, and I was
coughing horriedly, trying to get some clean air into my lungs. By
that time, Tashi had already pulled off the other covers of the EVA's,
having had more sense not to get underneath the silly things.
   "Are you okay?" he asked, helping me to my feet as I coughed some
more.
   "Sure," I replied, smiling at him. "I like to get underneath huge
sheets of dusty cloth every now and then just to remind myself how
nice it is to breathe."
   He grinned again, brushing my hair back with one hand and pulling
me into a one-armed hug. I returned it as best as I could, coughing
one more time before looking up at the uncovered EVA's.
   They were an impressive sight. Unit-01 stood at the far end by
itself, as always. I wasn't sure if I'd ever let any other Unit get
that close to it, especially when I didn't know if the other Units
would react like Unit-00 did...
   In the middle was a red one, much like Unit-01. On either side of
it were three more Units, all the same. They were white. But other
than that, it was like trying to see a flag when you were at the base
of a cliff.
   "Can't tell much from here, huh?" I said, trying hard to forget
that Tashi hadn't let go of me yet.
   He shook his head slightly. "Nope," he agreed. "Why don't you get
in that Unit of yours and get a closer look.
   "Good idea," I said, slipping out from under his arm and running
across the bay to get to Unit-01.
   It was perhaps ten minutes and a very long stair climb later that I
was climbing into the entry plug of Unit-01. Less than a minute after
that, the plug was filled with LCL and my view of the outside was on,
only that much bigger due to the size of the EVA.
   I released the clamps that held it in and stepped out, shaking the
ground -- as usual. I just couldn't seem to step quietly whenever I
was in Unit-01... I walked across the bay in a half-dozen steps,
stopping next to Tashi and taking my first real look at the other
EVA's.
   The red one was the nicest-looking one of the whole lot. It had
four eyes, two mouths, though one looked like it had been broken,
shoulder blades like Unit-01's and no horn on the end of its nose.
That was a shame, really, but by this point I was predjudiced against
all the other Unit's having been with Unit-01 for nearly three months
now. Compared to the other Units, the red one was gorgeous. It needed
repairs of course -- they all did -- and it was the least damaged of
the seven.
   Now the other six...they all looked the same. They reminded me of
pictures Tashi had shown me from one of his storybooks when we were
children, pictures of things he said were demons. Their heads were
smooth -- relatively of course; one was missing the entire right side
and two more had the tops crushed in. The faces were absolutely
featureless except for a wide, grinning mouth, the outer edges painted
bright red, even after all this time. It looked as though they had
been eating something that had been alive...They were missing the
shoulder blades that characterized Unit-01 and the red one. Overall,
they were kind of scary...
   I flipped on the external speakers. "They'll need repairs of
course," I said and I could hear my voice echo through the bay. "But
you really have to see these..." I knelt and put my hand down for
Tashi. He climbed on and I lifted my hand, standing up as I did so,
until he was eye level with the other Units.
   I heard him gasp and I saw his body stiffen. "They're kinda of
ugly, aren't they?" he said after a moment, one hand pressed to the
collar of his pilot suit.
   I shrugged inside the EVA; the movement wasn't copied outside. "I
dunno. If you think about it, so's Unit-01."
   He looked up at Unit-01 and grinned. "Yeah, it is kind of ugly,
isn't it?"
   I raised the Unit's free hand and waggled a finger at him. "Be nice
now," I teased.
   He stuck his tongue out at me.
   I sighed, knowing it would be heard outside. "So what do we do
now?" I asked, dropping my hand back to my side.
   "We get started," he replied. "If you can set me down on the red
one, I'll see how much work needs to be done to that jaw while you go
fetch all the rest of the equipment."
   "Yes, sir!" I replied, stepping up to the red EVA and letting Tashi
off on the shoulder. Then I turned to the other end of the EVA bay and
went to fetch the huge mass of ropes and pulleys that we used to
clamber up and down the gigantic sides of the EVA Units.

   ***

   "Damnit," I swore as the Unit shut down for the fourth time.
   The plug went dark, and I sat back in my seat, sighing heavily. We
had been having power troubles all week, and we just couldn't figure
out what was wrong. All the contacts and power supplies had checked
out all right...
   The power came back on, and I quickly took advantage of it, taking
Unit-01 back to it's cage, locking it into place and ejecting the
plug. There was just no point to trying to keep up with it...
   Back at the command center, Tashi was staring at a printout of what
looked like a topographical map. I didn't know what he used for the
few printouts he made, and I didn't think that I really wanted to
know. He'd made a comment once about borrowing someone's supplies, and
I just decided to ignore it.
   "Look at this, Mei," he said as I closed the door, pulling the
thought sensors off my head. I crossed the room to where he sat,
combing my hair out with my fingers. Then I leaned over his shoulder,
my eyes running over the map.
   It was actually a very nice map. It was the colour of the printout
material -- a kind of yellowish -- covered in wiggly black lines.
There were small coloured dots with numbers and a "+" or a "-" next to
them, and I took those to read as heights of the landscape. Though
where the zero was for these markings, I hadn't the foggiest idea.
There were more coloured marks with Tashi's writing next to them.
   "What's this for?" I asked.
   "It's a topgraphical map of the surrounding area," he replied.
"See, here's the lake." He pointed at one spot on the map.
   I shook my head; all the squiggly lines and coloured markings
confused my eyes. "It makes no sense to me," I told him. "That's why
you sit up here with these things all day," I continued as he
half-turned to explain it to me, "and I sit in an entry plug all day.
You're the thinker; I'm the doer. Let's just leave it at that,
alright?"
   He shrugged and turned back to the map. "Okay, I think I know
what's been causing all these power fluctuations."
   "Oh really?" That perked my interest. It was hard to get anything
done when the power didnt work.
   "Yes really. Over here, by this mark here - " He pointed at a pale
blue "X" next to a yellow "-1450". "There's an old tower of some sort
there. I think it may have been hit in that last electrical storm, and
its been leaching power since then."
   I thought about it for a bit. "It makes sense," I said slowly. The
only knowledge I had of this sort of thing was what Tashi had told me;
and the reasons I had given him -- he was the thinker, not me. "What
do you want to do about it then?"
   "I want you to take Unit-01 and dismantle it, any way you can. The
easiest would probably be to just knock it over and then stomp on it
for a bit."
   "But how? I can't keep the Unit operational for more than ten
minutes with the fluctuations we've been having."
   "There is...one way," he said, cautiously. "I didn't mention it
before, because i would rather it be used only in emergencies..."
   I waited patiently; he would get to the point sometime today.
   "The Unit has a back-up power supply, enough for five minutes. You
release the umbilical cable; the back-up kicks in. But it's only for
five minutes. Then the Unit shuts right down." He leaned forward over
the map then, making a small mark with a pale pink pencil.
   "Where did you get those?" I asked absently. I straightened and
stretched tiredly.
   "Get what?" he replied, just as absently. "Oh, these pencils? I
found them in a storage room." He swiveled around in his chair. "You
look dead. You should go get some sleep."
   "I'm not tired," I lied, yawning.
   Tashi smiled and rose to his feet. "Sure you're not. Come on; I'll
help you into bed."
   "I can do it myself," I protested, though it lacked any sort of
conviction. I yawned again.
   "Mei," he said simply, catching my chin in his hand and tilting my
face up to his. "You work too hard. Go get some sleep."
   "Okay fine," I said, sounding a little grumpy to even my own ears.
Maybe it was time I had a bit more sleep than I had been getting...
   Without waiting any longer, I turned and left him alone to his maps
while I went to bed.



Chapter 9

   Unit-00 was returned to us that night.
   I was sleeping very soundly, and I was having troubled dreams that
eluded memory. There was a huge crash that showered parts of the
ceiling down on me; the noise and the crumbling of plaster and cement
and other choice pieces of the ceiling falling on me woke me up.
   I got out of bed hurriedly, taking time only to pull on my pilot
suit before dashing out of my room, still struggling to get the thing
closed. I ran all the way to CC, hitting the suction button on my left
wrist moments before bursting into the room.
   Tashi was brushing ceiling bits from himself and the map,
alternately. He looked pretty sour.
   "What's going on?" I asked.
   "I don't know," he said irritably. "Whatever it was, it was big,
and it made a mess on my map." He looked up as the room shuddered
again. "Damnit," he swore. "It's not natural, either, I'll bet. I'll
track it; you see if the Unit will respond. If you have to, blast the
umbilical cable away."
   "Got it," I replied, dashing from the room.
   It was somewhat easier to get in the EVA from CC, seeing as i had
to go down some stairs to get level with it. Not much later, the Unit
was active again.
   "It looks like it's coming from the northwest, Mei," Tashi said
once I turned on the radio to let him know that I was active. "In one
of the launching shafts." He sounded puzzled.
   "The launching shaft?" I repeated, also puzzled.
   "That's what the sensors say," he assured me.
   I shrugged. "Okay. I'll be back in a jiffy." With that, I
disengaged the safety locks and went to investigate.

   ***

   The power had went out yet again, and I was now operating on four
minutes of temporary power. The ceiling continued to crumble in bits
and pieces, and a part of my mind worried about the structure falling
in on us. Then another part told that part to shut up -- NERV had been
here for who-knew-how-long, so it wasn't likely to collapse anytime
soon. That didn't stop me from worrying about being crushed, or --
more so -- about Tashi being crushed.
   I couldn't let that kind of thinking bother me, because it was
starting to reflect in the Unit's performance, so I started singing --
horrendously off-key -- to myself. I didn't know what I was singing;
it was just a bunch of words to me.
   I reached the northwest launching shaft moments later, tracking the
disturbance by the amount of noise and destruction going on. Peering
up into the shaft, I could tell that the innermost doors were just
about ready to burst, so I stepped to one side of them and flattened
myself as best as I could against the wall.
   The doors burst downwards, landing on the floor with a great
clatter, and Unit-00 fell down after them.
   I was surprised. I suppose I shouldn't have been, looking back on
it, but I was. I didn't think Unit-00 would ever be returned to us.
Yet here it was, and somehow, I knew that it wasn't here with the
express purpose of rejoining me and Tashi.
   The Unit had fallen in a jumble of arms and legs, but it righted
itself quickly. I stayed absolutely still, hoping that it wouldn't
notice me. It didn't; it started to walk in Tashi's direction. I
followed behind, matching it's footsteps exactly. I was a little
concerned that I wouldn't have enough time; my counter read two
minutes left.
   Unit-00 paused at a intersection in the EVA-sized passageways; I
took the opportunity and jumped on it from behind, knocking it flat to
the ground. The pilot was surprised enough, I guess, to not fight
back. Whoever it was had only started to fight back when I pulled up
the back panel covering the entry plug and yanked it out. Unit-00
shuddered once and lay still. I grabbed the plug in my hand, got up
and ran back to CC as fast as I could, the counter now reading less
than a minute.
   I was lucky, I got back to CC and knelt, laying the plug down on
the floor and ejecting my own just as the counter ran out. Unit-01
froze in place, one hand still on the other entry plug.
   The power had come back on, it looked like; Tashi joined me on the
floor, carrying a large battery-powered lamp in case it went out
again. "Power cord first," he yelled up to me. Waving to show that I
had heard him, I jumped down to the floor, grabbed the power cable for
Unit-01 in both hands and started dragging it back. Luckily, it wasn't
far. Tashi helped me drag it back to the Unit, lift it up to the back
and guide it back into place. I got back into the EVA, let the other
plug go and cupped my hands around it and Tashi so that when he opened
it, whoever the pilot was wouldn't get away.
   I needn't have worried, it turned out. Tashi opened the plug, the
LCL pouring out around his legs, and crawled inside cautiously. He was
inside longer than seemed necessary and when he came out, he was
carrying a semi-concious girl, no older than me. I lifted my hands,
letting him take her away.
   I went and fetched Unit-00, setting it up in the cage next to mine.
Locking it in place, I put Unit-01 back into it's cage and went to
join Tashi.


Who is the mysterious pilot of Unit-00? Will we ever find out who she
is? Will Unit-00 work again? Tune in next time! Same EVA_time, same
EVA-channel!!



I know some of you have been anxiously awaiting part 5, and HERE IT
IS!!! Just finished it; you guys are the first people to see it.
(Well, at least it's finished form. Dont you feel special? ^_^) 

All the usual copyright notices apply.

Neon Gensis Evangelion: At the End of the World

Chapter 10

   "What did you think you were DOING???" Tashi yelled.
   I only stared at him, my eyes wide with shock. Tashi had never
yelled at me. He bent over the girl again, forcing open her eyelid and
peering into her eye.
   "Well?" he demanded, glancing back over his shoulder at me.
   "What I was supposed to do," I replied.
   "Oh," he said, sarcastically, "so what you're supposed to do is put
EVA pilots into states of shock, hmm?"
   I was quiet for a few moments. "I don't understand why you're
yelling at me," I whispered. 
   Tashi turned to me then. "Because you don't think, Mei. You never
think before doing anything. Didn't it even occur to you what may
happen when the pilot of a Unit is torn out of the EVA that way before
they have a chance to disengage properly? The psychological shock --
it could kill them!" He turned his back to me again, checking the
other pilot again. "Damnit," he swore, under his breath, though at
what I couldn't tell.
   "Mei -- " I heard him start.
   But I didn't respond. I had turned and walked out of the room. I
even started running down the hallway when he called after me.
Whatever he wanted me for, it could wait, I decided, ignoring the
tears that burned my eyes. The image I had built of Tashi in my mind
-- the kind, caring Tashi who was always there for me -- had been
shattered.
   *****
   I had sought refuge in Unit-01, sitting in the entry plug and
sliding into the Unit, but not activating it. I sat in the seat, the
crossbar pulled up across my lap, my arms drawn tightly across my
chest, my head bent. I wanted to cry, but I couldn't. I felt like I
was just an shell, wanting all these needs, and being unable to
express them. 
   What is bothering you? the Unit asked.
   I was used to the Unit's conciousness popping in and out at random
by now. "Tashi," I said shortly.
   Ah. I never liked him. His thought patterns are too organized.
Rei's were, but she put them out better.
   I ignored it.
   Why do you even put up with him? I could never understand that. I
don't know why you would even --
   "Would you shut up?!" I all but shouted. "If you must know," I
continued, quietly, "I stay with him because he is the only person who
ever cared enough about me to make sure that I never got hurt."
   Yet you hurt now.
   I was long in answering. "Yes," I said finally. "He... Why am I
explaining this to you?"
   Because you want to...and because you need to.
   *****
   It was sometime later that I was able to return into the main
complex of rooms we had cleared out. I had explained what was wrong to
the Unit, wondering the whole time about explaining anything to a
being I couldn't even be sure was real. But I felt better after
getting the story out of my system, and I sat there in the entry plug
for a while longer before feeling brave enough to dare Tashi's temper
again.
   My luck: he wasn't around, and I wasn't about to go look for him. I
just got myself something to eat for dinner, picked up a very worn
book that we had found sealed in a airtight box, so it wasn't in too
bad a shape, and still readable, and went to my room. I lay there on
my bed, reading (or trying to at least; I still couldn't read that
well) and just waiting to feel tired enough to attempt sleep. Only
once did I hear footsteps in the hallway outside. I stayed absolutely
still as the footsteps paused, and then they moved on. I let out a
sigh of relief. I could at least make it through this one night...
      *****   
The next day, Tashi burst into my room, demanding loudly that I get up
now, thank you very much, and that we had an emergency, so I'd better
get going and blahblahblah. I ignored him, or tried to, as I hadn't
slept very well or long, because sleep evaded me for some time and
then I was troubled by dreams.
   When he started to shake me, I just mumbled for him to leave me
alone, but then he grabbed my arm roughly and hauled me out of bed,
ignoring my state of undress.
   "MEI!!!!" he shouted in my ear. "GET UP!!!!!"
   Awake now, no small part of me indifferent to the freezing floor, I
stared up at him, wondering what I had done now to deserve such rough
treatment. Then I saw the look in his eyes.
   He was afraid. Very afraid. And I was scared and confused all in
one moment.
   "What's wrong?" I asked, trying to control my wavering voice and
being largely unsuccessful.
   "Everything," he moaned, waving his hands nervously, a gesture I
had never seen him use. "The entry plug for Unit-00 is badly damaged
-- " and here he glared at me briefly " -- but the pilot is the main
reason. She's in some kind of neural shock and I don't know what to
do!!"
   My Tashi didn't know what to do. This was a surprise in itself, but
I covered it well. Instead of staring at him, dumbstruck as I felt, I
got up from the floor and pulled my plug suit on, thinking brifely
that I desperately needed to take a bath. "Let me see her," I said
dispassionately. I couldn't say why I felt no emotion to this strange
girl.
   That quickly changed when I saw her. She had been stripped down
(which was to the better, as she hadn't been wearing the proper suit
anyway) and covered with a thin blanket. Her eyes stared blankly up at
the ceiling, her skin a pasty, unhealthy white. Her eyes were dark
green, I could see, and a very pretty shade, too. I knew my eyes were
blue -- we did have a single, tiny mirror -- and I thought absently
that mine were too dark to be pretty.
   I bent over her, holding my hair back with one hand, and pressed my
ear to her chest, listening to her heartbeat, which was wildly
erractic. I peered into her eyes, much as Tashi had done the day
before, and the pupils didn't do a thing when my head blocked the
light. Her hand felt cool to the touch, as did the rest of her skin.
   "What have you tried?" I asked Tashi.
   "Everything we have," he replied nervously. 
   I looked up at him sharply. "Everything?" I repeated, incredulous.
   "Yes, everything," he assured me, too worried to be annoyed with
me.
   I stared at the girl a moment or two longer. She was my age, maybe
a little older, but certainly no older than Tashi. And she was far
prettier than me. Her hair was a bright green, several shades lighter
than her eyes, and her skin would be pale, but healthily so,
especially living underground as we were. I don't know why I cared so
much about my appearance just then, with only the vaguest inkling that
it had something to do with Tashi.
   "What happened to her thought sensors?" I aske then. "She did have
some, ne?"
   "Of course," Tashi said, confusion written all over his face.
"They're right over here..." He moved to where they lay on a nearby
counter top, got them and brought them to me.
   I took them and mumbled a thanks, judging the best place to put
them on her head. I pushed her hair away from her face, attaching one
sensor and then the other in a fair approximation of where mine sat.
   For a moment, nothing happened. She continued to stare blankly at
the ceiling, looking nothing more like one of the corpses Tashi and I
had come across once before we rebelled, the only sign that she was
alive the spasmodic jerking of her chest as she breathed.
   Then, she came alive all at once. She started shrieking and
thrashing on her bed, to the point where both Tashi and I had to use
our entire bodies to hold her in place while she calmed down. Neither
of us had much body mass, so she almost fell off the bed twice before
we found the best way to pin her down.
   "Nice going," Tashi breathed heavily once she stopped moving.
   "It worked, didn't it?" I hissed at him.
   "Oh, Mama," the girl wailed then and started to cry like her heart
was breaking.
   *****
   Risa accepted the mug Tashi handed to her with a tiny, almost
imperceptible smile. She was now dressed as an EVA pilot should, in
the original suit we had found with the plug (I would have worn it,
but I didn't have the figure for it; she did), the thought sensors on
her head and her hair bound up in two identical buns on the top and on
either side of her head. Two faded ribbons hung down from the buns,
holding them in place.
   She had introduced herself as Risa once she had fully woken up from
the shock, a scant hour ago. She had explained to us -- briefly --
that her mother had been killed years ago and she had watched it
happen before several large men had carried her off in a white van and
brought her to work in the tunnels to find NERV.
   I was angry; more at the men who had done this than at her or
myself. I knew what it was like to be carried off to be put to hard
labour, but I had never had a mother, so I couldn't relate to that
part. Tashi's mother had never really liked me, and he had told me one
night that he felt no paticular loss at his leaving her. That had
enraged me too. At least you HAD a mother, I had thought darkly, as I
did now.
   I apologized -- again -- for the huge mistake I had made in tearing
her and the plug from the Unit.I felt terrible about it now, wishing I
could go back in time and correct that mistake, but Risa assured me
that she would be alright and that if I hadn't done it, she might have
done the same to me.
   She told us how she had lost all hope of ever being free from the
men who had held thousands of children for labour, until a man with
dark hair and a small beard has approached her and asked her if she
would be willing to help him out. It would mean getting out of the
dark and dangerous tunnels for her, and she was glad for the chance.
   "That was, oh, I don't know how long ago that was," she said
softly, staring down into her mug and it's contents. "Too long. It was
ages before I could sit in the plug -- is that what it's called? --
and not have to worry about being the victim of such internal
anguish..." Here she broke off, though I knew there was more to the
story.
   "And then," Risa continued briskly, "Adam -- he's the one who asked
me if I would volunteer -- approached me and told me of some renegades
he had lost several months back, and that if I felt up to it, I was to
track them down and bring them back, and report whatever it was they
held. That's you two, right?"
   I nodded solemnly, the gesture repeated by Tashi.
   Risa sighed heavily, leaning backwards and closing her eyes. "I
thought so," she whispered, more to herself than either of us. "Some
of the other kids talked about how two lucky kids found NERV and had
gotten away, and that Adam wouldn't dare touch them now. They wished
most heartily that they could get away too, but none of them had the
first inkling of where to go or how to find you. You are quite an
inspiration model to them, you know. They go through each day, hoping
to find where you'd gone through to NERV and join you here. And when
they don't have any luck, they hope to have more the next day." She
shrugged carefully. 
   Tashi and I exchanged glances. More was known about us than we had
first supposed. 
   "Risa," Tashi began gently, "you are more than welcome to stay with
us. Gladly, would we have your company."
   She looked up at him and smiled ever-so-charmingly. "Thank you,
Tashi," she said softly, with no hint of deception, only true
gratitude. "And you too, Mei," she added, flicking her glance in my
direction.
   I only nodded my head absently in response. "Tashi, how bad did you
say the entry plug was?" I asked, wanting to immerse myself in work.
   "Pretty bad," he replied, his manner curious about why I was
suddenly so interested in working on something so tedious.
   "I should go see to it then," I said, rising from my seat and
striding from the room.

Chapter 11

   Risa shared a room with me; made sense, Tashi had said. After all,
why clear out another room when there was plenty of room in mine?
   I didn't know how to react to this. I wasn't sure that I wanted
Risa in my room, for various reasons. The first of which was that I
had always had to share my sleeping space with something, and for the
past few months, this room had been mine and mine alone. The second
was that I still didn't know how I felt about Risa.
   She seemed nice enough, very quiet and not talking much, and when
she did say something, it was always worth listening to. Now that she
was walking around, she was a little bit taller than me, and I was
again struck with the slenderness of her body and figure. A small part
of my mind criticized me for being too short and nothing but skin and
bones.
   "So what do you do?" I asked, sitting rigidly on my bed, my knees
drawn up to my chest.
   Risa looked up at me, confused. "Hmm? Oh, nothing special. I just
did whatever they told me to do." She gave a little laugh, sounding
like the one bird I remembered from my childhood: happy and uncaring.
"My mama..." Here she paused, her face clouding over with grief. "My
mama was a doctor, and I wanted to be just like her."
   "Where did you live?" I asked, wondering briefly -- and too late --
if I was being rude.
   "In a city. South of here, I think." She smiled. "I was studying to
be a doctor. It was hard. All the spots in schools were given mostly
to boys. The odd girl who could make it in often dropped out because
of what they did." Her eyes flashed angrily. "I wouldn't let them get
to me -- "
   "How old are you?" I interupted.
   She stared at me for a moment. "Fourteen," she replied.
   "And you made it to school? Now aren't you lucky." I was being just
a touch sarcastic, but then I got up from the bed and left the room
without waiting for her to reply.
   *****
   That night, for the first time, I had The Dream.
   It was short, almost beyond recollection, but I remembered the
face. I woke up suddenly, sitting up straight in my bed with the
blankets clutched to my chest. My hair felt sticky with sweat, and a
drop of it ran down my cheek to land on my hand.
   I stared at it in the semi-darkness caused by the one emergency
light in the corner, weak as it was. That was when I remembered the
face. It was huge; a sickly-coloured pink, oddly shaped, with a
bulging eye socket. The socket bubbled in several different places and
then a green eye rolled out of the folds between the bubbles, the
triple-iris swinging around and focusing. And that was when I woke up.
   I shuddered, pulling the blankets evern closer. On the other side
of the room, Risa was sleeping soundly, her mouth open slightly,
probably in response to the moist air here. Her hair was loose; it was
spread across her pillow and over her shoulders in soft waves.
   I turned away from her. I couldn't bring myself to lay back down
and close my eyes. If I can see that face with so much clarity when my
eyes are open, I reasoned, how much more clear will it be when it is
ALL that fills my sight?
   *****
   The next day, I was exhausted. I had gone to sleep after the dream,
but it was a fitful, restless sleep. I thought that maybe I would have
felt more rested if I hadn't slept at all. So I sat there as Tashi
brought out breakfast, staring into my mug full of water sightlessly.
   "Mei!" Tashi finally had to almost shout before I heard him.
   "Hmm?" I murmured, turning to him, startled. I got the impression
that he'd already tried getting my attention several times.
   His face transformed in less than a second from annoyance to worry.
"Are you alright?" he asked, his brow creasing. "You look like you
haven't slept...It's not because of Risa, is it?"
   For a brief moment, I was tempted to say that it was. But I didn't;
whether it was because I was just too tired to lie, or some deeper
sense of morality, I couldn't say. I yawned and shook my head instead.
"I just didn't sleep well last night, is all," I said, managing a weak
smile.
   He didn't believe me; I could see it in his face and eyes. "Well,
alright," he allowed. "But if you're having problems, come and see me.
No matter what it is, okay?" His eyes urged me to believe him.
   I nodded, holding his gaze until I yawned hugely, nearly dropping
my mug.
   "Good morning," Risa said quietly from the doorway. "I'm not
interupting anything, am I?"
   Tashi and I both looked over at her. She was dressed in Unit-00's
plug suit, just as I was dressed in Unit-01's. Her hair had been done
up in the two buns again.
   Tashi smiled at her; I just yawned and turned back to my food. "No,
not at all," he assured her. "Come, sit and have a bit to eat."
   With a timid smile, Risa sat down across from me. I tried not to
stare at her, but I was too tired to really care. I thought again how
the suit accented her slender figure...bolstering her where she needed
to be held up and flattening out areas that needed to be...I dragged
my eyes back to my mug.
   "So today," Tashi said towards the end of our tiny meal, "we should
continue fixing the entry plug and then do sync tests. And if we have
the time, try to fix the power supply or at least find out what's
wrong."
   I yawned hugely at the end of his day's plan. "Sorry," I muttered
as Tashi fixed me with an odd gaze. This is going to be a long day, I
thought
   *****
   It was all I could do to stay awake during the fixing of Unit-00's
entry plug.
   I didn't need to be in Unit-01 to help with the repairs of the
plug, though I would be when we could get around to fixing Unit-00
itself. The people who stole it had almost destroyed it again; I got
really mad that they would be so careless with such a lovely piece of
equipment every time I looked at it, leaning against one wall in it's
cage like the broken doll I'd had as a child, so I tried to keep my
back to it whenever I could.
   Most of the damage to the plug was not the damage I inflicted. The
only thing I had done, it seemed, was leave finger dents where I had
picked it up, and even that was not directly my fault. The material
was so weakened -- by what we couldn't tell, though Risa said they had
submerged the plug in several different solutions to discover what it
used as an oxygen suppliant; that made me even more mad -- that if I
had tightened my fingers even the tiniest bit more, I just might well
have shattered it. 
   So now we worked inside the plug and out to strengthen it up. Tashi
said it was a near miracle that Risa had been able to operate Unit-00
with it at all, it was that bad.
   Our entire day was dedicated to the plug. We had it ready to test
the next day by the time we went to bed. I fell asleep easily and
didn't dream.
   *****
   We got the power fixed first thing the next morning. More
acurately, Tashi and Risa did. I slept late, something I had never
done before.
   It felt so wierd, I thought, sitting in my bed and looking around
in a confused, half-asleep state. The area was silent, the only sound
a tiny dripdrip of water on the far side of the hallway.
   Water, I thought, trying to clear my mind of sleep-fog. I need a
bath.
   I took one, still puzzling over the absence of sound. The water was
cool against my skin, and I felt greatly refreshed after my bath.
After I dressed in my plug suit, I pulled my wet hair up in a tail
against the back of my head. Then I went to find Tashi and Risa.
   They found me. I was just entering C&C when they came down the
hallway behind me. Tashi called my name as they both ran to meet me.
Both wore excited grins.
   "We fixed the power," Tashi explained breathlessly. He must have
been running for more than just down this hallway "And we also found
something."
   "It's another entry plug," Risa burst out. "It's markings have been
erased by time, but I think it used to be the plug for one of the
white ones. The first number is almost guaranteed a '1'."
   I just stared at the two of them, wondering absently what kind of
picture we made, standing in a triangle in plug suits. All of a
sudden, I felt so useless. I had been sleeping while they had been
hard at work.
   "That...that's great!" I exclaimed, trying to put on a cheerful
front. "You didn't bring it back, did you?"
   Tashi shook his head. "It's half buried in rubble, and we couldn't
have done it anyway. You know how big they are. We wanted to ask if
you'd mind helping us get it out."
   "Of course not," I replied, trying to keep my voice neutral.
   "It's in a place where the Unit can't go," he continued, smiling
gratefully at me. "So Risa and I were going to go in and attach a
bunch of cables or ropes or whatever and then you can just pull it
out. Sound good?"
   So that's how it is, I thought in despair, though I nodded and
refused to let my inner feelings show. I'm just the muscle, rather
than the brain. Later I thought that that theory was unreasonable;
Tashi hadn't yet found an EVA that would accept him and Risa's was in
such bad shape that I wouldn't have let her take it out if she'd
wanted to. 
   Tashi showed me where the plug was on a map and directed me to the
nearest large space near it. He said that he and Risa would go around
through NERV to get to it and that one of them would meet me there to
make sure I didn't get lost. The space I was supposed to go was a
place I hadn't been yet, so I thought that it was kinda nice of them
to make sure, though at the time I was insulted that they would think
I could get lost.
   They took off in one direction while I went to the Unit. With the
power working now, it was very nice to sit in the plug, feel it twist
into place, activate it and have the LCL fill the plug up. I wondered,
as I tried to force my mind to accept the idea of breathing liquid,
where so much LCL came from. Tashi and I had found a tank of it
nearby, but it was hardly enough to keep the plug filled as many times
as I used it, and now it would go doubly fast with Risa around.
   It was nice to walk down a hallway without wondering if I was going
to have to blow the cable off and switch to internal power. I
experienced again -- as I did everytime -- the feeling of power that
came of sitting inside the Unit and controlling it's every move.
   Risa met me at the appointed spot. She waved and indicated that she
wished to say something to me, so I turned on my speakers and told her
to go ahead, adjusting the volume appropriately.
   "Tashi says that it might be a tight squeeze, but the cords only go
to here," she said, pointing inside the hole in the wall. "So he asked
me to tell you that you'll have to squeeze partly into here to get
them out." She disappeared back into the hole, waving me to follow.
   I stared at the hole for a moment, wanting to just laugh. I would
have to get my head and at least one shoulder in, and it looked as
though I could only get an arm in, much less the shoulder or head. The
shoulder had a huge blade on it, and my nose had a similar, thinner
one. I shrugged and laid on my side, determined to do the best I
could.
   I hated sticking my arm, palm up, into a hole when I couldn't see
what I was doing. I had no idea if I was going to knock out a support
pole or something.
   I lucked out. I was laying down for what seemed like forever. Then
I heard Tashi shout, "Now, Mei!!"
   Bracing my free hand against a solid wall, I grabbed the cord that
was looped around my fingers and yanked. The plug came free easily and
I even swung a bit on my hip as I exerted too much force than the
situation required.
   Amid the cloud of dust and grime, the plug was beat up. But the
most important parts of it were salvageable.
   Tashi actually cheered. "Good job, Mei!!" he yelled, his voice
echoing in the huge, empty room. The walls and ceiling shook,
showering plaster and cement down on us.
   "Oops," he said, almost sheepishly.
   "Get into the plug," I ordered through the speakers, lying on my
stomach and ejecting the plug. LCL poured out of the open door as they
clambered up the Unit's side. They crawled into the plug; I shut the
door as soon as I could and reactivated it. "Think like me, or don't
think at all," I told them, getting to my feet. Grabbing the other
plug and clutching it to my chest, I ran as fast as I could with two
extra thought patterns disrupting the performance of the EVA.
   Once back in the EVA bay, I stopped, set the plug on the floor and
locked the Unit into place. Before disengaging my own plug, I heard
the Unit angrily say, Get them out of me! Surprised at the vehemence
of the Unit, I wasn't allowed to dwell on it long as Tashi broke the
seal of the door.
   He stepped out first, gallantly offering his hand to first Risa and
then me as we exited the pod. I ignored the gesture; I was still kinda
mad at him, and I was perfectly capable of getting out on my own.
   "So now what do we do?" I asked, leaning over the safety railing of
the walkway around the EVA, looking down at the plug lying on the
floor far below. 
   "Well, since the plug for Unit-00 is finished, we should either
start the sync tests or see what we can do about fixing Unit-00
itself. I was thinking that pieces of one of the white Units would
work," Tashi said casually. "Almost all of them are so badly damaged
that I don't think they will be usable. Maybe we can salvage the outer
casing."
   "Sounds like a plan," I replied, starting to the stairs that would
take me down to the bay floor.

Will Unit-00 get fixed? Of course...but WHEN, is another story!!
--Luna
   

 KIZUtsuku KOTO wa kowakunai   dakedo keshite TSUYOkunai
 tada, NANI mo shinai mama de   KUyandari wa shitakunai
 Here we go! go! HASHIri TSUDZUkeru  DARE ni mo TOmerare wa shinai
 MIRAI no JIBUN e to   Give a reason for life   TODO ketai
     
I'm not afraid of getting hurt, but it's not hard to erase.
It's just the way it is without doing anything, and I don't want any regrets.
Here we go! go! Keep on running! No one will be able to stop us.
I want to give a reason for life to my future self.

--Slayers Next Opening Song "Give A Reason"



Here it is, minna ('specially those of you who have been waiting
anxiously since part 5 came out *wink* ) Short bit for me today; all
the usual copyright notices apply.

~*~*~*~*~*~

Neon Gensis Evangelion: At the End of the World

   Chapter 12

   The Dream came to me again. It's different this time, but I
remembered more of it. It started out in the EVA bay, only it looked
much different. It was cleaner, the walls an off-white. Or at least,
the part of the wall I actually noticed. 
   In front of me is a head; a gigantic head. It is purple, the eye
sockets dark, the eyes a bright yellow-white, the teeth huge. A long,
thin, flat pole rises off the front of the nose.
   "What..What is that thing?" I demand, my voice rising.
   "It is called Evangelion Unit-01," the blonde woman to my left
informs me in a professional tone. "It's man's last, best hope for
survival." 
   I can only stare at the giant head. "Is...is this my father's
work?" I ask.
   "Correct," comes the cold voice above me. My head snaps up. In the
window above the head is my father. He looks the same as the pictures
in the magazines about him. "We're moving out," he says then.
   "What? But Unit-00's still in cryostasis!" the brunette on my right
says. "No..You're going to use Unit-01?! But we have no pilot!"
   "One has just arrived," the blonde says calmly.
   "WHAT??" the brunette protests. "You can't be serious! He hasn't
been trained! Even Ayanami Rei took seven months to synchronize with
her EVA!"
   "We don't have a choice," the blonde replies.
   "Is that why you brought me here?!" I yell at my father, who stands
absolutely still. "Is that why you wanted to see me?"
   "Correct," he answers. I bow my head.
   "I won't do it," I say.
   The brunette bends over so that she looks more or less into my
face. "Shinji, we have no one else," she says. "You would be helping
all of mankind."
   "I said I won't do it!" I yell. I clench my fists at my sides.
   "Shinji..." she says sadly, rising.
   Moments later, white robed people wheel a stretcher in from a side
door. They stop and leave the stretcher in front of me. On it is a
girl, my age, with blue hair. She is wrapped in bandages; a bag of
plasma hangs from a pole attached to one corner of the bed. She stares
at me for a moment before rising slowly into a sitting position. She
obviously has to fight for each breath she takes.
   Just then an explosion rocks the building. The girl's stretcher
rolls away from me, and she falls off. I fall to the walkway, landing
hard on my rear end.
   "LOOK OUT!!" the brunette's voice calls out.
   I look up; several beams from the ceiling are falling towards me. I
raise my arms futilely to protect my head. I hear a splash of the
liquid surrounding the giant head. I hear the sound of one hard
material striking another.
   For several moments I just sit there, waiting for the final blow I
know isn't coming. When I realize it, I slowly lower my arms and look
up. The Evangelion's hand -- that's what I assume it to be -- is above
me. The beams from the ceiling have fallen away from me. It has
protected me.
   Startled, I look around. I see the blue-haired girl lying on the
walkway outside of the beams. The stretcher lies on it's side in front
of her.
   I get up and run to her, pushing the stretcher aside. I drop to my
knees beside her, lifting her up into my arms. She whimpers in pain; I
can only stare at her. Lifting one hand from where it rests on her
back, it is covered in blood.
   They were going to make her pilot it, I realize. In the condition
she's in...I musn't run away, I musn't run away, <b>I musn't run
away!!</b> I tell myself.
   "I'll do it!" I call to whoever's listening. "I'll pilot it."
   I woke up as suddenly as I did the first time. On the other side of
the room, Risa stirred. "What is it?" she mumbled. She couldn't
possibly be fully awake.
   "Nothing," I replied. "Just a bad dream."
   *****
   Tashi had us working on dismantling one of the white Units, the one
with it's head smashed in. Risa and I were hanging down at about it's
chest, supported by ropes and harnesses from the grated walkway above.
It was Unit-09, as far as we could tell. The designation on the arm
was mostly scratched out.
   I appreciated Risa more, since we started working together. She was
studying to be a doctor when she had been taken, and she had been at
the head of her class. She was actually working at a "high school" or
even a "college" level, she said. The words meant nothing to me, but
they seemed to impress Tashi. She had a vast knowledge of the kinds of
illnesses and injuries we were likely to experience. She even took
time one night to give us a full "examination". It felt much like what
the doctors had done to me when they first took me away, so many years
ago.
   "What do you think?" she asked me, crossing her arms over her chest
as she swung from side to side on the ropes.
   I studied the chest plate. "I think it's mostly useable," I
replied, also swinging on my ropes. "We can cut it off about...there,
and go all the way over to maybe...there." I pointed at the spots we
could use. "And down to about there."
   She nodded, dropping her arms to her sides. "Let's get to it then,"
she said, taking the flame-tool from her harness. "I'll take that
side; you take that one."
   I nodded, taking my own tool out. Then I swung myself closer,
grabbing onto the chest plate with the suction circles Tashi had found
in a box somewhere. I pulled my goggles down, activated my tool and
started cutting.
   It was strange; I was still wearing my thought sensors (sometimes
Unit-01 wanted to talk, for no paticular reason) and I could have
almost sworn that this Unit was crying out in pain. 
   A whisper: no, exultation. I put the thought aside; I had to work
now.
   We finished in about an hour; there was a lot that could be
salvaged. The plate fell away to the floor; it clanged loudly. Risa
and I raised our goggles and grinned at each other. Then we turned
back. "Gross," I said, staring at the stuff beneath. It was a pinkish
colour, but a really gross shade. It looked slimy and strangely alive.
   Risa was peering closer; "I'd like to study that," she said, more
to herself than anything.
   "Well, not right now," I reminded her. "We have to clean that plate
up."
   We loosened our ropes and slid down them to the ground, so far
below. We stared at the mess on the inside of the plate for a long
moment before plugging our noses from the smell. It was covered mostly
in a red slime with darker red traces. And it smelt like the group
latrines we'd had to share when we were still with the workforce. 
   "This is disgusting..." I started, trying to keep my stomach still.
   "Well, it smells bad," Risa agreed. "I wouldn't say it's
disgusting."
   I rolled my eyes. "Of course. You went to school. You were going to
be a doctor," I said, almost sarcastically. "Anyway, where should we
take this? It's kinda big for the Hole..." The Hole was where we got
our water from. It came from a hole in the ground and was fairly
clean.
   Risa regarded the plate thoughtfully for a long moment. Then she
turned and cupped her hands around her mouth. "HEY TASHI!" she
hollered across the bay. "WHAT SHOULD WE DO WITH THIS?"
   He looked up from where he was working with Unit-00's entry plug
and the one we had found the other day. He yelled back, "TAKE IT
OUTSIDE TO THE LAKE!"
   I threw my hands up in the air as I turned and started towards the
stairs that would take me to Unit-01. "Of course," I muttered to
myself. 
   We had found the lake about a month ago when I had been outside
doing something or another. It wasn't very big, or very clean, but it
was much larger than any body of water I had ever seen. Tashi said
that old maps indicated that it had been much larger once, but so much
time had passed since the maps had been made. That wasn't really the
point though. The lake was a large body of water.
   Unit-01 activated, I strode across the two steps it would take to
reach the plate, took the edges in my hands and heaved upward. It was
heavy, even with the Unit's powerful grip. Then I moved to take it out
to the lake.
   It was a long trip, especially with the chest plate of another EVA
in my arms, held across my own chest. I made it all the way there by
thinking about nothing in paticular, letting my thoughts wander.
   Unfortunately, that only brought back a recollection of the
previous night's nightmare. A half-remembered fragment, almost
insignificant but for the hideous face, seen through the screen I now
looked through as though reflected in a mirror.
   I open my mouth and scream before all passes into blackness.
   Startled, I almost dropped the plate. Luckily, it didn't really go
anywhere, and by then I had reached the lake.
   I took my time scrubbing the plate clean, wondering absently if the
water would make the Unit or the plate rust up like so much of the
metal we had found before. I didn't think it would, but I didn't know
for sure. I'm not the expert on Units or entry plugs. I'm just a
pilot.
   ...not just a pilot... came the almost unheard whisper.
   I stopped my scrubbing, wondering now if my ears were betraying me
and my head hearing things that weren't there. "Is that you?" I asked
the Unit's concious directly, but there was no answer. I shrugged and
continued on with what I was doing.
   Back in the bay, Tashi was in the middle of a sync test on Risa.
The plug was connected to a million different wires; he was in C&C at
the last working computer. I made a mental note to myself to take some
time out and try to get the computers back up. I didn't really realize
how much we depended on them.
   I practically tiptoed back into the bay, not wanting to disturb the
test. I set the clean plate down by Unit-00 and creeped back to my
cage, where I locked the Unit into place and ejected the plug. Then I
joined Tashi in C&C. The test was progressing quite well, by the look
of things. Her ratios were quite high. I was impressed.
   After a time, he stopped the test, took a few moments to let Risa
readjust to the normal pattern of her thoughts, and then turned to me,
smiling charmingly. "Your turn," he said.
   I barely registered what he said. Where did he get that smile from?
I asked myself. He was just full of surprises. Instead of commenting
on anything, I just nodded and headed down into the bay.
   Risa helped me get my entry plug out of loading position (that's
where the end was still inside the EVA so that all I had to do was
climb in and activate) and hooked up to the wires as Tashi
recalibrated the computer program for me.
   The test went smoothly, uneventful, as usual. The only thing
different was the stress levels Tashi was using; it was really no huge
feat to balance them out with a change in my thought forms.
   I knew the test was over when there was a sudden absence of all
stress. I waited for a minute or two to reorder my thought patterns,
before trying to get out of the plug.
   It wouldn't work. The crossbar over my lap refused to budge.
   "What the...?" I said to myself, staring down at the crossbar in
puzzlement.
   Not just a pilot, came the thought again, stronger this time. And
different. The mental voice had a different quality to it, not that of
the Unit-01 voice I was so used to hearing.
   I would have responded, but I was dumbstruck. The voice and even
all sense of the presence disappated rather quickly. Still confused, I
pushed at the crossbar again; it refused to move.
   "What's going on?" I whispered, more to myself than anything.
Almost desperately, I pushed at the bar again; this time, it moved,
and I was able to get out of the plug.

Chapter 13

   Kyle joined us days before I turned 15. Tashi had said that records
stated that only 14-year-olds could pilot the EVA's, but there was no
real record of anyone having their 15th birthday and continuing to
pilot. The records ended rather abruptly, even. There was a mention of
one 15-year-old being a pilot, but his Unit disappeared before it
could even be used. Tashi didn't see any real harm in letting me
continuing to pilot Unit-01. After all, it did respond to me better
than it did to Risa.
   I found Kyle when I was above ground one day, carrying a long
length of wiring for our newly-rebuilt computers. I needed to hook
them up to a power station on the surface. Risa offered to help, but
Unit-00 wasn't quite ready yet. It was fully rebuilt, but a lot of the
systems were faulty; or at least, that's what Tashi said. It reacted
violently to Risa, but that may have been because she had been out of
it for so long. It reacted even worse to me. I had been left with the
biggest migraine I'd ever had and was useless for almost a week
because I couldn't move of the pain.
   He was huddled in a corner of the power station, trying to stay
warm in front of a tiny, feeble and all but useless fire. It was
raining, as it always seemed to be, and he was in the driest corner of
the station, but he would have died if I hadn't found him. Even after
I'd brought him back, Risa had to fight for days to keep him alive.
She said he had pneumonia and hypothermia and a few other things I
can't remember. But he was in "critical condition" and needed to be
"isolated" for several days, until she was sure that he would be fine.
   My birthday this year came and went just like last year:
uneventful. Tashi wished me Happy Birthday and gave me a small chain
to wear around my neck. It wasn't anything special. Risa wished me a
Happy Birthday as well, but she was exhausted from having to fight
with Kyle's "vital signs" again for the third or fourth time that day.
   He did get better. It's not like his name was pinned to his shabby
clothes in plain sight, even if I had been able to read. He recovered
from the worst of his illnesses in no time, really, but spent several
more weeks getting his strength back.
   All three of us spent an hour or two each day with him, getting to
know him and letting him get used to us. Risa and I felt paticularily
protective about him; I had saved him from death on the surface, and
she had saved him from death down here. Tashi seemed indifferent.
Before long, he was walking around; slowly and with help, but he was
getting better.
   My dreams took a different twist soon after that. I made my way
through each day, dreading falling asleep because of the dreams from
Ikari Shinji's point of view, especially when each dream became longer
and I could relive several days in night. But as usual, I was so tired
that I fell asleep almost as soon as my head hit the pillow.
   The dreams changed.  
   "Midori!" Lina exclaims, sitting down sideways in the seat in front
of mine. "You cut your hair!!"
   "Do you like it?" I ask, tossing my shortened hair back from my
face.
   "It looks great!!" Jun says, sitting on a corner of the desk where
Lina sits. Lina leans forward, feeling my hair in her fingers. 
   "It feels so nice! What did you use on it?" she asks, sitting back
down. 
   "My aunt was in town last night," I explain. "She didn't want to
stay long cause of the robot incident, but she cut my hair for me and
then she put egg in it."
   "Egg??" they ask, slightly off from one another. I nod, my eyes
travelling in the direction of the door, seeing movement. It is the
transfer student.
   "I'm going to use egg on my hair," Jun declares. "How do you do
it?"
   "Scramble an egg, rub it in nice and good and rinse after ten
minutes with cold water. Simple," I tell them, spreading my hands in
conclusion. "Don't use hot water, or you'll have scrambled egg in your
hair!!" We start laughing.
   "Oh, did you hear the rumor yet?" Lina asks, excited. She leans
closer to me, grabbing Jun's arm to bring her in too. "Ayako told me
just this morning -- the transfer student is the pilot of that robot!"
   I woke up suddenly, as I always did these nights. My mind still
played the dream; whoever "Midori" was, she was not me, but that
wasn't anything new. Shinji wasn't me, either, and neither was the
EVA.
   I shivered, and it had nothing to do with being cold. Jun and Lina
were still etched in my mind, clear as day, and the feel of the
desk...the sights of the school...the people in the class...were all
still so real to me. I sighed and lay back down, pulling the thin
blanket up to my chin and curling up underneath it, my knees drawn
high against my body. After a while, I fell back asleep. Unlike
before, the dream continued.
   "Do it!" Jun says, pushing me gently in the direction of the
transfer student.
   "Why should I do it?" I ask, resisting her. "Why can't you or Lina
do it?"
   "Because, Midori," Lina says anxiously, pushing me along with Jun,
"we're too shy to do it. You've always been bolder than us put
together."
   That is a lie; for the first time I doubt our friendship. I turn to
face them; they look truly scared. I sigh resignedly. "All right, I'll
do it. But only if you two come with me."
   They nod, looking relieved. I turn again and walk down the aisle to
the transfer kid's desk, Jun and Lina clinging to my sleeves.
   "Hi," I said as I sat on his desk. He looks up at me, startled.
Then he reaches up and pulls the headphones out of his ears.
   "Uh...hi," he replies, dropping his gaze again.
   "I'm Midori," I say, sticking my hand out. "These are my friends
Jun and Lina." They smile nervously and wave.
   "Ikari Shinji," he replies softly, taking my hand in his. He raises
his eyes again.
   I am surprised, but not overly so. His eyes are blue. It is no big
thing, I suppose, for more and more kids to be born with lighter
coloured eyes; my own are green. To my knowledge, only he and Kensuke
have blue eyes in the class. Mine and Yui's are green. Ayanami's are
red.
   "Well, Shinji-kun, it was nice meeting you, see you later!!" I hop
off his desk and breeze back down the aisle to my own. 
   "Midori!!" Jun and Lina whine. "Why did you just leave like that?"
   "I don't know," I reply, shaking my hands in front of me. My heart
is fluttering in my chest. Just then, the class rep calls everyone to
attention as the sensei enters the room.
   *****
   "So what is it that you guys do around here?" Kyle asked, leaning
back in his chair. The only thing he still wore from his illness was
the bandage around his arm where he had been cut very badly.
   I yawned hugely before anyone could reply. My dreams took so much
out of me every night that the hardest time for me was waking up and
getting through breakfast. "Sorry," I said when they all turned to
look at me.
   "We're not really sure," Risa replied. She sounded and looked
tired, too. "So far all we've done is repair things."
   "I go outside every now and then," I supplied, yawning and then
apologizing again. "You were lucky that day."
   He bent his head to his chest and smiled. "Yes, I was," he agreed
softly.
   "How old are you, anyway?" Tashi asked. He was more awake than me
and Risa put together, but I kind of expected that of him. He was
always a morning person.
   "Last time I checked...um, 16 years old, I think," Kyle answered
thoughtfully. "It's hard to keep track of days when you're on your
own. After awhile, you just kind of forget."
   "Well, maybe you can help us get the computers back," Tashi
continued, almost regretfully, but I doubted he was being truly
serious about it. "You're too old to pilot."
   "Pilot?" Kyle asked, an utterly blank expression on his face.
   "An EVA," Risa told him, giving Tashi an odd look which I'm sure he
noticed and pretended not to. "The computers all say that only
14-year-olds can pilot them, but Mei is still doing fine. Unit-01
still responds to her."
   He looked so confused that I sighed and stood up. "Come with me," I
said, heading towards the door leading to the bay. "It'll make more
sense if you see them."
   "Don't forget about today's sync test!" Risa called after me.
   I walked down the hallway in an almost half-awake state. I was
aware of everything around me, but it was hard to focus on it. I heard
Kyle following behind me. His shoe soles were harder than ours. 
   "Where are we going?" he asked at one point as I started up the
flight of stairs to the walkway around the Units' heads. 
   "We're almost there," was all I said.
   He reacted much like I did when I first saw Unit-01 up close and
personal. The eyes made an impressive sight on their own, glaring
yellow in the dark sockets, the teeth gleaming in the dim light.
   "WHAT THE HELL IS THAT THING???" he demanded, clutching the railing
behind him tightly. His eyes were wide, and he looked like he was
having trouble breathing. 
   "Unit-01," I informed him, as though everyone in the world knew
that. "It's not so bad," I continued, much nicer. "I was piloting this
thing when I rescued you, only you were too sick to remember it." I
spoke of Unit-01 affectionately, as though it were my right arm or
something else I needed. I was struck with the idea that I did need
Unit-01. I honestly couldn't think of what I would do without it right
now.
   Tashi and Risa joined us at that point. Risa looked hard-pressed
not to laugh. "Come on, Mei," she said, waving me towards her. "We're
doing in-Unit tests today."
   I followed her around in behind Unit-01's head and got into the
plug. As I settled myself in the seat, taking a moment to yawn, Risa
leaned into the plug and started laughing.
   "He was hilarious!" she exclaimed. "Does everyone react to Unit-01
like that?"
   I shrugged. "I dunno. Not many people have seen it." I turned in my
seat and grinned at her. "Quite a few of those who have almost shit
their pants though." We both had a good laugh, and then Risa got out
of the plug, closing the door behind her.   
I sighed as the plug activated and twisted inside the Unit. I waited
as LCL filled the plug and inhaled it when I was supposed to. I closed
my eyes as the view changed, the viewscreens running through every
colour I could dream of and several I couldn't. When I opened them
again, I was seeing the bay and everything around me, including Kyle,
who was still on the walkway and still clutching the railing tightly
Risa and Tashi were nearby. I laughed to myself, and then shifted in
the cage. Kyle actually screamed when I moved the Unit.
   That only made me laugh harder and as I leaned over the crossbar
because I was laughing so hard, the Unit shifted forward a bit more,
stopped by the restraining bar over the chest. I had the unimanginable
pleasure of seeing him pass out. It always amused me to no end when
someone passes out, just because I move.
   "Let's get going!" Tashi shouted over Risa's gales of laughter.
"Mei, are you ready to go?"
   I flipped the speakers on. "You bet," I replied, trying to hide the
fact that I was laughing and failing miserably. I turned them off as
soon as I could, but Tashi could tell and rolled his eyes, turning
around and walking back towards C&C. "Come ON, Risa," he said over his
shoulder, "and bring him with you."
   I had time to organize my thoughts for piloting while they got back
to C&C. The Unit was strangely quiet. 
   "Begin test," Tashi said in my ear suddenly and plunged the Unit
into the test.
   It was like a smack to the head with a nice wide beam from the
ceiling. I almost passed out myself, but I managed to stay concious,
though I felt dazed afterwards. Then I had to concentrate on the test.
   It seemed to take forever, and it seemed to take a moment at the
same time. The reactions of my mind and body in the LCL were different
than an empty plug. All I was really aware of was the changing
pressure of the plug during the test.
   Once it was over, I came out of my trance-like state, aware of a
building pressure in the back of my mind. "Deactivate," I said
tiredly. Nothing happened.
   "Deactivate," I tried again, hitting a button on my control panel.
The viewscreens disengaged, but otherwise, nothing else happened. 
   I'll show you what I am capable of! That was the Unit, and it
sounded mad.
   "What?" I exclaimed, wondering what brought this outburst on. I
stopped talking as another memory flashed into my mind, so real that
all I could do was sit there in the seat and stare.

(start part 7)

Kakuii!!!! I'm really on the ball this week! I have to apologize for
the confusion factor in this part. There's a lot of dream sequences
involved. I've tried to mark Unit-01's thought-speech with *'s, but I
could have missed a few. All other dream sequences are written in the
present tense, rather than past. (ie: rather than "I did this..."
it'll be "I do this..." etc) Hope you enjoy it!!

Neon Gensis Evangelion: At the End of the World

Authors Note: In Chapter 14, Mei says "yamete" which, for all you
non-Japanese speakers, means "stop" or "don't" ^_^. Chapter 15
contains a smattering of what could be considered mature material and
may not be suitable for younger readers.

Chapter 14

   My systems shut down. "What on earth..?" I start. A red light
flashes in front of me and to the sides on my viewscreen. 'Activating
Dummy Plug System' they say.
   "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!" I scream. "I WANT CONTROL!!!"
   "You are not doing your job," my father says, calmly, coldly.
   "But there's a person in there!" I try to argue. "I can't kill
someone in cold blood!"
   "It is an Angel, and it must be destroyed," he tells me, and that
is the end of the argument.    My viewscreens activate again, only
this time I am an observer. I can only watch helplessly as Unit-01
reactes to the dummy plug. I am surprised at the intensity of it's
attack, as well as sickened. The Unit is ferocious, attacking the
Angel Unit-03 in a way that I could never bring myself to do. I try
the controls anyway, hoping that it will respond to me in some way and
stop. 
   "Stop it! Stop! Stop!" I repeat over and over again. "Stop! Stop
it!"
   Unit-01 rips Unit-03's arms off. A liquid much like blood sprays
out, coating all the buildings nearby with it. 
   "Stopstopstopstop!!" I am almost desperate now, shoving at the
crossbar that holds me in place. "Stopstopstopstopstop!!!"
   The entry plug in Unit-01's hand. "DON'T!!!" The fingers close.
   "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Only then does the Unit stop. After it has
taken someone's life.
   I only sit there in shock as recovery crews try to get inside the
entry plug of Unit-03, to try and recover the pilot.    
   "Shinji-kun..." Misato's voice enters softly into my ears.
   "Who's the pilot?" I ask softly.
   "I'm sorry, Shinji..," she says. "The pilot is...the pilot is..."
   She doesn't need to finish the sentence. I can see for myself who
the pilot is. His body is limp between the two mens' arms, his head
dropped down to his chest.
   Touji. My best friend. 
   I scream. 
   
   I came to myself again, feeling as though someone had just hit me
in the stomach with a board. "Why?" I whispered. "Why kill someone..."
I actually had tears slipping out from the corners of my eyes.
   *Because it was necessary.*
   That was the last thought of the Unit as the entry plug ejected and
drained of LCL.
   I was pretty useless for the rest of the day. The primal quality of
the memory was stuck in my mind. All I could really see was the Unit's
hand, crushing the entry plug of Unit-03 beneath it's fingers, over
and over again. Tashi eventually gave up on trying to get me to do
anything useful and productive, and Kyle just refused to talk to me,
probably because of what had happened with Unit-01.
   The highlight of the day was that Risa and Unit-00 finally
synchronized. We had been working for months to get Unit-00 fixed and
then it reacted violently, but now it would accept her. We had a long
moment of triumph that didn't fade until after we had gone to bed.
   I dreamed of Jun and Lina again. I was actually relieved that the
Unit's memory fragment didn't enter my dream, but I wasn't sure how
much more mild this dream was.
   *****
   Tashi had me and Risa testing together now. He and Kyle had somehow
managed to fix the system up to handle up to three testees at once to
do comparitive charts. This was the second time we had done it this
way, and it seemed to work. 
   During the middle of the test, the Unit assaulted me again, without
any warning. It wasn't as much a memory this time. It was more like a
simulation like the ones Tashi has shown us on the computer, where you
see things as though they were really happening, but they weren't.
   Dummy Plug System Activated the screens say.
   "What? No, they can't be!" I cry, swinging the controls around. The
Unit doesn't respond. I feel the shift in it as the dummy plug comes
into full activation, and it registers as unconcious. The Angel on the
viewscreen starts extending it's arms, preparing to attack.
   Unit-01 becomes the attacker, leaping at the Angel and beating up
on it. The Angel falters under the onslought. 
   "No....stop..." I whisper as I watch the Angel be all but ripped
apart by an out-of-control Evangelion. I swing the contols again. No
response.
   "Stop...stop....stop!!" I start to struggle to get out of the
plug's seat but it holds me fast and I can hardly move. With my hands,
I shove the controls violently from side to side, using my whole body
as leverage. One of them breaks off in my hand, bits of the metal and
wiring flying off into the LCL and suspending there for a moment
before drifting down.
   The Unit still doesn't respond to me and continues to destroy the
Angel.
   The other control breaks off in my hand. I stare at them in shock
for a moment before shaking them loose off my hands and pushing at the
crossbar. "Stop! Stop! Stop!" I feel so trapped. Outside, the Unit is
using a part of the Angel's body to crack the red globe set in it's
chest. Inside the globe I can see the curled form of another human
being. The globe's surface cracks.
   "YAMETE!!!" I scream. With all the strength in my body, the
crossbar gives way and breaks off into the LCL. The vision fades away.
   "MEI!!!" Tashi's voice interupts into my ears, a strange sound
after the silence induced by the Unit. I gasp as I see the hand
controls and the crossbar floating in the LCL in front of me. I can't
say anything, do anything, until everything hits me at once.
   "LET ME OUT!!!" I shrieked, getting out of the seat and pushing at
the door of the plug. "I HAVE TO GET OUT OF HERE!"
   I fell back into the seat as the plug was deactivated from the
outside and twisted out. The controls and crossbar sank to the bottom
as the LCL was drained out. I got back up as soon as it stopped moving
and started pushing at the door again. It opened and I all but leaped
out.
   Tashi was on the other side, along with a dripping Risa. I fell out
of the plug, hitting the walkway on my side and heard as well as felt
my arm pop in its socket. Before they could do anything, I struggled
to my feet and ran away from Unit-01.
   I stopped running when I could hardly breathe from exertion. I
didn't know where I had run to, but I once I took the time to look, I
recognized it as the bottom level of NERV we had taken the time to
look at. None of us had gone further. I sank down to the dusty floor,
closing my eyes and resting my head against the wall behind me to
catch my breath.  Once I did, I struggled to my feet and wandered
back.
   I wasn't really eager to go back. Unit-01 was more a nightmare now
than the haven it used to be. Tashi was sure to yell at me for
damaging the plug so badly. I honestly didn't think I was strong
enough to break the controls and crossbar off... Risa would want to do
a full examination and ask me a barage of questions to determine if I
was alright or not. Kyle...well, I didn't know about Kyle. Maybe he
would laugh at me for running away.
   I didn't know how long I had been gone, but I wasn't ready to face
them yet, so I went to my room, changed for bed and went to sleep. For
the first time in months, I slept without dreaming.
   *****
   Tashi didn't yell at me, which I was surprised at. He only calmly
asked what I had been thinking when I had damaged the plug. My eyes to
the floor, I told him that I hadn't really been thinking about
anything. He raised an eyebrow at me and was silent for the longest
time. I felt my tentative control break. I started crying.
   Luckily, he had sent the other two out, telling them to start
scrounging supplies for rebuilding my entry plug, which could take
awhile. Now, as I brought my hands to my face and covered it with
them, he got up from his chair and put his hands on my shoulders.
   "I'm not blaming you, Mei," he said softly. "All I want to know is
what possesed you to destroy the only plug for Unit-01 we can find."
He hesitated a moment longer and then awkwardly pulled me into his
arms.
   It was a long time before I could reply. When I did, it was barely
audible. "The Unit...it's showing me things I don't want to see."
   "What?" He sounded like he almost didn't believe me.
   I nodded against his chest. "It has a concious mind, but it's been
quiet for a long time now. I think it's been sending me the dreams
I've been having for months, and the other day it showed me what
happened when the previous pilot didn't live up to what was expected
of him. Yesterday...it just took over. I thought it was really
happening..." I took a deep breath to supress the lump that rose in my
throat, which prevented me from speaking for a few more moments. Tashi
was silent until I continued.
   "It was an Angel...whatever an Angel is...and Unit-01 just took
over all controls. It wouldn't respond to me at all. It was trying to
kill it...and there was a human inside...and it killed the
Angel...with no thought or regret...it just wouldn't respond!" I burst
into tears again. Tashi continued to hold me and gently stroked my
hair.
   "It's alright," he said. "You'll be okay. Do you think you'll pilot
Unit-01 again once we rebuild the entry plug?"
   
So much to ask right now... "I'll try," I said, doubtfully. "I won't
know until it's rebuilt."
   He smiled; I could feel it. "That's all I can ask," he said.

Chapter 15

   Lucky for us, I guess, that the entry plug was rebuilt in less than
a month.The most difficult part to rebuild and attach was the
crossbar. Part of it had been left on the plug's seat, and trying to
get the new half to match was a very hard task. It taxed the patience
of us all, but we somehow managed to hang on until it was done. The
power test finally had a green light. We cheered.
   Now I had to face my fears. I hadn't had a bad dream since the plug
had been ruined, except from the normal dreams most people had, the
ones that made next to no sense. Now, I put the plug suit on with the
realization that I would be getting back into the plug, and testing it
out. I stared at myself in our mirror for a long time.
   "You can do it," I whispered to myself. "I know you can."
   *****
   The LCL flowed up around my ears and over my head. I breathed in,
feeling the liquid fill my lungs. It felt good; I hadn't realized how
much I had missed that, although I knew I didn't miss getting it out
of my body afterwards.
   The viewscreen changed colours and then focused; everything was
much larger, as I had come to expect.
   "Here we go again," I said to myself, leaning back in my seat.
   The test began. Tashi wanted to see how long I could stay in the
plug without having to come out. He said something like it'll give him
an idea how long I can stay in the plug before they can rescue me
safely. I chose to block out the implications of that. He said that he
would make Risa take the same test soon as well.
   So all I could do was sit there with my thoughts and stare at
things around me. After awhile I fell asleep. I woke up once or twice.
The dreams came back. I was Midori again, and this time in a situation
I KNEW never happened. I could actually feel the Unit taking over my
mind this time, even though I was mostly asleep.
   "Shinji-kun...," I whisper, staring up at him.
   I stirred.
   "Shhh..." he breathes, his eyes dark. He barely moves,
   "No..." I muttered. "These...."
   "I love you Midori." He bends his head and presses his lips to
mine.
   "Aren't....mine...."
   I return the kiss, moving my arms around his back to pull him
closer.
   "Not...mine..."
   One of his hands travels into my hair, raking it back gently, while
the other travels down my side, pulling my shirt out of my school
skirt.
   "Not mine!!"
   The feel of his skin sliding over mine, our bodies locked in a
passionate embrace.
   "STOP IT!!!!"
   The Unit released it's hold on me. I woke up, shaking and
struggling against the crossbar of the plug. "THOSE WERN'T MY
MEMORIES!!!" I screamed, almost incoherent. "WHY WERE YOU FORCING THEM
ON ME?! THEY AREN'T MINE!!!!!!"
   *I wanted to know you.*
   The voice was so different, I stopped dead. "What?" I asked. It was
so hard to breathe. It was difficult to supress the panic I was
starting to feel. I could barely see, barely breathe...
   *I wanted to know you,* it repeated.
   "Who...who are you?" I whispered, holding myself absolutely still.
My stomach clenched violently with terror. The LCL, normally a clear
yellow-tinted liquid, was murky and clouded.
   *My name is...I don't remember my name. But I used to be
human...once...*
   More images of the dark haired boy from the false memories flashed
quickly through my head.
   "You're..." My voice was barely audible. "Let me out! I want out!
Please," I begged.
   *I only wanted to know you. I'm sorry if I made you unhappy. I
promise there'll be no more dreams.*
   "You're...you're Shinji..." The plug went dark again.
   *****
   I woke this time to Tashi's face right over me, and Risa's just
beyond his. "Mei, Mei, oh thank everything, you're alright," he was
babbling. He pulled me up tight against his chest, burying his face in
my hair.
   LCL still ran down my forehead, temple, cheeks and neck from my
hair, some of which was plastered to my skin. It itched. My vision was
fuzzy at the edges. I blinked slowly, trying to make sense of the
dizzying height of the Eva above me, it's head bent as if to watch me.

   *I wanted to know you.*
   "What...what happened?" I asked, my voice cracking. I closed my
eyes to stop my head from spinning. 
   "It was the Eva," Risa replied, placing her hand in mine. "It
wouldn't let go of the plug. We were doing another test -- do you
remember that?"
   A flash of the entry plug, open and waiting; Tashi's face and voice
as the door closed. "It'll be over soon."
   "Yes," I whispered. 
   "The Eva...it accepted the plug, but then it wouldn't let go. We
tried everything...even prying it open. You've been in there for
almost 16 hours...it wasn't supposed to go that long. It only just let
you go. The plug came out all on it's own."
   I opened my eyes to stare up at the Unit again. It was more in
focus. "Shinji...," I whispered, wondering if I actually said anything
at all. Then I closed my eyes and passed out.
   When I came to, I was lying on one of the long pallets Risa used in
her medical area. Kyle was sitting next to me, a bored expression on
his face. "Oh, you're awake," he said. He got up and walked to the
door, leaning out of it and hollering down it that I was awake.
   I tried to ignore him. There was something in his manner today that
I didn't like, but couldn't pinpoint. It became easy to ignore him
once I turned my mind back to the experience in the plug. 
   I guessed then that the dreams were a result of the turmoil inside
the EVA. I still remember the Unit telling me that I was lot like it's
son, Shinji. I can't understand why the Unit would switch it's
concious like that, and I suppose I never will. The memories of what
he was supposed to look like flashed quickly through my mind. He
reminded me of Tashi. Dark of hair and eye with a brooding, almost
pensive expression on his face...I shook my head clear of those images
and focused my mind on something else. Like how long I had been in the
plug.
   Sixteen hours, Risa had said. That was a long time. She also said
that it wasn't supposed to have gone that long. So just how long was I
supposed to be in there?
   Risa and Tashi came in then and took up chairs by my bed. "How do
you feel?" Risa asked right away.
   I smiled weakly. Just like a doctor..."Better, I suppose," I
replied softly. "Better than I did in the plug, at least."
   She nodded professionally. Then she dropped the medical front and
hugged me."Don't ever scare us like that again," she whispered in my
ear. She sounded like she was trying not to cry.
   I managed to get one arm up off the bed to drape it over her back
and hug her back. "I won't," I promised.
   She sat up, wiping at her eyes with the back of her hand. It was
Tashi's turn to hug me. He didn't say anything for a long time. When
he did, his voice was so rough with suppressed emotions that I
couldn't be sure of what he said. It sounded like, "I thought I'd lost
you."
   "What happened?" I asked, the events I could remember being all
mixed up in my mind. 
   Risa and Tashi looked at each other for a moment. "It's kind of a
long story..." Tashi started.
   "And I, as your doctor, am forbidding the complete hearing of it
until after you eat," Risa said firmly. "You need to wake up a bit
more; you've been asleep for a whole day.
   A whole day?! That's a long time! My mind shied away from the
possibilities of what I could have done in that time. "So what have
you been doing in that time?" I asked then.
   Tashi shrugged. "A lot of repairs again," he avoided the question.
"Unit-00 had a fit earlier today."
   My head swung around to Risa right away, my eyes focusing on her as
quickly as I could get them too. She was showing the signs she had
displayed earlier when Unit-00 had fits with her in them. A certain
tension and weariness in her stance and face, the way her eyes darted
about nervously...I felt sad that the Unit would subject her to that
after they had finally synchronized.
   "Any idea why?" I inquired, still watching Risa, though I already
knew the answer. None of us had any idea why Unit-00 had fits.
   "Mei, does Unit-01 talk to you?" Risa interupted.
   I was a bit surprised. "Sure he does," I replied, almost without
thinking about it. 
   She smiled. "I knew it! Unit-00 talked to me today. It's the first
time it's ever done that...Wait a minute! He?"
   It was my turn to smile. "It's kind of a long story," I explained.
"I, as your patient, forbid the retelling of it until I hear
everything else I missed while I was asleep."
   She laughed outright at her own words thrown back at her. "All
right, I'll wait and suffer until you finally get around to telling
me."
   I stuck my tongue out at her. 
   Some time later, both of us had said our pieces. I had woken up
just in time for dinner, apparently, and they were quite ready to stay
up for a while longer with me and keep me entertained. 
   It turned out that the test had run hours over the time Tashi had
slotted for it. He, Risa and Kyle had all been keeping an eye on the
monitors to make sure that I was alright. They had taken turns to keep
themselves awake after staring at a screen for hours on end. They had
tried everything to get the Unit to release the plug when my life
signs started wavering and eventually dropping, rather rapidly.
Nothing had worked. Then it had just released it all on its own. 
   That led into my story. I told them how Unit-01 had talked to me
almost since the first day we had "met" and how it was the mother of
the previous pilot, Ikari Shinji. Then I told them about the dreams
and detailed a couple in, glazing over most and not mentioning a lot
of them at all. It all ended with Shinji being the Unit's concious
rather than his mother's. And then I had been asleep since then, so I
didn't know anything else.
   "That's the wierd thing," Tashi said when I had finished. "We
weren't anywhere near Unit-00 when it had a fit. It activated all by
itself and started pounding the walls. It didn't last long of course,
and only it's knuckles were scratched a bit. But Risa just dropped to
the floor, clutching her head and clawing at the thought sensors." I
had noticed a long time ago that only me and Risa wore thought sensors
almost all the time. Tashi had stopped wearing his when he found out
that he would never be a pilot. I remembered something then.
   "Has that white Unit we cut the chest plate off for Unit-00 done
anything?" I asked suddenly. They looked surprised. 
   "No..." Tashi said slowly. "What's that got to do with anything?"
   I thought over what I wanted to say so it wouldn't come out in a
big mess. "When I was cutting the plate, I thought it was making some
kind of thought noise that was pain, but it said 'exultation'. I don't
know...maybe I'm going crazy that the Units can talk to us if they
want to, as long as we're wearing the thought sensors."
   "No, it's a good theory," Tashi said thoughtfully, tapping his chin
with a forefinger and staring off at nothing.
   "It said that it didn't like Unit-01," Risa confided, leaning close
to me. "It said that it wanted to get away as fast as it could."   
It was my turn to be thoughtful. "I think there was a record on the
computer before that file got lost that Unit-00 reacted badly to
Shinji," I told her slowly, my brow wrinkiling with the effort of
thinking back so far to files long beyond our reach. "I bet if we were
to switch for a day and take compatiability tests, I'd do horrible in
Unit-00. It didn't like me the first time. I'm sure that Unit-01 would
have no problem with you."
   Not long after that, I felt tired again and had to go to bed.
   
-------------------------------------------------------

One note for these two chapters: They contain extremely mature subject
matter. I was even somewhat reluctant to put it in, but it's
necessary...I apologize to anyone who has a problem with this. Because
of what happens, this part is NC-17, and I definitely don't recommend
it to anyone under that age. Please feel free to Lekka Shien me.

All copyright notices apply
-------------------------------------------------------

Neon Gensis Evangelion: At the End of the World

Chapter 16

   What are you doing? Unit-01 asked curiously.
   I turned the welding tool off and shoved the face guard up onto my
head, sighing in exasperation as I wiped sweat off my forehead. "At
the moment, nothing!" I told it acidly. I was glad that I was the only
one working in the EVA bay right now. "I can't do anything when you're
talking to me, because I can't risk having you in my head when I'm
attempting to work with such a dangerous tool!" I shook the welder
almost angrily. "So just be quiet and let me fix you up, alright?"
   No reponse. I sighed again, slammed the face guard down and got
back to work. 
   Unit-01 and I had had a bit of an accident, only one in a long
series of accidents. It wasn't major compared to the plug incident,
but it was serious enough to warrant me having to get up super early
and do what I could to fix it.
   We had been above ground again, looking for supplies, and I had
gone by the lake. I was not prepared at all to have found a few
archaic pieces of artillery waiting for me. They looked like big boxes
attempted to be cut into a rounder, ovular shape and rolled about on
nice long treads that were in their death throes of productive use.
Huge guns were attached to the fronts. They had fired on me. None of
the shells did damage when they hit, but they did disrupt my thought
patterens or the relays in the Unit to them enough that I tripped and
stumbled into several buildings and the remainder of a rather
formidable wall. Unit-01's shins had been scraped fairly badly and I
needed to replace a toe plate. I was doing the toe plate now, provided
that the Unit could keep from talking to me long enough for me to get
anything productive done.
   As it was, I didn't really want Tashi, Risa or Kyle finding out
that I'd fallen like that. Tashi was likely to give me a Look that
said, "You should be more careful." Risa would check to see if I was
alright, and truthfully, my back did kind of hurt. I must have twisted
when I fell. Kyle would laugh.
   I finished the toe plate as the lights in C&C came on; I packed up
the tools and put them back in their closet. By the time I had gotten
that done, Tashi had come down to the floor level and was waiting for
me.
   "What are you doing up so early?" he asked, yawning. 
   I grinned at him. "Minor repairs," I replied. "The air above is
positively acidic."
   He only stared at me, the expression on his face unreadable. Then
he reached out and placed his hand on my shoulder. "Looks good," he
approved, which was followed quickly by a yawn. "It's too damn early,"
he complained.
   "Then what are you doing up?" I asked.
   "Couldn't sleep. Besides, we have those joint tests today." Today
was a special kind of test. Tashi wanted to see the plug suits really
affected our performance in the Units or not. "Come help me set up
before the other two get up." He turned and started across the bay
again. I followed.
   We worked in silence for a long time. It was nice, just the two of
us, working together just like we used to before Risa had joined us.
There was this sense of infinite friendship between us at this moment
as we worked; the knowledge that we would always have this special
affinity for each other, and that nothing could really destroy it.
   Kyle was up next; he was always a zombie in the morning, so he
didn't even try talking to us right away. Risa followed soon after,
and she was all ready to help with the final preperations.
   Finally, the test was set up and we took the time out then to have
some breakfast and relax before starting. Kyle was more sociable, and
while Tashi and Risa discussed something about the Units, he started
talking to me.
   It wasn't as though we hadn't talked before. It was that we hadn't
as much of an opportunity to talk since he had gotten better.
   "So what's the plan?" he asked. His eyes held mine.
   "We're going to see if plug suits really affect our performance in
the EVA's," I said, managing to get my gaze back to what I was eating,
so I missed the gleam that stole into his eyes. He hid it very well; I
only caught a glimpse of that look when I turned back to him. I
wondered if I had even seen it at all.
   He laid his hand on my arm; it lingered there as he spoke, leaning
closer to me. "I'm sure you'll do fine," he whispered, an odd grin
stretched across his face.
   The test took place later that morning. Risa and I had to strip
down completely in the curtained off area Tashi and I had prepared,
and then relax ourselves as completely as we could before getting into
the entry plugs.
   I remember this, the Unit -- Shinji -- said.
   That's fantastic, I shot back at him, not really knowing if I was
annoyed at him or just plain annoyed.
   It was an uneventful test, at least for Risa and I. All we had to
do was sit there like any other test. Tashi sounded completely neutral
when he said we could get out, so I couldn't even speculate as to how
the results turned out.
   Risa and I had to take a bath afterwards. The LCL felt so slimy
against our bare skin and in our hair that we just ran straight to the
bath room. We took a nice long soak in our "tub", which was really
just a remnant of a tub, but a fairly large one, so we could both sit
in it at the same time. It was a little crowded, but we managed.
   Risa got out when she felt sufficiently clean; I stayed longer,
wanting to relax a bit more. Plus I was feeling a little bit tired
now. I tried not to fall asleep in the tub, but I did.
   Kyle found me; I don't know how much later. It didn't feel like it
had been very long at all, but it could have been.
   "Hey, sleepyhead, wake up," he said, shaking me by the shoulder.
   I jerked awake, splashing water out of the tub. The water left was
cool, so it must have been a fairly long time since I had fallen
asleep. "Huh? What -- ?"
   "Relax," he assured me, laughing. "Tashi said you were up super
early, so he said it would be okay for you to sleep for awhile,
although when Risa told him where you were likely to be sleeping, he
didn't think it would be very nice for you to drown. So he sent me."
   I was uncomfortable without really knowing why. Why couldn't Tashi
have come, or Risa? Then I remembered that they were still doing final
repairs on Unit-00. It had had a bulkhead or something equally heavy
fall from the ceiling onto it's shoulder. The long plate rising off
the shoulder was bent inwards.
   I got of the tub then, reaching down and pulling the plug out. The
water drained downwards with a slurping sound. I didn't really mind
that Kyle was still in the room.
   My body caused me no shame. I had spent too many years in the ranks
of the work force and big communal baths -- when we got them -- to be
ashamed of it. I thought about that as I dried myself off from my bath
with the scrap of sheet we used for a towel.
   Tashi had always respected my privacy, even when we very small.
When we had been chained together, he had always looked the other way
when I needed to go to the bathroom and I had done likewise for him.
We had least helped each other with our baths without feeling
guilty...
   I stopped drying myself and looked down at my body. I was very
slender, but that was to be expected. I had been underfed my whole
life -- poor feeding did not do wonders for one's muscle structure.
The best thing was, since leaving the work force, we had eaten better,
and the flesh around my ribs had filled out. I always thought they had
looked rather silly, poking out like they had been.
   Tashi had once said that I was small and compact -- I could believe
him. I had a narrow waist and hips, my arms and legs were stronger
than they appeared, which wasn't saying much, and my breasts were very
small -- at least they weren't squished by the hard chest plate of my
plug suit. I didn't think that I was anything special, or any great
attraction (at least physically) for Tashi or Kyle. With a shrug, I
began rubbing the towel over my wet skin again.
   "You do yourself wrong to hide that body beneath clothing all the
time," Kyle said from behind me, unexpectedly.
   I stopped, drawing the towel closer about myself instinctively. He
was sitting on the egde of the drained tub, his eyes gleaming in an
unsettling way.
   I laughed shortly after a moment, hoping that I didn't sound like I
was forcing it. "You've got to be kidding me," I said, turning my back
to him and unwrapping the towel slowly to continue drying myself off,
although more cautiously. "I don't have the kind of figure Risa has."
   He came up behind me, placing his hands on my shoulders. "You don't
need the kind of figure Risa has," he said, his voice too near to my
ear for any kind of comfort. "You're fine just the way you are," he
whispered in my ear, using one hand to pull my wet hair away from my
skin.
   I tensed, though I couldn't tell if it was in nervousness or
anticipation. His breath tickled my ear and neck, and a shiver ran
over and through my body. "What makes you say that?" I asked, drawing
the towel closer again.
   He slid his hands down my arms to where my hands were clasped
together, between my breasts. "Because you're fine just the way you
are," he repeated before touching his lips to my neck. His hands slid
off mine and onto my breasts, rubbing them through the damp towel.
   I gasped, my body arching of its own accord away from Kyle. I
couldn't tell if it was from fear, revulsion or actual need.
   "Kyle, stop it," I said, trying to slip out underneath his arm.
   I hadn't counted on him moving his arms to keep me in his embrace.
   He clamped a hand over my mouth, the other resting on my waist
tightly as he pressed me back into him. "You're not going to fight me,
are you, Mei?" he whispered hoarsely, his breath tickling my skin.
Eyes wide, I nodded. His hands hurt.
   "Good," he answered shortly and then licked my cheek.
   I felt sickened and twisted my face into a mask of disgust. "Kyle,
please, stop!" I begged, trying to twist away again.
   "Be quiet, Mei," he ordered roughly, one hand pulling away the
towel I still held to my body. Exposed, I wanted to cover up for the
first time in my life.
   "Oh yeah," Kyle breathed, his hands more roughly over my body. One
hand came up to play with my breasts again as the other travelled down
to stroke my thigh.
   I wanted to throw up. I felt violated and like I had somehow
brought this down upon myself.
   When his hand came up between my legs and his fingers began to
stroke me at my most secret self, I forgot about not fighting him and
tried to get away as quickly as I possibly could.
   "Help me!" I screamed at the top of my lungs. "Tashi! Risa! Someone
please!" That was all I was able to get out before Kyle cursed and
came around in front of me, backhanding me violently.
   "You little bitch!" he snarled as I fell beneath the force of his
blow. I had almost managed to stay upright, but my foot slipped in a
puddle of water and I crashed to the floor, landing on a piece of the
wall no one had gotten around to picking up yet. It dug deeply into my
hip and I knew that there would be a bruise there. I twisted to remove
the piece, tossing it aside and forgetting about Kyle for a moment.
   He didn't stay forgotten for long. He was in front of me again in
moments, placing his knee between my legs and right up against my
body. "You like that, slut?" he growled, shoving his knee harder
against me; I cried out in pain. "You think I don't notice the way you
look at Tashi, the way you move your body when he's around? Here's a
news flash, whore -- he's too good for you. You are not worth the
flesh you live in and call a body. All you are good for is looking for
is looking pretty in that suit you're so fond of. And it's no wonder
you like it so much. It was made for a boy, right? It's the only one
that would fit you properly with this figure of yours." He waved his
hand over me and then slapped me a few more times before grabbing my
breast again.

Chapter 17

   "Someone, please! Help me!" I screamed again. It turned into a
wordless scream as his mouth closed over my breast and he bit it
savagely.
   "Didn't I tell you to be quiet?" he said, slapping me again. He got
up on his knees without removing the one against my body, undid his
pants and shoved them down. I was frightened by the sight of him; he
used the pause in my struggle for freedom to his advantage, pinning my
shoulders down, removing his knee and then forcing himself inside my
body.
   I screamed. His entry hurt. "How many times do I have to tell you
to shut up?" he yelled, covering my mouth with one hand. "Jeez, you're
tight," he continued in a snarl, pulling himself almost out of my body
and then shoving back inside. "Why hasn't anyone ever fucked you
properly before?"
   I felt like I was on fire. Every nerve screamed in protest to his
actions. I started to twist beneath him, hoping to get my head free at
least so I could scream for help again.
   "Would you hold still!" he demanded, shifting so he was covering my
body with his own. I doubled my efforts, trying to throw him off.
"Hold still!" he started again, and then literally flew sideways.
Unfortunately, the blow wasn't hard enough to remove him from my body.
   I looked up; Tashi stood over us, a long piece of wood in his hands
and a furious expression on his face. Kyle looked up too, and snarled
primally.
   "Get off of her," Tashi said calmly. That frightened me. Tashi was
always calm, but when it was coupled with that expression, I wanted to
run and hide.
   Kyle thrust into me again before removing himself completely from
my body on the outward stroke. His exit hurt just as much as his entry
and my head swam in pain. He stood up, wrapped his hand around himself
and quickly moved it back and forth until he ejaculated, in front of
Tashi, and all over me. The stuff was sticky, and I did throw up then,
rolling quickly to one side and emptying my stomach of what little was
in it. Kyle shoved himself back inside his pants, did them up and
faced Tashi. "Just want her for yourself?" he said mockingly. "Here's
a tip for you -- she's a lousy lay."
   Tashi's expression soured more and he whacked the unsuspecting Kyle
full in the face with his stick. Kyle went down with a thud! Tashi
turned to me, still angry.
   I shrank back, crossing my arms tightly over my chest and drawing
my knees high, turning away from him at the same time. Then Risa was
beside me, throwing a blanket over me and wrapping me up in her arms.
   "Snap out of it, Tashi," she said angrily. "Mei was not a willing
party to that."
   His expression didn't change for a moment; then it slowly softened,
and he lowered his stick, dropping it once the end hit the floor. He
sank to his knees and crawled across the distance between us, going
opposite to Risa and sliding his arms around me.
   "I'm sorry, Mei," he whispered, and he sounded like he was crying.
"I am so, so sorry."
   I started to cry as well, the full impact of Kyle's actions finally
hitting me. Mine were understandable; Tashi's weren't. Both of them
held me, not saying a word, but giving me the comfort I needed right
then.
   "Are you hurt?" Tashi asked after a few minutes. "If he hurt you, I
swear I'll kill him."
   I couldn't look at him. Instead, I just pulled the blanket down to
expose my breast. There were sluggishly bleeding wounds where Kyle had
bit me. I knew I would have several bruises, some very nasty, in a day
or two, and I wasn't sure if I would ever walk normally again. His
entry and continued thrusting had left me burning down there. I pulled
the blanket up to my waist and saw the trails of blood streaking my
inner thighs.
   "I'll kill him," Tashi stated bleakly, pulling me closer to him and
burying his face in my wet hair.
   "Well, do that then," Risa said. "I'm taking Mei to get cleaned
up." She forced Tashi's arms down and pulled me to my feet, wrapping
the blanket fully around my body and leading me away.
   We left the bath room and were going down the hallway to our
medical area when I stopped walking and just dropped to the floor,
clutching the blanket close and crying hysterically.
   "Mei, c'mon, get up," Risa urged, tugging at my arm. "Kyle's just
an arrogant Easterner who needed to be taught a lesson. He's not worth
it."
   "It's not that!" I cried. "I just feel so...so wrong...and the look
on Tashi's face after he clobbered Kyle..." I started to cry beyond
the capacity of being able to speak through it.
   "Oh, Mei, why are you worried about that?" Risa knelt beside me and
hugged me again, resting her head comfortingly on my back. "Tashi was
just upset that he let Kyle get to you before he could warn you. He
thought you could take care of yourself, but where Kyle's
concerned...You should have seen the look on his face when he heard
you screaming. We were working on Unit-00 and he just froze, dropping
his welding tool all the way to the bay floor and dashing off like his
ass was on fire."
   I was surprised to hear Risa use that paticualr word; she wasn't
the type to use slang very often, and almost never did. But what
surprised me more was her story of Tashi's actions. I hadn't thought
that he cared for me that much...
   I slowly looked up at her; she nodded to my unspoken question. I
closed my eyes and then wiped the tears on my cheeks away with the
back of my hand. "Okay, then, let's get to med." I let her help me up
and down the hall to the medical area.
   It didn't take long to get me cleaned up. The blood and ejaculate
washed away easily, leaving only the bite marks on my breast, the
bruises on my face and the ache between my legs to attest to Kyle's
rough handling of me. Risa was very professional, and she pronounced
me fit to wear the plug suit in three days. Until then, I was to wear
loose shirts, protective wrapping about my breasts, and skirts. I
didn't mind; I felt sore enough that I didn't want to even think about
using the plug suit just yet. She even brought out clothing that I
could wear until then.
   I had just finished getting dressed and was sitting down slowly --
and rather painfully -- on the bed there when Tashi quietly knocked on
the door and entered cautiously, carrying a steaming mug in his hands.
   "Are you alright?" he asked, a slow flush coming over his face. He
approached me almost as if I had some sort of disease that he didn't
want and sat down next to me on the bed. "Here, I brought you
something to drink," he added, offering me the mug.
   I made a ghost of a smile and accepted the mug with an almost
inaudible, "Thank you." I sipped at the contents and found that it was
apple cider, my favourite hot drink -- and the hardest one to find. We
sat there in silence for a few moments, until he turned to me and
began talking.
   "Mei, I...," he began awkwardly. "That is, I...I mean...oh damn
it!" He leaned forward and covered his face in his hands. When he
looked up again, he was bright red and there were tears in his eyes.
"Mei, I'm sorry that I let Kyle do that to you," he whispered, his
voice sounding as though he had to force it out. "I...I'm sorry it
took his rape of you to realize how much I care for you." He turned
away from me then.
   I nearly dropped the mug, staring at him in amazement. "Tashi,
I...," I started, interupted when Risa came back into the room,
carrying a small jar of something white.
   "Mei, I want  -- oh." She stopped talking when she saw Tashi,
though she didn't stop walking towards us. "Tashi, could you leave us
for a moment?" she asked, cocking her head at him. He nodded and got
up, leaving the room quietly.
   Risa gave me the jar and gave me instructions on where and when to
use it. "We'll see how you're doing in three days," she said, wrapping
me in a hug again. "I'm not going to force you into the entry plug of
Unit-01 until you're ready to. Promise me that you won't go back until
you think you can handle it, alright? I don't know how  you're going
to hold up under the mental stress of that position right now."
   "Promise," I got out around a closed throat.
   I left after that. Tashi was waiting just outside; he offered his
hand. "I'll help you back to your room," he suggested. I took it with
another ghost-smile. He led me slowly down the hall, and I was
grateful that he did. I moved slowly, and as though I had a log
between my legs.
   It took awhile to get to the room I shared with Risa; when we
reached it, Tashi led me inside, and helped me sit on my bed. Then he
gently pushed my still-damp hair back from my face and looked me
calmly in the eyes. "Need me for anything else?" he asked.
   I couldn't even smile. "Stay with me tonight, please," I whispered,
feeling tears gather in my eyes again.
   He sighed and closed his eyes briefly. "Anything," he said as he
opened them.
   I got up then, handing him my mug and heading slowly into the
washroom. "Doctor's orders," I explained, turning on the light and
closing the door.
   I leaned against the door, fighting a losing battle against the
tears that threatened to spill over. Then I managed to get a hold of
myself, pulled the jar of cream out of my pocket, set it on the
counter, pulled the skirt off and sat on the toilet to administer it.
   I nearly screamed in pain as the cool cream touched my flaming
skin. I did draw a sharp breath and had to hold it for a few long
seconds before I could continue. When I left the washroom, I was in
tears. Tashi leaped up from the seat he had taken on my bed and set
the mug down hurriedly, rushing to my side. "Are you alright?" he
asked anxiously, taking my elbow in one hand and placing the other on
my opposite shoulder.
   "I will be," I answered, my voice tight with pain. "I was led to
believe that first times weren't quite that bad."
   He looked confused for a moment; then his eyes flashed angrily.
"Most first times didn't involve rape," he answered, helping me sit
down again.
   I lay down on my bed and turned away from Tashi. He pulled my
blankets up over my body to my shoulders, smoothing them down around
my torso. "I'm here, Mei," he whispered. "I'm not going to leave you."
   It was several hours still before I could sleep, and when I did, my
dreams were filled with nightmares of Kyle and the horrible act he had
commited on me today.
   *****
   They let me sleep in, which was nice, I guess. I didn't really like
sleeping in. It went against everything I had ever been taught.
   As soon as I thought that, I started to cry again. It didn't matter
whether I'd had the chance to sleep in or not, all that mattered was
that they had left me alone. I was by myself right when I didn't want
to be. 
   Remembering Risa's instructions, I got myself out of bed, feeling
even more sore and stiff than I had yesterday. I made my way to the
bathroom, applied the cream, and took a long, good look at my
reflection in the mirror.
   Bruises had formed on my cheeks. They were an ugly purple colour
that was black in the middle. The outsides of the bruises were just
starting to turn blue. To top it all off, my face was red from my
recent crying, and the undamaged skin was puffy, though whether it was
from tears or the abuse, I wasn't sure. Tears formed in my eyes again.
It was so hard to believe...just yesterday morning...I had felt so
safe...
   Then I noticed the pair of scissors on the countertop. Risa must
have left them there, though for what purpose I couldn't imagine.
Almost as if I couldn't stop myself, I reached over and grabbed them.
As I looked back at myself, I wondered what I would do with them. I
couldn't kill myself, even though I really wished I could. There was
just no way I could leave Tashi and Risa...or Unit-01.
   I caught sight of my hair, uncombed since it had been washed the
day before. The more I stared at it, the more it seemed like the
perfect target. My hair had been my only vanity.
   I grabbed a handful, and began sawing away at it with the scissors.

                                  ***


All thoughts/Unit-01 speaking are marked by **. if there's any
empahsized words marked the same way, gomenasai!! Anyone who wants
these archived or can't get the files from the server or just missed
some, please email me. i'm thinking of starting a kind of ML just for
you ppl ^-@

All copyright notices apply.

-------------------------------------------------------
Neon Gensis Evangelion: At the End of the World
by Luna Ayanami (ayanami@highlandgrey.com)

Chapter 18

   Risa and Tashi came back as I cut the last long piece of my hair
off. By that time, I had sunk to the bathroom floor, in tears as each
handful fell away. So I sat on the cold floor, surrounded by uneven
chunks of my hair and the scissors lying beside me.
   "Mei!!" Tashi called, though it was largely unecessary. Risa was
the one who found me, leaning against a wall with my arms wrapped
around my chest, head down and crying almost hysterically. She rushed
to my side and hugged me to her, rocking back and forth and singing
softly. "It's alright, Mei," she whispered. "It's okay. We're here for
you."
   Tashi stood just inside the door, staring at us as though he didn't
know us. Then he slowly bent down and picked up one of the pieces of
my hair. "Your hair..." he said softly.
   Risa ran her hands over my head. Then she pushed me into a sitting
position, brushing the hair back from my face. "I like it," she said.
"It suits you. Here, let me straighten it out a bit." She reached for
the scissors, but I stopped her.
   "Don't," I whispered. "It's fine."
   She stared at me. "Alright. That's the way you want it..."
   "It is..." My eyes came to rest on Tashi's feet. I couldn't look up
at him. I just couldn't. I was afraid of seeing that look on his face
again, since I was almost at the same level as I had been yesterday
when he had rescued me. "Tell me you didn't kill him," I whispered
then.
   "Huh?" was their response.
   I got to my feet slowly, wincing with pain. Tashi had grown a lot
in the last year. I didn't even come to his shoulder anymore. "Tell me
you didn't kill him," I repeated, more forcefully.
   Tashi looked at the floor. "I didn't," he replied sullenly. "I
wanted to...but I couldn't. He's in a locked room right now. I want
one of the Units to take him far, far away from here." He looked up at
me then, raising his eyes only enough to meet mine. I backed away,
taken with a sudden, uncontrollable fear.
   "I can't do it, Mei," he said softly, almost so soft that I didn't
hear him. "I can't be anything like him..."
   I ran from the room, dodging past Tashi and running down the hall
as fast as I could.
   *****
   I didn't know where I would go. NERV was so big. I remembered the
bottom level of the complex, but I wasn't sure I wanted to go there. I
looked down at my skirt and loose tunic. Tears gathered in my eyes.
   **Why couldn't I see it?** I asked myself as the tears slipped out,
leaving trails of hot water down my cheeks. **Why couldn't I see him
for what he was?**
   I didn't have an answer, and maybe I didn't want one.
   Instead, I found a tiny hole in the skirt, dug my fingers in to
make it bigger and tore the skirt off all around, so that it was
nearly half as long. Now, it hung raggedly at mid-thigh, rather than
below-the-knee. I tore the sleeves off the shirt and tucked it into
the waistband. I found a lamp nearby in a supply closet that we had
left there in case of an emergency and one of us was stuck there; the
battery was low, but it would last for an hour or three. I set off
down the hall towards the stairs that would take me down. 
   The lower level was black. Only a single beam of light weakly
illuminated a cross. A figure was nailed to it. Without thinking, I
walked down the last steps, and heard the splash of liquid before I
felt it. 
   I turned my lamp on; the liquid was the same yellow colour as LCL.
I bent down and was overpowered by the smell. The smell of blood.
   I straightened and thought for a moment. Wiping tears angrily from
my eyes, I continued down into the LCL-filled room.
   It was hard. The ceiling was high; higher than my lamp light could
reach. I sensed that at one time, this room had been filled, floor to
ceiling, with LCL. Now, it was about maybe half full, which was still
a lot. I had absolutely no sense of dimensions in this room. Even so,
the floor soon disappeared beneath my feet and I had to swim my way
around. I was glad the light was waterproof, or at least as waterproof
as we could make it. 
   It didn't help. The battery soon flickered and died. Whether it was
from the liquid or it just ran out, I never knew. I let the lamp fall
from my hand and swam towards the shaft of light.
   I got close enough to see that the figure on the cross was
faceless. Seven eyes were tattooed on a dark surface in green, all
connected by a triangle. A spear shot out from it's chest, piercing
the location of the heart, if it even had one.
   **Who enters my domain?**
   I stopped dead, almost sinking beneath the surface of the liquid.
"I do," I replied defiantly, somehow knowing that weakness or fear
would be a bad thing to show.
   **Do you have a name, mortal?** The voice was not quite internal,
like the Unit was, and it wasn't quite external either, like Tashi or
Risa would be. It was just a part of the room, female-sounding, yet
overlapped by many. many other voices, all slightly out with one
another to create a dragging effect.
   "I do," I stated, floating lazily in the LCL. I offered no more.
   A long silence and then the voice laughed. **You are strong,
mortal,** the voice said. **Yes, you are one worthy of the Children I
have Created. But do not underestimate my other Children. I feel Them
coming, even now. They will be here soon.**
   I felt then, the presence of others in the liquid. I stayed
absolutely still, letting their minds touch mine. How many there were,
I couldn't tell. They all flowed one right after the other, each one
feeling only slightly different than the last.
   It happened suddenly. I started to choke with the overwhelming
smell of the LCL, it burned against my skin, and I felt like I was
about to sink. I didn't know how far down the floor was, and it was so
dark...
   I struggled my way back to the entrance. The only reference I had
was to look over my shoulder from time to time and make sure that the
shaft of light was still directly at my back. 
   I got out finally, ran up the stairs and ran away. I didn't stop
until I had reached a hallway I knew off by heart.
   The hall leading to the Eva bay. 
   Did I really want to go there? I asked myself. I knew I couldn't
handle the smell and feel of the LCL in the plug, and I didn't have my
thought sensors anyway. My feet started carrying me there anyway, even
though I walked with a jerky half limp.
   Unit-01's entry plug was open and ready to go. No one was in sight.
I climbed up to it awkwardly, tears in my eyes from the pain, got in
and shut the door. I didn't want to activate it, just sit in the plug
and be alone.
   "How could that have happened?" I whispered to myself as more tears
came, and not from pain. Memories now...even visual flashes against my
closed eyes. "What did I do to deserve that?"
   A weak ripple of anger ran over my mind, and it was not my own. I
thought then that it had to be a pretty strong ripple of anger, if I
felt it without my thought sensors.
   Before I had much of a chance to ponder over that, there was a soft
tap at the plug door. "Mei?" came Tashi's voice. "Mei...could you at
least open the door for a moment?"
   I wiped at my eyes with the back of my hand, knowing that it would
be obvious that I had been crying. I got out of the seat and opened
the door, though I didn't get out.
   "Here," he said, tossing my thought sensors at me one at time; I
caught them both. "I thought you might want those," he said, his eyes
holding mine.
   I couldn't answer. Instead, I only returned his gaze for a moment,
then nodded once to acknowledge the gift, and retreated back inside,
closing the door tightly.
   I affixed the sensors to my head slowly, trying to find the best
place on my head with my new haircut. I ran my hand over my hair,
still damp as it was with LCL and only one sensor attached. With a
small shake of my head, I reached up and put the other sensor on.
   **Where is he? I'll kill him!** the Unit roared in my head. I had
to grab my temples to brace my thoughts against the force of it. I
barely realized that the Unit had repeated what Tashi had said.
   "He's...elsewhere," I replied when I could, my head pounding with a
sudden headache. "Tashi wants one of us to take him far far away, and
I'd rather not do it." I could barely think.
   **I'm hurting you!** I didn't understand, but a few moments later,
the headache dulled into a barely noticable throb just behind my
eyes.** Is that better?**
   "Yes," I said, grateful.
   There was a long moment of silence. **It's not your fault, Mei,**
he said.
   "Huh?"
   **Your mind is very open right now -- oh there it goes. It's not
your fault Mei. You did nothing to warrant that kind of attack.**
   "What if I did?" I cried, leaning forward in the seat and wrapping
my arms around my chest, wincing as I pressed a little too hard on the
wounds. "I could have..."
   **No,** he disagreed vehemently. **Believe me, I would have been
the first to know.**
   "What do you mean?" My voice was very quiet through the tears I was
forcing down.
   **First, let Tashi inside. You need to release.**
   I didn't listen. I did open the door, and Tashi was waiting on the
other side, but I ran past him back to my room, where I locked the
door, sat on my bed and held my knees to my chest, crying until I felt
sick.

Chapter 19

   It took a long time for me to recover.
   I was fine physically in about a month. I was back in a plug suit
in less than a week after the incident, and back in the Eva as pilot
not long after that, though I was immensely relieved that it didn't
try to talk to me for another month yet. Emotionally, however...
   Risa handled Kyle's departure. Whenever Tashi mentioned it to me, I
just froze up and couldn't respond to anything until the subject was
turned to something else. She just said that she sent him far away. I
heard her later tell Tashi that she had gone as far as her power cable
would let her and then overhand-threw him as far as the Eva could.
Satisfied that he was gone for good, I was able to relax a little. I
was still afraid of taking a bath by myself and made sure that someone
was near when I went to sleep. When I could sleep. It often evaded me
for a long time, no matter how tired I was. Most of all, I was scared
to be alone with Tashi.
   It was completely unreasonable, and I knew it. Tashi had done
nothing to me, had shown me nothing but kindness and sympathy, among
other things, but never had he ever even hinted that he meant me any
harm. Still, inside I was still an emotional mess, and I was afraid of
Tashi, of what he might do. Completely unreasonable...and I refused to
talk about it.
   They noticed, of course, that I carried myself differently, that I
acted differently around Tashi, even when Risa was with me. I was
almost afraid to wear the plug suit, because it was so tight fitting.
Every day, I would lock myself in the bathroom and stare at my
reflection, telling myself silently all the things that Kyle had said.
I kept feeling his body pressing down on mine; I kept seeing the look
on his face and in his eyes. Every day, I cried my eyes dry, thinking
that there were no more left, but the next day, there were always
more.
   When Unit-01 did start talking to me, it was only briefly. I don't
even remember what happened that day. It might have been a sync test;
it might have been an above-ground venture with Risa; it really could
have been anything. The Unit spoke a grand total of five words, and I
don't even remember what they were.
   About a week after that, I started dreaming again. It wasn't bad
dreams like before. Instead, a pretty blonde girl visited me. We would
sit in a classroom (at least that's what I think it was) in two desks
by the window and talk. At first we would talk about nothing special,
like the weather. I didn't really understand what the weather would
accomplish, seeing as I hadn't really seen anything but rainstorms,
thunderstorms, and dark boiling clouds so thick that nothing could
penetrate them when I was above ground. The last time I had seen
sunlight or light cloud cover, not these pitch-black ones, had been
before I was taken to the work force. Even so, the weather outside the
window was beautiful. Sunlight, bright and clear, streamed through the
window, coating everything in a bright golden halo.
   No one else was in the classroom. I remembered, very briefly, that
the classroom in my other dreams had been exactly the same, but the
thought didn't stick. I forgot it again almost right away.
   "Nothing's wrong," the blonde girl had said, waving her hand
carelessly in the air. "Nothing's wrong with you, at least. It was all
in his head." I didn't know what she was talking about, and when I
woke up, I couldn't remember the dream.
   I had these dreams for two weeks, something like that. I could
never remember them when they happened, but bits and pieces always
came back later. I didn't realize it at the time, but it was Unit-01
who had been giving me the dreams. I met two people in the dream, the
blonde girl and a dark haired boy, and they made me talk about
everything that had been bothering me, including Kyle. The girl was no
one real. The boy was intended to represent Shinji Ikari.
   Unit-01 told me it was for two reasons. The first was that I was
such a mess inside, I needed help and I was unwilling to seek it. I
still didn't like being alone or taking a bath by myself, and I still
hated being alone with Tashi, but I could at least tell myself that I
was fine, that Kyle was gone, that Tashi wasn't going to hurt me. The
second was that I couldn't bring myself to believe the change in the
Unit, and that I needed to get used to it so we could operate as the
best team we could be.
   **We need to be prepared for the Angels. They're coming back,** he
had said.
   I had no idea what he meant. I wasn't about to ask Tashi. But I was
willing now to at least accept the change in the Eva.
   I spent a lot of time in the entry plug, just sitting there and
conversing with the Unit. Well, maybe not conversing. I would sit
there, and I could feel his conscious on mine. Sometimes, we would
actually talk, and I was getting more used to that form of
communication. 
   I finally got up the nerve to talk to Tashi, see if he knew about
these 'Angels'.
   I found him alone one afternoon, about an hour after lunch. Risa, I
knew, was off in Unit-00 doing something with some power cables in a
lower recess of NERV. She had said that if we had room for
a...something or other (I don't remember what she said), then she
would make use of that room.
   Tashi was in C&C; I paused outside for a moment, fighting back the
fear that took me. Gulping down air and forcing my stomach to calm
down, I pushed the half-closed door open and walked in, hoping that my
shaky knees weren't obvious.
   He looked up as the door creaked open. "Oh, Mei," he said, smiling.
"I'm glad it's you. I want you to see this." He turned back to the wad
of papers he was studying.
   I swallowed and went to his side, keeping a tight rein on my
impulses, the first of which was to run away as fast as I could.
   They weren't papers, was my first thought. They were pieces of very
thin plastic or metal, or something thin, flat and opaque. A diagram
took up most of the sheet on top. Lines and tight writing pointed to
various places all over the diagram. I had to lean close to even make
out the different words, and even then it was hard to read. I still
couldn't read all that well, though if I went slowly, I could get
through it all.
   The diagram, however, was fascinating. I did have to lean in close
to see it clearly, and for a moment, I forgot that Tashi was right
there, and that I had to lean around him to see it. It was a sketch of
Eva 01 in both front, side and back views, with the entry plug below
in a cut-a-way. Then I realized that my stomach was pressed against
Tashi's arm and I hurriedly straightened and backed a step away. 
   "So what does it mean?" I asked, trying to sound casual.
   Tashi swung his chair around, looking at me oddly. "There's a sheet
for every Unit. Now we can find out how each one is supposed to look
so we can fix them properly. I think..." He turned back and shuffled
through the sheets before turning to me again. He looked excited.
"There's a sheet on how the neural connections work and how the wiring
goes, and everything! This is great, Mei!" He jumped out of the chair
and hugged me.
   I just froze. I couldn't do anything. I just stood there, stiff as
a board, with my mind frozen stuck. My reactions were useless.
   "What's wrong?" Tashi asked, pulling back and holding me at arm's
length. I only stared at him. After a long moment, my jaw moved, but
no sound came out. My hands came up under my chin so that my arms
unconsciously covered my chest, plug suit encased as it was.
   He looked shocked. "Mei...I wouldn't do that to you. I just
couldn't..." His hands slid down from my shoulders to just above my
elbows. I stared up at him, shaking with the memories I couldn't force
back. He was so much taller now...
   "I'm not like him, Mei," he continued softly. "What he did was
just...sickening!" He dropped his eyes from mine, and his hands
loosened their grip. "I almost killed him, Mei. I would have, too, but
I knew it would have upset you even more." He raised his eyes again.
They were flashing with a desire for me to believe him. "Sometimes I
think the only reason I was born was for you, Mei," he whispered.
"Everything I do...everything I've done...it's been for you."
   I couldn't take anymore. My impulses kicked in with ferocity and I
broke free of his grasp, running out of the room as fast as I could
without hurting myself. I ran to Unit-01 and climbed into the entry
plug, activating it so that it slid down into the Eva. I couldn't say
why I did that. I just did.
   **Did you ask?** the Unit asked as soon as I was breathing LCL. 
   I hugged myself, wrapping my arms tightly over my chest. "No," I
answered softly. "I couldn't..." In my 3-D view of the Eva bay around
me, I saw Unit-00 return, moving past the cage of the white Unit we
had removed the chest plate from.
   A barely seen flicker and the cage was broken. Unit-00 lay on its
side, the chest-less white Unit crouched on top.
   "What's going on?" I demanded, staring at the scene in shock.
   **GET OUT OF THE CAGE!!!** Unit-01 shouted at me. I had to gasp for
breath afterwards. **Help her! Unit-08 will destroy her!**
   My hands flew to the controls and I twisted them; the Unit
responded instantly, grabbing the catwalk across its throat and
ripping it down. He tore the cage door down and ran out into the bay,
dashing forward with an agility I've only ever seen hinted at. I was
surprised; I'd had no idea that the Unit could move like this.
   Unit-01 pounced on the white Eva, knocking it off Unit-00 and
farther down the corridor. Kneeling over it, Unit-01 began to punch at
the white one, the huge fists making large dents in the shoulder
plates.
   It was like I was an observer, rather than the operator. The Unit
was displaying a visciousness I had never known...except that one
time, before the workforce had stolen Unit-00. That's what the white
Eva was trying to do now, steal Unit-00 from me again.
   It was irrational. I knew it was. Maybe it wasn't even my own
thought, and planted there by an external source. I didn't know, and I
wasn't about to ask. I knew I wasn't going to get an answer. So I just
pounded on the white Unit until it stopped moving and trying to fight
back. Then I stopped, leaning back on my heels. I was all but gasping
for breath.
   "What...happened?" I demanded of Unit-01.
   **You took the chest plate off. The same thing happened to me once.
The armor is all that holds the body of the Unit in place, keeps in
check. The armor is the only thing that bends the Eva to your will. If
I did not wear the armor I do now, I would not need you.**
   "Well, you don't have to sound so smug about it." Sometimes, he
really got on my nerves. 
   **I never said that I wouldn't keep you, just that I wouldn't need
you.** 
   I had the distinct impression that I was being laughed at.
   Unit-08 activated again, half-sitting up so that the hands wrapped
around my throat. I almost couldn't react, but I managed to get my
hands on the controls and brought my own hands up to pry the other
Unit off. 
   **Get the globe! The red globe in its chest. If you destroy it or
at least crack it, it will stop moving for good!**
   "Easier said than done," I muttered. I was safe inside the plug, I
supposed, but it really felt like I was being strangled. The white,
shapeless face grinned demonically at me, gaining more of a grip on me
with each second.
   **In your left shoulder guard! There's a vibro knife there. Get
it!**
   I took one hand off the white one's to reach up and fight for the
tall armor plate rising off my shoulder. The front part popped open
and down and the knife rose out partway. My hand closed around the
handle and I whipped it down. The blade glowed slightly; my hand
switched the grip so that it was a stabbing tool and brought it down
on the red globe. It bounced off, but it went down again. It was so
hard to breathe...
   **What's going on?!** a part of my mind screamed at me. I barely
heard it.
   I was suddenly reminded of the enforced vision I'd had so long ago.
The red globe with the fetal human in it set in the chest of the
Angel. It was too late to stop. The blade buried itself in the globe
and Unit-08 fell away. I gasped for breath. 
   I released the controls but the Eva stayed in its crouched
position. "What did I do...?" I asked softly, staring at my suited
hands.
   **What was necessary. It would have destroyed us, and every other
Eva here and then escaped and run out to destroy everything else it
could find. You did the right thing, Mei. You saved us all.**
   I didn't move. I could hardly think. The only difference had been
that there was no humanoid fetus in the globe. 
   Risa picked her Eva up off the bay floor. One arm hung at her side.
She stumbled over to me and laid her good hand on my forearm. A little
screen popped up in my 3-D view with Risa's face visible. "It's okay,
Mei," she said. "It...it wasn't sane..."
   "It doen't matter," I said quietly. "It was alive."
   She snorted. "So was Kyle; did he deserve to live?"
   I shuddered. "It's not the same -- "
   "Yes it is! You can't go around feeling guilty all the time, Mei.
We need you too much. If you can't be strong for us, how can you be
strong for yourself?" The screen closed abruptly. 
   **She's right, you know.**
   "Shut up!"
   **No. She is right. I know your mind now, Mei. You are a strong
person inside. If you can't be strong, when the Angels return, we will
all die.**
  

Luna Ayanami 
AKA the Nefarious Oni Ayanami Luna
ayanami@highlandgrey.com
~or~
oni_ayanami@hotmail.com

My realms (or hells, depends on your PoV)
http://www.geocities.com/Tokyo/Temple/8016/index.htm
http://members.tripod.com/~Oni_Ayanami/index.htm
ICQ: Tenshi (4833622)